OK to have a Bridal Shower the day BEFORE the Wedding (for Destination Weddings)?

I dont think it's rude. I think it makes perfect sense. My fiancee's family life down south and they are all coming the weekend of the wedding so I am having the shower rehearsal and wedding in one weekend. No one said anything in fact they were happy to attend.

Could you travel to have a shower that is closer to everyone else, or is everyone pretty scattered? Although at this point it's pretty late to let people know about shower plans though..So would you have a RD and a shower in the same day? I don't think it's that she doesn't want you to have one, it's more of the practical things she's asking I think..But maybe a bigger issue is why none of your family or BMs stepped up and figured this out earlier than 2ish weeks before the wedding, if your date is accurate under your pic.

Thanks Jaqueline and Ab. My FH, I and Kids live on the west coast due to his job. Our family and friends are all in PA, VA, NY, NJ, MD. So Ive done everything from here...the planning, dress shopped ALONE without my mom or friends (that sucked), and now I have to throw my own Bridal shower. I had my children here on the west coast so Ive never had a baby shower ETC. SOOOO a Bridal Shower is SOO important to me. I really want one!

I understand it is important to you, however, I don't think I would do it the day before your wedding, especially since people are incurring the expense of coming to you for the wedding.

I'm doing a reverse destination wedding. I live in TX, and everyone else lives in NH, so it's much easier for them. I'm having my bridal shower/bachelorette party the night before.

I'm doing a reverse destination wedding. I live in TX, and everyone else lives in NH, so it's much easier for them. I'm having my bridal shower/bachelorette party the night before.

Hmm well ya I see everyone is spread out..honestly they probably wouldn't have made the trip for the shower (they'd be out an extra plane ticket)..if you had it the the day before then they save that fair..I know i've declined shower invites just because I could not afford to fly out /pay for bus both times..So in that sense it's okay. But the rub comes in where they dont' really have ample notice..they will have to sorta rush out to get you another gift. (are these family members that wouldn't mind?) I kinda see what your sister is saying, it is like oh ya, um while you're here could you get me an extra present also ? type thing..but you know your guests best! For me I was even getting wary, my shower invites are going out this week and it's on oct 17th, i felt that was short notice..so personally I wouldn't be comfortable with it..but I'm someone that likes knowing these things in advance, so maybe they will feel okay with it....ask another family member for their take on it.

I went to a wedding last summer where everyone was from out of town. The bride had a "Ladies Brunch" the day before the wedding and put "gifts not necessay" on the invite. Everyone who was in town came and had a great time. I would say three quarters of the people brought a gift or a card despite her request. I thought it was a great time and was a good way to meet some other guests before the big event.

I am planning on doing the exact same thing for my scattered group of family and friends the weekend of my wedding

Have the shower that you want, and don't worry about what anyone thinks about it. If they don't agree, they won't attend and so be it. Your circumstances are different, so as such, it would be handled differently than the norm. Don't worry about that the future SIL thinks.

I like Ellen's idea... when I hear "shower" I automatically think gifts... which is fine, but when it's the day before a wedding that seems a little odd to me. "Ladies Brunch" sounds nice, you can still get everyone together, and then there's no pressure to bring a gift... but if they want to, then of course they could still do so.

I have learned that in the end there are NO rules to this road to marriage. You do everything according to your liking

My sis-n-law had one the night before as well. They were having a destination wedding and towards the end of the dinner rehearsal that we were having at the hotel we turned it into a brial shower. The ladies drifted away to another room and gave the bride her special undivided attention. She loved it!

I am having a partial destination wedding...My Mom and Grandma are coming out 2 days before the wedding...so we aren't doing my bridal shower the day before...but 2 days before =) I think its a GREAT idea...to be able to include the people you'd REALLY want there.

The majority of our guests travelled for the wedding, so I had my bachelorette Thursday night, my shower Friday morning, my rehearsal and dinner Friday evening, and the wedding Saturday, and everything was fine.

The only real question is whether you'll have the ability to get the shower presents home with you. If you can't, you could still have a party, but I'd call it something other than a "shower," because that implies that the main purpose is to give you gifts. But if you can get presents home, you can have a shower.

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Did you have any issues with people being upset about getting you bridal shower gifts, and a wedding gift?

I am in the same situation as you. ALL of my family lives out of state. It only makes sense to have my bridal shower a couple days before the wedding because that's when all of them will be in town. I think this will be the new norm. Don't feel bad about it. You do what's best for your situation. I think it will be fun times to have all the women in your family come together before the wedding. They will enjoy it. Just do it!

View Quoted Comment I have been invited to showers that say please no gifts just gc only because the bride lives out of state.