Not enjoying wedding planning

So sorry about the situation. Put planning on hold for the moment. Do you have any support system in addition to fiancé? Is fiancé not wanting to help plan? If you have major vendors lined up, then there is nothing else you need to do at this point. On the flip side, is it too late to eat the deposits and elope together and go out to lunch after? That is also an option if it will alleviate stress levels. Also look into a therapist to help you navigate everything when finances are better.



Otherwise put in job applications and resumes everywhere even if you think you don’t qualify and go from there.

I'm sorry to hear about the pressure you're under. I think more people have been in your position than you imagine. Because the ultimate responsibility to pay is the couple's these days, it can put them under enormous financial pressure if they want a traditional wedding. After all, this was something historically paid for by parents who were typically in a better position to afford it. And when they couldn't the wedding would be something small or simple. When something like a job loss or unexpected expense comes along at this stage, it's incredibly stressful all by itself even without the added cost of a wedding. Is there any chance you can postpone or downsize?

There are month-long lulls in wedding planning where you're just paying installments and waiting for your dress to come in. During those days, can you pick up a gig type job? My friend had great steady work walking dogs with companies that had an owner Apps for tracking. If you go on jogs with them and therefore accumulate longer distances you get paid more (and maybe tipped more). There's also overnight retail holiday work which provides most consecutive hours with none of the customer stress. Apply now.

In the meantime, continue to emphasize your skillset in resumes and coverletters and have them reviewed by others. Watch free webinars on career transitions and self-esteem. I second the other poster to still apply for jobs you think may be a reach. Certain genders historically don't apply to positions if they're not a 100% match, but other genders still apply to them! So don't take yourself out of the running. In your head and out loud, put on repeat that you are the type of employee employers want. At home, check in periodically with your partner on your activities and assure each other that you are a team and will continue to be so in the future. I don't kow what you're bickering about but it may be transferrence. If it's major, don't be afraid to talk it out and build trust during these hard times. Good luck with everything.

Hello! I just said yes and haven’t started planning in earnest yet, but I’m also concerned about unwanted stress as I am in the midst of a career change and we will be moving from a big city to a nearby suburb during the planning. I agree with another poster’s sentiment about taking breaks from planning and focusing on gig work and professional development. Even getting hired for and completing small jobs will build up your confidence and faith in yourself as well as improving your financial bottom line, which may take some stress off if you have wedding related fiscal obligations. Focusing on one thing at a time and feeling good about what you’re doing each day may make planning may seem less insurmountable and more fun again! Also meditation and yoga are great stress reducers and there are a ton of at home videos you can do for free! I wish you tons of comfort and peace and lots of open communication and teamwork between you and FH 💜