Parents think I am too young?

I don't think you are too young. I am 24 and my FH is 23. We will be 26 and 25 by the time we get married but people still think we are too young. You can't please everyone. As long as you both are able to support yourselves and you are not living paycheck to paycheck I don't see what the issue is.

I just turned 25 and FH is turning 24 this upcoming week, it has nothing to do with age. It has everything to do with your relationship!

I'm 21 got engaged at 20 and will be married at 22. AGE DOESN'T MATTER as long as you are responsible, mature and can handle your own.

I don't think you're too young. You've known each other and I'm assuming have grown together even though you're doing the long distance thing right now (for grad school?) I think you're very smart to finish school before getting married.

My advice would be for you NOT to get married straight out of grad school. Instead, as a big sister I would want you to move in together for at least 6 months to a year and see how things go. People are very different once you live with them 24/7. This living together is a great opportunity to learn and explore each other. Also for seeking pre-marital counseling early on if you find you're not getting along as well as you thought you would. Marriage is more than just a wedding, it's learning to work together as a team. I truly hope you two the best!

ETA: my advice for preparing your parents is for you two to move in together first and show that you're committed and ready, that you're both responsible and taking the best steps to a healthy marriage, that you're not just being "young and dumb" good luck!

Age has nothing to do with it. I'll be 21 when I marry and FH will he 24. We both work full time and live on our own. Our parents accept the fact we are marrying and haven't said anything about age. I don't think you're to young. As long as you're happy. Ignore the negativity.

OriginalRandi always has the best responses.

Age has nothing to do with it. Someone can be 40 and act like a 16 year old and Someone else could be 20 and have more maturity than a 35 year old. If you are confident in your choice then I would just ease them into it.

The thing that gives me pause about what you've said is that you're currently long-distance. How long have you been long distance?

My FH and I dated in high school, and then spent 8 years (!) long distance. We've now been living together for the last two years. Although we both knew we wanted to be together forever, we both wanted to make sure our relationship was strong when we were in the same place.

Things can really change once you're no longer long-distance. Once you and your FH are living in the same place, I'd really recommend just enjoying being together for six months or a year and then talking again about marriage.

You're not too young to get married, but your parents may be worried that you're not 'settled' enough. Once you're both living in the same city, that may change.

Good luck, and welcome to WW!

I'm going to chime in as an old person (34 - and will be holding :-) ).

Looking back on my 20s there is no way that I was ready for marriage, not because I was immature, but because I was not with the right person. As what has been previously mentioned, maturity is required from both partners.

It is funny that 23/24 is viewed as too young to marry by some people. My parents married in the early 60s at the age of 22. In their day, they were really old to be getting married. Don't let societal shifts make you question what you know to be the right thing for you. However, if your family has reservations about the relationship, it is prudent to hear them out. Sometimes they can see things that you cant when in love. Not an age thing, just a love thing.

Hope everything turns out ok.

I think it is more about each individual situation and less about age. It isn't anyone's place to cast judgment on you or tell you that you are too young. Unfortunately, there isn't much you can do to sway someone who is convinced that you are too young to be married. All you can do is stand your ground and let them know that it is happening regardless and you would like them to be on board with you if only for the fact that they love you both. When it comes down to it though, they may still be distant. The best advice I can give is don't worry about those people and focus on your wedding and, more importantly, your marriage.

Age is a number, I will be 28, and my FW will be 25. My FIL got married when they were 22/25 got engaged 3 months after they met, and have been together for 32 years. My parents on the other hand got married at 22/27 and they were married 10 years before divorce. I think it depends on how emotionally strong you are, marriage/any type of relationship is hard work. My FW and I were in a long distance relationship and once we moved in with each other, things changed. You have to learn to live with the person, learn how to deal with their annoying tendencies; no matter how much you don't think that'll be a problem, it will be. Just make sure you can handle the stresses of marriage, before you make any decisions.

FH and I have been together since I was 16 and he was 18 as well. I'll be 25 and he'll be 27 when we get married in a few months. I don't think 25 is too young, obviously. However, we are only having a 10 month engagement so we were older when we actually got engaged.

Age has nothing to do with anything. Although we just got married, my DH and I have been together since 23...and we are 34 now! My sister married at 20 and they're madly in love. Most of of college friends who married right after college are still together. What matters is that when you change (because you will), you also change together. Xo

And OKD, we are NOT old!!! ;-)

I don't think you're too young. My only advice would be, before getting married to live with each other for at least 6 months. Do not get married without living together first.

Listen, when I get married, I'll be about a month from turning 32. I still don't feel "established" half the time. I don't think there will be a magic moment when you say, "Yep, I'm established now. Time to get hitched." Maybe that's just me.

I'm very glad I didn't get married at 23 because I'm such a different person now. But I don't think things would have ended in some world-ending way if I had.

The two things I would caution you about are these: you've been long distance. I would spend some time closer before the marriage. I don't think you have to live with each other first though.

Secondly, you've mentioned your parents hesitation about your age. I would have a talk with them just to clarify that it's ONLY the age that concerns them and not something else. As someone else mentioned, love can blind us to things that others see clearly.

Engaged at 20, FH was 21. Life is great. People will hum and haw over your decisions, when that's exactly what they are, YOURS.

Chin up Princess, you'll do great.

I don't think you are too young at all! I will be 22 and FH will be 21. I have gotten that from my family as well a little bit, but they are in the old mindset of going to college to find a husband, so not a lot. I also will not be living with him until after marriage because I am going into church work and we will be long distance until next May. I'd say just make sure that you are including them on conversations about your plans so that they can warm up to it and they aren't blindsided. I've always wanted to be younger when I got married and want to have all my kids before I'm 30. I'm so lucky that I found FH at a young age.

For the amount of time you guys have been together I don't think you're too young at all if you have a healthy and strong relationship. If you are not living together for religious reasons then ok but if you can live together I think that would be beneficial. A lot of researchers have been talking about how in American society marriage has shifted from a "building block event" so like our parents' generation it was something you did along the way, before you built your career and had all your ducks in a row. Today it has become a "cornerstone event" which is once you have all of the foundation elements built and in place. One way is not better than the other but it is a societal shift that might explain why your parents are concerned.

I think one of the most important things you can do is have real honest and open conversations about what you see your lives like together financially, culturally, day-to-day and long term goals.

In Israel (where I live) a lot of people (usually religious people but not only) get married very young and well before they are "established" because they find the right person and they build their lives together. People here are mature and it works, it's very common to see married women (and men!) around the age of 22, 23 or even older working on their bachelor degrees, so they don't have everything "done" yet. You even see young married women in class with newborns sometimes! Since living here I've gotten over the idea that marriage needs to be a "cornerstone event" since I've seen so many people marry into supportive, loving and mature relationships at a young age. It depends on the person.

I'm 24, FH is 33. We are getting married... No big deal. Do what makes you happy. As long as you and your FH are happy with your relationship that's what matters.