I'm having the secretary at my school where I work officiate my wedding. She says that she will do it for no charge. Of course we are going to get her a gift card or something?. How much should I spend?
My officiant was also a teacher - but she and her husband went through the process and became ordained and then ran a wedding business on the side/weekends. She was also a dear friend who didn't charge (she really wanted to do it since she was there when he proposed) and refused payment. So we gave her a $100 gift card to a restaurant for a date night with her husband.
@jessica b that sounds like a reasonable amount to me too. I'm of the UO that the officiant can be someone known to the couple or even a friend. I personally would not want a stranger marrying my FH and I. It means a lot that the pastor doing our ceremony knows us and cares about us. Should you be extra cautious about who you pick and consider their experience, character, etc? Well yeah. But I'm not going to leave a shitty worded comment to you ASSUMING that you did none of the above.
I would rather take advice from Celia who officiates weddings as her PROFESSION but sure, go ahead and call her rude instead of heeding her advice to hire someone legitimate.
Kids these days, smh.
Celia Milton ·
I'm not being rude, I'm being realistic.
@Kay, you have a great situation; you have a pastor who knows you which is terrific. Ideally that pastor is good at doing weddings. But just choosing a friend because they're a friend?
That's like choosing a friend to do your root canal or replace your brakes.
I think you should whatever you way to do. I've learned that this whole process can have everyone that don't need to be involved, involved. I think it's super cool to have your friend/secretary of school do it, plus she's done it already. You can give her your script etc..and $100 is a nice gift. Wish you the best!
I think $100 is a good amount. My mom is an ordained minister and is doing my wedding. My fiancé also got ordained and did his twin bother wedding. There is nothing wrong with having a friend do it as long as it's what you want.
Don't listen to @celia. As people keep telling me it's your day!! Do what you feel is best.
I also work at a wedding venue and the bride and grooms are always doing different things these days.
Good luck and congratulations!
Celia Milton ·
The people who are telling you it's your day are wrong.