Not Inviting My Father to the Wedding....

I don't know about "Wrong", but are you ready to fully cut him out of your life entirely forever? Because by not inviting him that's what you're doing, you are putting a final end to any type of future relationship or even polite conversations with him. I had a similar situation, bio-father left when I was a a baby and I haven't had much to do with him at all. I did invite him just as a guest since he is obviously an immediate relative so why not? I don't regularly see every aunt that I invited either. I'm glad I did it. Of course he didn't get any of the "father of the bride" duties or acknowledgment, but since he will always be my father I felt like it was fine for him to watch me get married and to show him the woman that I have become despite his lack of involvement. I don't see how who's paying for it matters, unless your mother and step father have requested that he not be there.It seems like NOT invited him is a bigger deal and more of a statement than just letting him be there.

I agree with laura show him the beautiful women you have become without his help and father duties. i have the same problem i am inviting him to wedding but in my mind he wont come so thats how i will keep it if he does come then good for him. You will show him he didn't have to be around to have his little girl grow into a respectful women.Let him feel what he missed out on all these past years.

Invite him.....unless there's some harm that can come from it, it could be something you possible regret down the road. I just talked to my bio-father for the first time in 25 years, yes I said 25 years, last week. He had the nerve to ask me if he could walk me down the aisle in 9 months. I was just honest and said I wouldn't feel comfortable with that but he was more than welcome to come. It was awkward for me to have even been asked, but it would have been more awkward to let him walk me down. He said, well I have 9 months to earn the right. UUUUUHhhhhhh, still NO!

Ah, detailedplanner, that reminds me of my parernal grandma. My parents didn't want anyone at the hospital when I was born (Besides maternal g-ma, since I was a c-section and dad's squeamish) and my dad's mom can storming in yelling "THAT'S MY GRANDDAUGHTER AND I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE HERE!!" She also did this when one of her daughters decided to elope very privately and didn't want anyone there (they had lived together forever, and their kids were starting to ask about the wedding). This woman has had absolutely no involvement in my life ever since, and I can guaruntee you that she had no intentions of being more involved after that day, but because it was a milestone occasion, she had to be front and center. Same goes for my wedding with her.

I think it would cause more harm than good to not invite him, but I would only invite him as a guest.

I know how you feel. My father and I are not very close. In fact, at this time he is refusing to come to my wedding. He is still invited and I hope and pray that he will come. Though, I have planned to still have a special dance with my father is he does come. My mother and step-father who raised me are walking me down the aisle. Would you be okay if he wasn't there? Just don't do anything that you might regret later. I hope and pray that it all works out for you.

I don't want to invite my father either. I go to all of the family functions for his side, but I haven't seen or talked to him in 5 years. I feel like it would be equivalent to inviting somebody I was friends with in High School but haven't talked to since. I wouldn't even consider it except he is for the first time in 8 years coming to a family reunion which happens to be a month before the wedding and it would be ridiculously awkward if he was the only person in his family *not* invited.

Now I feel like I have to invite him, but I still don't want that drama and stress on my wedding day.