Be patient with me. This post is long. I just needed to get this off my heart and into the universe.
On Saturday, I sent a text to all my bridesmaids. I told them I no longer wanted them to participate in the wedding party. It has been stressful trying to get some of the ladies to agree, participate, and just accept my vision for my wedding.
My one cousin has been child-like with any simple request given...hair accessories, makeup, dress fitting appointments, etc. She and I had a long conversation prior to me asking her to be a bridesmaid. I explained I didn't want her attitude she gave to her sister (my other cousin) during her wedding. She stated that's just her demeanor, but she would feel offended if I didn't ask her to participate.
My other cousin (sister to the one above) has been a challenge too. She and I are very close, so I thought she would be "team wedding". However, because her marriage is on the verge of divorce only after one year, she and I have constantly bumped heads. She has basically dictated to me how I should plan my wedding, according to her wedding. I explained to her I have my vision and I'd prefer her support, not her dictations. After some back and forth disagreements, she finally explained to me she couldn't express joy for me cause her marriage is depleted after only one year.
My best friend of almost 10 years continues to always disappoint me whenever I need her. The latest (relating to the wedding) is her inability to attend a dress appointment a whole 6 weeks away because of an issue that has not been confirmed yet. It wouldn't have been so bad had she called 2 weeks prior, but the fitting is a whole 6 weeks away. She still has ample time to make arrangements for the pending issue that hasn't even been confirmed yet. She has me seeing her never able to support me as usual when needed. Our friendship is one-sided.
My future sister-in-law is a non-participate bridesmaid ever. She doesn't answer texts, nor emails. I have sent her personal texts pleading her to respond to both, but still crickets. She accepted the offer to be a bridesmaid, but I get nothing from her. She's the one person I will make accommodations for but her lack of response gives me pause.
As I type this, I am now minus 4 bridesmaids. I never knew my chance at love would expose how others really felt about me or towards me.
