People asking for plus one

Do I think youre being mean no, but I would also be prepared for people to decline if they cant bring their SO. My husband and I moved in together after 3 months and even at that point we only attended social events together.

Not mean at all. I wouldn’t want someone who’s been with a friend/ family member of mine to bring a plus one they just started dating. My FH was in a wedding the first month of us dating and I told him even even if they said I could go I wouldn’t. Because I wouldn’t have known a single person there and that’s someone’s big day.

View Quoted Comment But yeah regardless of individual situations, it’s definitely rude to ask for a plus one if you weren’t given one, especially if the relationship started after invitations were sent and the guest list was obviously finalized

View Quoted Comment No. The one person I feel weird about giving a plus one is my friend whis dated literally 5 guys in the past year.

If they were not in a relationship when invites went out, you're fine.

As far as plus ones in general go, everyone in a relationship is getting an invite for their so, as of now, but I'm lucky most of those relationships have been for a while and I like them all. Most of our oot guests are single and coming from about 8 hours away. They are not getting guests, because they all know each other (college friends). I joked to my fbil, that he better not start dating someone before our wedding. I know etiquette wise, hes supposed to get a plus one because hes VIP or whatever, but he knows 98% of the other guests so it's not happening. (My brother will not be getting one either, so it's not like I'm playing favorites with my family or anything)

View Quoted Comment Because I really dont feel comfortable paying 50 bucks for a stranger

View Quoted Comment I get the now wanting to be alone thing. I believe that is something to consider

To be honest, I think it's rude for them to ask about bringing someone if you've already sent out invitations addressed to them specifically. So, if you've already sent out invites, you shouldn't feel mean at all. If you haven't and are having an intimate wedding, you still don't have to invite them.

I just expected a plus one. Regardless of if it's someone they are dating or someone they asked to come keep them company

View Quoted Comment I am doing the exact same thing. Only having 40 guests and about 4 are plus ones. Yes id have liked to invite more family/friends but i didnt not want to tell anyone they had to come alone.

Everyone is entitled to their own way of doing things for their own wedding but that said my thought is I want people to have a blast at my wedding! I gave everyone who is invited a plus one because if that means they’ll have a better time with a buddy then awesome. A lot of people actually declined their plus one so it hasn’t been too much of a financial strain for me in terms of a final head count.

I don’t think it’s mean. You decided your guest list the way it is for a reason. I don’t think it’s your responsibility to gauge how guests social lives might be going by the time your wedding happens lol. I think it’s super rude that people actually asked for a plus one. But I do think if you knew someone was in a serious relationship when you sent invites then They should have a plus one. My FH was IN a wedding last year (we had been dating 3 years and FH was already ring shopping) and I wasn’t invited...that was weird lol..at the wedding the groom told FH they didn’t invite me because they “didn’t think we were serious” jokes on them, they broke up ON THE HONEYMOON 😨😭 but even though it was weird that I didn’t get an invite FH still had fun at the wedding and that now ex-groom is in our wedding (we even gave him a plus one 😂)

View Quoted Comment

"Why would someone (as a plus one) want to attend one of the most intimate moments of someone else’s lives, if you barely know those people??"

Fully agree. It's like people see it as a party. My guests are only getting SO if I've met them. With my wedding being so intimate and small, I've met all my good friend's SO. Some of my FH's friends are not getting their new significant other invited, because we are keeping it to only people we know on our very personal/intimate day! No one has complained or asked otherwise because they have the proper understanding of how small the guest list is - intentionally so.

I'm just going to be really honest here....... I'm sorry, but I can't imagine inviting a person without a plus one. I seriously thought that was expected, is it not? If it were me, I'd think it was rude of the bride to not allow a plus one. 😖 🤷‍♀️ I would invite someone if I couldn't allow for them to bring a date. What if they don't know anyone at the reception?

View Quoted Comment

Agree with this - FH and I (who have now been together more than 4.5 years) were basically shacked up after 72 hours... granted it wasn't "official" for about 4 months, but we didn't spend a night apart. I would have been insulted if someone discredited our relationship because they didn't feel we had met some time limit of appropriateness.

That said, I a of the school of thought that everyone gets a plus one... I wouldn't ask someone to my party without being certain they had at least one person they were comfortable with to hang with and dance with. I know, I know... "but they know everyone else there"... but if everyone else is with a date, that leaves them a third wheel, at a romantic event... no fun.

View Quoted Comment See I'd rather have people I'm close to and children I love then someone's random plus one or partner I have no clue who really is. I'd never cut out people I care about to make room for basic strangers.

View Quoted Comment But those people you are close to and care about may have a partner they care about and what you’re saying by not inviting them is that you don’t actually care.

Anyone who was single when we sent save the dates is not getting a plus one.... we have our numbers we need to stick to and we had those numbers when save the dates went out...

If they were not in relationships when you sent the invites, you’re fine. If they were, then that is your error.
In addition, a person’s SO is not a “plus one”. SO’s should be invited by name. “Plus ones” are for single guests.

View Quoted Comment Exactly, like sure some people may be very serious in their relationship after a month or even after a few weeks, but is this person close with the couple who is getting married? Most likely not. Inviting someone shouldn’t be determined by the seriousness of their relationship with another guest, it should be determined by their relationship with the couple who’s wedding it is