No-shows at wedding

View Quoted Comment If someone is skeptical about coming due to the virus they should not rsvp yes regardless how far in advance it is. if i rsvped yes i would have to be 100% certain i would come no matter what happens. so yes i wouldnt speak to them.

View Quoted Comment I feel you on this. It seems like with Covid, people think it’s acceptable for simple courtesy to go out the window. If they don’t at least tell you they aren’t going to come, and give some kind of gift considering you already paid for them to be there, it’s rude.

View Quoted Comment Things could literally change days before that make them unable to attend. They could have easily come in contact with the virus right beforehand and now aren't comfortable attending.

View Quoted Comment Things are literally changing every day which is why people you chose to continue with their weddings should be understanding.

View Quoted Comment Yes that what hurts the most. The common courtesy of letting us know ahead of time canceling. I think it’s almost expected to have last minute cancelations for weddings but covid threw all etiquette out the door.

View Quoted Comment Correct. Which is why I said that they should at least tell you, rather than no show, and give a gift if they had previously RSVP’d yes.

View Quoted Comment Exactly! It is very sad. I wish it wasn’t that way.

View Quoted Comment I personally would only rsvp yes if i knew i was coming regardless how bad it gets. i wouldnt rsvp based on the current situation knowing that things change everyday. there are some people who simply dont care what happens and will come either way and people who change their mind every day. if someone is that unsure they should rsvp no and let the bride and groom invite someone in their place who will come for certain

View Quoted Comment Exactly. people use it as an excuse now. i would never just not show up to something. i would have to be literally be in the hospital incapacitated otherwise i will always find a way to get somewhere. if someone doesnt have the decency to even tell you theyre not coming its definitely rude and theyll do it again. nothing i hate more than people u cant rely on and thats why id kick them out of my social circle

View Quoted Comment What if they got Covid? You'd still want them to attend? It is very possible that someone who 100% planned on attending could get sick or be near someone who is sick and decides not to attend because of this. Based on your profile your wedding was at the height of Covid. In fact, I lost my job days before your wedding because of Covid. I certainly wouldn't have been able to attend a wedding if it wasn't near me because I wouldn't have had the money. I think you are being way too harsh.

View Quoted Comment What if reason was they were laid off and didn't have the money to attend or buy a gift? I was fired from my job days for the poster's wedding so I wouldn't have had the money to buy a gift or attend if it required traveling and staying overnight. A lot of people lost jobs because of this. Or what if the person was sick? I had a couple not attend my wedding because they were sick. Their son was a groomsman so when we noticed they weren't in attendance we asked him why. His mom had a really bad cold for days. This was pre-Covid. If someone was sick I definitely wouldn't want them at my wedding.

View Quoted Comment What are you talking about my wedding didnt happen yet!? do you not know how to do math. if someone got covid thats a different story OBVIOUSLY wouldnt want them to attend. but thats not a no show. a no-show is someone saying theyre going to be there and then not showing up without an explanation or a phone call. you dont just wake up with covid. and if you wake up sick then u need to call and say youre not coming. plain and simple.

View Quoted Comment Anyone who doesn’t attend after they RSVP Yes, especially if it is within 1-2 weeks of a wedding when final counts of are due and balances are paid, should give something to the couple. There is NO reason to no-show without even the courtesy of a call, text or email. I have had 3 cancellations this week, one week before my wedding, and none of them have been because they lost their job or they are sick. This is my opinion from my own personal experience. If it wouldn’t upset you, great, but I agree with the PP...my relationship with these individuals will never be quite the same.

View Quoted Comment No reason to be rude. Your profile says your wedding was in March so none of us have no way of knowing you changed your wedding date. You might want to update it on your profile. You can have Covid for weeks without knowing until you start to have symptoms. Once someone is experiencing symptoms they should be tested. It takes a couple of days to get their results back. In the mean time they have no idea if they actually have Covid or they could come in contact with someone who does. If they find out they are sick they should call ahead of time, but if are really sick they might feel up to calling. We invited a couple and the wife started not feeling well a few days before the wedding. She was hoping to feel better by the wedding. She woke up the morning of the wedding feeling worse than she had the days before so she decided not to come. She didn't notify us ahead of time and it honestly wouldn't have made a difference because we had already paid for her to attend. Her son was one of my husband's groomsmen so when we didn't see her and her husband at the wedding we asked if his mom and stepdad were okay and he told us she was sick. Unfortunately, these things happen. Another person didn't attend because an emergency came up. Emergencies happen. The assistant to our hair dresser also couldn't be there to help the hair dresser for our wedding because of a family emergency. I really do believe you are being too harsh, but if you want to possibly ruin a relationship because you can't understand that sometimes things happen that are out of our control then that's up to you.

View Quoted Comment Im not even gonna read what you wrote because no where on my profile does it say my wedding was in march. youre probably looking at the wrong profile

View Quoted Comment I had several no shows, but I'm not going to hold that against them forever. My husband's aunt we knew there was a very good possibility she might not be able to attend, but she still rsvp'd yes. My mother-in-law informed me right before the wedding that her sister wouldn't be attending because the aunt's daughter-in-law was told she only had weeks to live because her cancer was quickly spreading. The next time she saw us she literally broke down in tears because she felt so awful for missing our wedding. I would never hold it against her that she didn't attend our wedding. It was more important for her to be there with her close family as her daughter-in-law was dying then it was for her to be there for our wedding. A close family friend lost their mom days before our wedding. She was so overcome with grief that she didn't speak to anyone for days so we didn't know she wasn't attending. All we knew was her mom had been sick. We didn't even know she passed away days beforehand. Sometimes there are circumstances beyond their control. As for me when I lost my job, I was very upset. Some of my friends still don't know I'm unemployed and I've been unemployed for almost three months because of Covid. I haven't said anything because it isn't an easy conversation to have. Holding a grudge will only cause you to ruin these relationships.

View Quoted Comment I was looking at the original poster's profile. My apologies. But if you want to hold a grudge be my guest, but don't be surprised when you lose relationships over this.

View Quoted Comment Yea thats the point. i dont want people like that in my life. im open to losing those relationships and id be glad to reduce my social circle.

View Quoted Comment The beauty of this forum is that it allows people to ask advice, and for people to reply and offer varying opinions, ideas, etc. We can just agree to disagree on this one. I don’t have to be okay with something just because you are okay with it. Again...we both feel the way we do because of personal experiences, and our personal experiences have clearly been very different.

View Quoted Comment That sounds pretty harsh. What if a guest who initially Rsvp-Ed yew started experiencing Covid symptoms several days before your wedding?