No bridal party, how to involve loved ones so they still feel more included

Is it possible to just ask the two friends to be bridesmaids? My sisters are my two bridesmaids and while I would have loved to ask my 4 closest friends, FH just emigrated to the US and I can't bring myself to have 6 people standing with me and he has no one. To include my friends, I've asked them to do readings or participate in other ways with the Mass/ceremony.

I'm not having a bridal party as well. But my SIL has volunteered to assist me the day of. She will help me get dressed , hold my bouquet while we are saying our vows and what not. I honestly don't want a BM but if I did pick one it would be my SIL. I'm closer to her than my own sister . Then since my FH is having his brother as his best man I could make her a " honorary bridesmaid" .

Just ask them to be bridesmaids. I understand the whole not wanting to lock your friends into having to spend money, but i think it is confusing and a little insulting to have "non-bridesmaids"......either have them or dont.

If a friend of mine said that they want me to be included but not a BM, I would feel like she didn't think we were close enough to be a BM. Which would make me feel weird. I would tell people sooner than later that you aren't having a bridal party, and invite close people to a small amount of things Like, I get asking them to come look at wedding gowns if you need someone to go, but not much else. FH or a coordinator should help you with anything else.

Is your wedding date correct?

I didn't ask my BM for any help. They aren't working for your wedding! My mom helped me do things like put together the welcome bags. If you need help, ask your FH (it's his wedding too).

If you want someone to get ready with you, you certainly can invite them to be with you as you get primped and get dressed, even though they aren't bridesmaids. You could also ask them to go dress shopping with you, go to a wedding expo, etc. if you want to do those things with others.

ETA: I see your wedding is in a month. What do you need "help" with? Its way too late now to ask anyone to be a BM as OPs have suggested.

Nope.

I updated the wedding date to September (was a placeholder when I signed up). My comment didn't post last night....

We are not having a bridal party because fiance prefers not to, there's not one person he wants to ask to be a best man, and he wants it simple like a friends' wedding we attended where they did not have a bridal party.

When I say "help" i meant involvement in general. I want to include them in activities but not require them to do the typical wear matching dresses, spend a lot of money, deal with different opinions and drama.

I want them to know that even though we're not having a bridal party, them being involved with the little things means the world to me. (saying this because I do think some of them expected to be a BM/MOH). I don't need "help" in any one specific thing, I guess I'm going for the no/less drama route but not sure how to get them involved and let them know their importance.

I'm not having a bridal party and I'm not asking for help. If they offer to help me out than that's a different story. Ask your family to help instead.

I would just explain that you've chosen not to have a formal bridal party, but you appreciate their friendship and you want them to feel involved. I have a semi similar situation, I have a lot of girls that I consider near and dear, fiancé doesn't have the same amount of close guy friends, so we decided to just do family in our BP. My friends will come to my shower and bachelorette and they have been really great about asking how planning is going and offering to help.

You don't ask anyone for help planning your wedding. You can graciously take help if it's offered, hire and pay a professional to help you, or do it yourself.

Your most recently comment sounds more like you just want to ask your two closest friends to be involved, and that's totally fine. I wouldn't give them a title like "unofficial" bridesmaid because I find that weird (and other posters on here do as well, so odds are pretty good that at least one of your friends might as well). You can involve your friends by asking them to do a reading or give a toast at the reception/rehearsal dinner, inviting them to get ready with you the morning of, designating them at the wedding with a corsage, and/or inviting them to things like wedding dress shopping, the bridal shower, and bachelorette party. Just know that in no way are they obligated to attend any of these things and please do not expect them to throw you a shower or bachelorette party (this would be true even if they were "official" bridesmaids).

Maybe they could read something during your ceremony? That's a wonderful way for important people to participate without being a bridesmaid.

I think "help" is throwing people off. Help sounds like you want them to help make decor, help with planning but not honor them.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like you don't want people standing up with you but you want to honor them, invite them to go dress shopping with you, etc? If your help doesn't include "free labor" then I think you're fine.

I guess I would ask them to be personal attendants. Ask them to be with you when you get ready the day of and maybe greet people when they arrive then they can spend the rest of the day as guests. Ask them to wear a black dress or the color of your wedding but it can be something they already own. Don't outline all the things you "expect" them to do. When the time comes you can just say "I'd love you to come dress shopping with me. Would you be okay with that?"

Thanks all. Right, I corrected my "help" statement with "involvement". Will definitly give them gifts and such and of course they are not obligated to do/attend anything they do not want to. We are also not having the bouquet toss or garter thingy, we are not very traditional. We want things simple, drama free, yet fun!

If you are doing family flowers such as corsage or button holes, perhaps you could also give them one. Maybe ask them to do some readings, could one of them be your witness? Also going bridal shopping is a big way to include them. I would let them know what your plans are re bridal party though if you think they are expecting to be asked to be in one.

I'm only having an MOH, but all of my close friends are invited to my dress shopping, showers, bachelorette, rehearsal dinner, and getting ready with me that day.

I never thought of this option until one of my close college friends didn't have a bridal party, and it was fantastic for all of us and we felt just as included as we would've felt as bridesmaids.

I would not give anyone titles, to avoid any confusion. Invite them to all of your festivities, and if you want, they could do readings or something in your ceremony.

View Quoted Comment Bet you're fun at parties.

If it's a true friend, they'll be more than happy to help out. Next time you don't have a recommendation, like she asked for, maybe keep it to yourself. 😉