Overcoming wedding planning regrets

We had guest list regrets, some diy regrets on printing stuff out, and we regret having our bar switch to cash. But really none of that mattered in the end, we loved every second

I swear my wedding planning process has been filled with nothing but regret. I ended up buying a new dress for the third time. We booked a venue but then found they double booked us so we had to pick a new date or a new venue. We decided to book a new venue. I now very much regret that choice. I have purchased so many décor items that I will not be using. We have changed our colors a lot. We just recently lost our caterer which by the way was the 3rd caterer we picked. UGH it just never ends. I just remind my self that even though another venue would have been better, or I like a different caterer better etc., we will still have an amazing wedding. Also the one thing I have never regretted was my FH so really that's all that matters!

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Oh wow, I feel your pain. I just have so many things I need to start doing, but I feel kind of stuck because I don't want to keep spending more money at a venue that I don't like but I have to at this point. I've put too much down in deposits. I would be eloping if it weren't for FH wanting to have a wedding.

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Did you wish you had invited more or less people?

We started planning a bigger wedding and ended up regretting all of it. The venue, having a wedding party, the food and the guest list. So we changed it all 10 months out. We have now planned a much more intimate wedding with more focus on us. With the money saved we r able to go on a week long honeymoon right away instead of waiting a year. Making that change has been the best decision we could have ever made. Way less stress and drama but we still kept all the elegance and bells and whistles that we wanted just on a smaller scale. And being able to start our married life on our honeymoon, priceless!!

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That's great! I think I just need to remind myself of all the money I'm saving by picking this venue so we can go on more trips!

Oh my goodness, Allie. I JUST made a post about this. So strange! I am regretting my venue and I'm trying to decide if changing it is worth the hassle.

100%. I think it’s Normal for every bride to get her in head about things, especially because there are so many decisions to make, details to handle, money to spend, etc etc. They can get lost! In hindsight, I definitely would’ve gone the city hall route! Some cities have beautiful City halls, would’ve saved the money. What I’m trying to focus on going in is that there are people who support me and my fiancé, and it’s a day celebrating us, it’ll be beautiful looking back at all the pictures we’ll have forever.

I'm regretting some of the things we've spent more money on, like our photographer. She's coming from OOT and I'm just nervous that I could have gotten a better deal from someone local.

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Different people. Not more or less

I haven't had any regrets yet but we are 10 months out so I'm sure we will soon!

Just remember that what truly matters is that at the end of the day you get to marry your best friend and soul mate. Most of the time people attending the wedding won't remember the little stuff, they will remember the love that filled the room.

Umm... everything? Lol. I’ve pretty much regretted and/or changed every single decision we’ve made, EXCEPT for the dress 😂 then last week I tried on my dress for the first time since buying it and I was like “nope, not even going to allow myself to regret this” because it’s getting so exhausting second-guessing/redoing everything! Here’s some of the regrets we (and by “we” I mean mostly me, with FH saying “I think it’s fine but I see why you want to change it” LOL):
-my RING. I always wanted a simple solitaire! But when we went to go pick out my ring (we did it together) both FH and I got so carried away with “ooohhh look at how pretty and sparkly these 3 stone halos are!” (Not that there’s anything wrong with more elaborate rings but... it just isn’t “me”!) We ended up buying a 3 stone halo and while it was beautiful, I wound up in tears over it 6 months later because it didn’t feel like “my ring” (silly, I know) But “luckily” I suppose, it turned out that the jeweler had actually messed up the sizing with my ring and we wound up being able to return it and got a whole new ring—a simple, radiant-cut solitaire, and I am sooo happy with it and grateful that we basically got a second chance! Lol
-photography. Originally hired a friendor. After engagement photos already started to feel it affecting our friendship negatively. Told a little white lie to get out of it and hired a new photographer! (My friend and his gf are coming as guests now which is much better)
-venue. I always wanted a beach wedding but we decided on a local historic inn because (1) wanted to be closer to my grandparents (2) I was getting too stressed worrying about the weather for an outdoor wedding (3) all the beach venues near us were way too expensive. We didn’t change this one—but I’m learning to love it, as it is where we’re getting married!
-sending save the dates too early to too many people. Not sure if we would’ve changed our guest list but, it would’ve been nice to have the flexibility of it, and not been locked in to the majority of our list so early on. I got excited and sent them out to EVERYONE as soon as we booked out venue, 11 months before the wedding lol. This was also before I was on WW and could have been advised against that!
-our honeymoon. My amazing, patient, easygoing FH has helped me plan about 5 different honeymoons 😂 first I wanted a big European excursion. But then that was too stressful and expensive right after the wedding. Then I wanted something simple and local, but then started to feel that wasn’t special enough. FH started to have enough of my indecisiveness and decided on a middle ground of going to the Bahamas!

I think regret is a totally normal part of planning something so major. We tend to fixate on the details trying to make everything as perfect as possible!

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Weird! Have you already put deposits down?

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I'm looking forward to the pictures! And getting to spend the wedding weekend with both of our families.

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What made you decide on someone from OOT?

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Yup! About $5,000. The thing is, I have regret of choosing the wrong venue within the same company. They have 5 or so properties and I regret not choosing the other one. I sent an email today asking if it was at all possible to switch venues. I assumed it wouldn't hurt to ask but I highly doubt October 12 is open still. Oh well!

Bridesmaid and venue regret. I wish I would of taken more time to carefully choose my bridesmaids. I chose people based off of FH's family, and not the ones closest to me. I love my venue, but our guest list is so big that it's creating stress....so I wish we would have taken more consideration of guest list before booking. If it makes you feel better, we have 49 people above capacity....sooooo, in my opinion, you're doing great, lol. Luckily we have a plan to accommodate everyone, but we are (unfortunately) hoping to get enough RSVP no's that we won't need to make the extra arrangements.

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Thank you. I'm trying to keep my focus on that. I never thought I'd be stressing over addressing invites but here I am lol.

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I had a similar ring experience!!!! I always knew I wanted a solitaire, but got hung up on three stone the first time we went shopping. THEY ARE SO SPARKLY especially in the showroom. I actually took one home and in normal lighting, the stones were very low quality. Thankfully, FH bought a beautiful solitaire.

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My venue also has two other properties but I've already been such a hassle with changing my date and the other property is so much more expensive so I think I'm going to stick with what I have.