Padrinos (sponsors aka friends of honor)

You can't ask for money. If people off that is great, but you can't ask them.

Huh? I thought padrino just meant godfather in Spanish. This is weird.

I would feel really uncomfortable letting anyone else pay for any part of my wedding. I don't see that idea ending very well.

Perhaps you could further explain this concept - I am assuming this is something cultural that people here are not familiar with. Wedding "sponsors" are not going to go over well here just to let you know.

If they are offering, why do you have to ask?

Well in the hispanic culture our closest family and friends are asked to be Padrinos and they choose to pay for something for the wedding. Sponsors is what it would translate to in English.

Holly, so I should not ask? I would feel more comfortable if they offer but some of my new in laws are insisting I ask their side of the family.

I've seen this in Filipino wedding families too. If they want to proactively pay for something or give you money, fantastic, but I wouldn't ask or put that out there. If they bring it up, have an answer. If they don't, don't bring it up yourself.

Padrinos = "Godparents"/ Sponsors pay or gift you something for your wedding.

I've seen this done before at "some" Hispanic weddings and quinceañeras. I personally think it's rude to ask people to pay for things. I've seen people have padrinos for everything!!!! Beer, wedding rings, cake, church decor, I can go on. Personally, I think it's tacky to go and ask people to give you money. Plus it's awkward as hell to go to a relative and say "hey, I'm getting married, What would you like to help with"!!!

It's very common for my social group to have padrinos but we've told everyone that has asked that we aren't having padrinos because we are hosting and paying for everything ourselves. I don't need anyone buying or sponsoring my wedding. I wouldn't ask ANYONE TO GIVE YOU MONEY!

Good response, Celia Milton.

And yes, Miss NC i haven't asked but i'm already feeling awkward even thinking about it.

If someone offers to pay for something, then I think it's wonderful to recognize their contribution. So making them a "Padrino" is lovely, but asking is a whole different thing.

I learned a new word today. :-)

I had a lot of family telling me they wanted to be Padrinos. I don't feel comfortable asking them for money, even though they offered. I asked my mom what to do and she told me if they approached me with money in hand asking to pay for whatever (invites, flowers, etc) to take it since they offered. Guess what? No one has approached me since they told me they wanted to help. And I'm kindda greatful. With money comes strings and I want to plan MY wedding, not what my family would want.

I like Celia's advice. If they are offering their help you could tell them then what you're needing help with. But I'd feel weird assigning tasks to people or flat out asking. Or, since it's cultural, if you're 100% POSITIVE they want to help, I would ask what they would like to help with. That gives them some free range to decide what's within their own budget.

I know I'm incorporating the lazo and the arras in our Catholic ceremony. My godmother has been very adamant about "gifting" us something and after awhile I told her that I would be more honored that her and her husband be the one that put the lazo on us because I look up to their marriage.

I think the idea of "padrinos" is so old school. No one has padrinos anymore. If someone offers money as a gift then graciously accept but please don't go around asking for folks to be padrinos.

Thanks everyone! I feel much better about the situation. I will pass along the advise to my in laws.

From Brazilian culture, my understanding of "padrinhos" is just the equivalent of the US concept of "bridesmaids/groomsmen". FH has been asked to be a padrinho several times and each time he's only been required to show up in the suit the groom chooses and buy a wedding gift.

I love the cord/veil/coins ritual; many of my couples include it and I think it's so interesting for those who have never seen it!

I was having the same problem. I'm sending a personal letter to everybody we would like to request sponsorship from (i.e. We're a very hispanic family so it's very common). Here's the poem I put in the letter.

We used mipadrino.com to organize our padrinos online and they allowed us to accept funds online. Super easy!!