Ok, what's a mob to do about a bouquet toss?

I agree, this isn't something that you really get to decide (or even have a strong opinion about). If your daughter has a lot of girlfriends who are excited to do a bouquet toss, then it will be a fun positive experience. No need for it to be weird. It's only weird if girls are literally forced onto the dance floor (like by a DJ). So you could mention this concern, but other than that, let it go.

For what it's worth, my good friend had a bouquet toss at her wedding last summer. I stood front and center and elbowed another girl (good naturedly) to catch the bouquet. Low and behold, I got engaged two week later and I am the next in the friend group to get married. We have fun pictures from the event, my FH got some gentle teasing, and now it's a joke between all of us.

I think it's a harmless tradition and totally voluntary. It's not meant to offend. It's meant to be fun.

I personally don’t like the bouquet toss, but it’s an activity that hardly takes any time at all so it’ll be over real quick.

At my best friend's wedding, she did all the women that weren't married! So even if they were in a relationship, engaged, or single! It basically just included everyone but the married ones, so it was a little less awkward.

IMO it's only really rude/uncomfortable when people (especially the DJ) are pushing people who don't want to participate out onto the floor.

I’ve never seen anyone take it so seriously. This may be ignorance on my part so sorry if I’ve just always seen the bouquet toss done wrong - I always get confused when people get upset that you’re calling out single, unattached people because every time I’ve seen a bouquet toss, single girls and girls in varying levels of serious relationships have all joined in for the toss. I’ve never thought of it as calling out only legitimately single girls because women who are attached have always participated.

I did one. I had at least twenty girls who were either single or dating someone. I purposely threw it to my brothers girlfriend, everyone laughed, it took two minutes.

I’ve never heard of anyone getting legitimately upset but I guess it can be awkward if there are literally only three unmarried girls. Honestly though, it’s your daughters wedding. It’s her decision. And this isn’t something like self catering or a four hour gap. If she wants to do it, I’d just step back and let her do it.

View Quoted Comment Exactly. There have been weddings where I wanted to sit it out because in my years, I’ve caught SEVEN bouquets. Sure enough, people seeing me still seated would literally drag me into the floor. It is uncomfortable when you don’t want to participate and people make you anyway. I’m team #notoss.

I didn't know that this would be an issue for my family, NOR did I know people were opting out of doing it. I personally will still be doing it, I have several cousins, AND bridesmaids that will be participating and have no fear of them NOT participating whatsoever....
My advice MOB is to mention your concerns, if you want to clear your concious but not to expect them to be followed, if that's what the Bride wants to do at HER wedding, then, unfortunately for you, that's what she is going to do!!!.....
I've known some pushy MOB who take over because they are paying for everything or a lot in the wedding, I hope this isn't a problem between you and your daughter!!! #justmy2cents

This is something you really get to have a say or a strong opinion about.

Your Daughter knows her crowd and it’s not that big of a deal. I have never see anyone pushed or forced onto the dance for foor this. It’s completely optional. It’s really up to her whether she wants to do it or not

Don’ get to have a say**

Depends on average age of guests imo. i thought it was fun the younger i was. i also loved when a lot older single women jumped in to do it- i mean taking shoes off to get it- it made it funny. if she wants to do it just go with it.

At my brother's wedding, I just didn't join it. MOB tried to force me and I just glared at her until she let go of my arm.

It’s not your wedding so it’s really not up to you.. my advice is to not say anything- you can’t conteol every aspect of her wedding

As MOB, you can voice your opinion to her, but ultimately she can do whatever she wants to because it’s her wedding. I have my mom coming in with her two cents and I either like her advice or I politely tell her that I’m doing things my way and she respects that.

Not doing a bouquet toss either.

I think it’s something you have to let go because ultimately it’s her wedding. As far as the cousin goes- no one forces anyone to get up there and it can be a fun tradition if they are enjoying it. I’m not doing it only because of time restraints on our night

There's an alternative called a circle toss that u could suggest to her. Let her know it would be something unique for her wedding but it is up to her if she would like to use it. This is how it goes. All the single women from a circle around the bride. The bride is blindfolded. U put music on. The women start to move in one direction and the bride walks in the opposite direction. Of course u will need someone in there to point her in the right direction. Once the music stops whomever she is standing in front of gets the bouquet.

Your guess is spot on.

Take a step back.

Breathe.

Let your daughter decide. It's her wedding.

I agree that it is not my cup of cocoa but I would just let it be. Their wedding, their choices. Not all people are turned off by it - some people may like it!! Look at it this way: There are always going to be people who are not on board with everything. I am not a fan of photobooths but I don't care if there is one at the reception.

View Quoted Comment

This hasn't been my experience. Despite being engaged to FH, I've been pulled up multiple times to do something I certainly don't want to do. I even almost caught the bouquet and got knocked down by the bride's (also engaged) sister.

As long as you don't have people forcing anyone to do it, it's not really a big deal, but I have been the unhappy victim of being forced into catching the stupid flowers.