No sit down dinner ?

We are having the same situation with our reception. We've been to tons of weddings where the food serving was too slow or we ended up sitting with people we didnt' know. I've read some posts before and people will urge and mandate you to have a seating chart or enough seating for everyone or else it causes chaos..blah blah blah.

We are having 165 guests and our venue will have seating for approx. 80-90 people. We'll have apetizers passed around during cocktail hour along with serving stations during the actual reception. We will however have one table "reserved" and that will be for our older guests just to make sure they have seating.

Our set up will be 8-10 round tables with seating for about 10 and 6 or so high tables so that people will have somewhere to sit their drinks.

You absolutely need to have a butt for every chair, at all times. I'm shocked that your wedding planner said you only need enough for 50%.

@soonToBeMrsB Why the heck didn't I think of that, that's so true for the reserved table! Thanks for that idea!

So as of now we have 5 short tables and 10 tall tables so then I guess that will be just fine.

I totally understand about the food and just a big mess so I'm hoping that will help minimize all that nonsense.

I don't know why planners say you need 50% seating. You need a seat for every butt. People park their stuff at tables and chairs - they don't become open for someone else to use. Also, I have seen people stay in their chairs so they don't lose them, which minimizes mingling. I would love to go to a heavy appetizer type reception, but I wouldn't stay long if there wasn't enough seating.

@Emmy but see that's the thing I don't want people just sitting around on the cell phones I want people to be up and interacting with others rather on the dance floor or mingling around the venue. From past weddings I've gone to I always see everyone just wanting to stay seated the whole time. With a little less seating I would think it would be good rotation, if that makes sense.

Are you going to have some standing cocktail tables? That is what we had for our cocktail hour, with just a few seats for those that needed to sit. That way people have a place to set their drinks down while they eat at least.

50% is too low. Think more like 80%. Yes you want people to mingle but you also have to think of their attire. Women in heels, men in jackets ... All those things need to go somewhere. When the number is too low, people start thinking about "saving seats" more than getting up to meet people.

We're having a receptions style rehearsal dinner and there's about 35 people coming, but enough sitting for about 15-20. Obviously, FH and I won't be sitting and I don't expect the BP to sit either. The seating is more for his parents and the families.

You can suggest that by having good music and a nice atmosphere, but you cannot host people poorly. I would not stay long if I could not find a seat. Basically everything @jeleebeenz said

I would have a seat for everyone. My company had a Christmas party that had heavy apps. There were also a bunch of casino games. It would have been a great party, but everyone was confused because there was not enough seating. It was pretty awful. Once people started to leave, it got a little better.

Also, we will be adding to our invites "strolling reception" to follow. Most of my attendees may not have been to that style of reception before so we plan to provide info on what that means, that way they won't be surprised.

I firmly believe everyone needs a chair. What should ladies do with their purse, plate, & wine glass? There is no graceful way to hold all three & manage to eat.

In addition, while you might prefer people to mingle around, it's not really nice to force them. And as a previous poster said, people will not simply eat & give up their chairs. Even if they do get up to mingle most of them will leave their personal stuff to reserve the chair. Especially if there is a shortage!!

I fear you will have many people leave much earlier than they would have.

We had about 40 guests. We did have tables and seats for everyone. We had Moose Munch (flavored popcorn from Harry & David) as favors set at everyone's place. They ate their popcorn and helped themselves to drinks while live music was playing and we were quickly finishing up pictures. Once we arrived we brought out food and served it buffet style. We had meat and cheese trays, bread baskets, sundried tomato penne, antiplasto platters and fruit. Our reception was in the middle of the afternoon, so it made sense to keep it simple. People sat and ate and went around visiting with each other (with live music playing most of the time). It was sweet and simple and everyone had a great time.

Absolutely provide a seat for every butt. Not having enough seats isn't going to encourage people to mingle, it's going to encourage people to leave early.

I went to a wedding last summer that was a lot like what you described--heavy apps, a few traditional tables, standing cocktail tables, then a separate room with like couches (and a whiskey bar--hells yes.) But they had MAYBE enough seating for 50% of the people. Two or three tables were reserved for the bridal party/immediate family. So that left like 5 real tables with 8 seats each for a good 100 people. It. was. awful. A group of my college friends (about 20 of us) took over one 8-top. We ate in shifts, and because of the open bar I "volunteered" to eat last. I was sloppy by the time I even got a morsel of food in my mouth. People were eating on the couches, trying to balance the plates on their laps. I saw people go up to other tables and ask them to get up and leave so they could eat. I saw an older woman leaning against the wall uncomfortably because she couldn't sit. Trust me, she wasn't on the dance floor having a good time. I even saw some people sitting on the floor so they could eat.

Seriously, just have a seat for every person there.

I don't know if I would be thrilled to attend a wedding that only had seating for half. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't stay until the end. I guess I would feel like I didn't have a place I could go if I was tired or just needed to sit down during a song. What do you need to do watch for when people get up and hope they aren't returning? I don't like that idea, but that's just my opinion. Even if there wasn't a seating arrangement I would make sure there were seats for every if they wanted to sit!

You need to have a seat for everyone! I would be offended if I went to a wedding and had to stand because there was not enough seats...

People still chat and mingle when they go to a seated dinner reception. But people need and want to sit down to eat. Who enjoys balancing a purse/clutch, a plate of food, a drink, and then trying to actually eat? People want to set down their purse, jackets, maybe shoes, etc while they hit the dance floor. Seat for every butt.

I agree you should have a seat for every person. If I got to a reception and couldn't find a seat to put my purse and jacket at I'd probably leave. Plus I don't like to stand and eat at the same time.

We are having a cocktail/cake reception, then going to a restaurant with those who would like to join us - so the dinner part is optional for them. We are having 50 guests, so it is small enough that it is easy to mingle with others.