My indecisiveness is killing me...am I being too picky? (ETA: pics in comments)

FH and I were set on our venue before getting engaged, but we are pretty easy to please. If you're not willing to travel at all, you may have to give up something. What are your must haves?

From the 9 I've seen, I've narrowed it down to 2. But they're both so different and they both have aspects that I love and aspects that I hate. I wish I could merge them together, lol. Idk why this is so hard for me, I wish I was the type of person that could just make a decision and stick with it and not constantly overthink EVERYTHING.

The only venue that we looked at, we knew it was the one. The place is beautiful, but the price was even better (they could honestly charge 4 times more for this place).

If it is a cosmetic flaw that you are worried about, find a way to cover it up. Decor/uplighting/curtains. Is there one that sticks out over others to you?

We can't book our venue until June 1st but we've known we've wanted to be there for a long time.

It is about 3 hours away from us at a lake that has very special meaning to both FH & I. the lake has cabins that are available to rent (for about the same price as a hotel) and since most of our guests would have to get a hotel (all of FH's family is OOT) it's not that much of a difference. I have 3 family members that will have to get a hotel there if they don't want to drive.

We had to give up some things that we would want in order to get this venue, but to us it is worth it.

I can be very indecisive too so I feel your pain. I made a decision early on that I wasn't going to drive myself crazy being too picky with wedding planning, because it can suck all the fun out of it! So, for each thing I have chosen I have done a fair amount of research, narrowed it down and gotten quotes, and then made a decision. I had done a lot of research on reception venues and gotten quotes before ever going to look at one, so it just so happened the first place I went and looked at I loved. So, we went with that place. I think the more options you give yourself the harder it is to choose. I'm sure almost any of the places you are considering would be great, so just narrow it down and go with one! It will all end up great. Don't stress yourself out! You only get to plan your wedding once, so try to enjoy it!

Why don't you talk to us about the two in two separate posts (on this thread) with a pic? Maybe we can help you narrow it down.

Must haves:

- Good food

- Within budget

- Able to seat 150-160 people

Wish List:

- Aesthetically unique (not a ballroom person - but one of my 'Top 2' venues is a ballroom)

- Very close to a hotel or within a hotel (the other one of my 'Top 2' venues doesn't have a hotel within 10 miles)

@GymRat... ok! I'll post each venue in a separate comment down below

I don't think there is ever any perfect option. Make a list of pros and cons for each of the top 2 venues. If you're still undecided, post your lists and you can get some specific advice.

Our venue was kinda set as it has sentimental meaning for me and FH loved the interior when we sent to see it. Major drawback is that it is on the corner of a busy street at the edge of a strip mall. I had my hopes set on some outside pics. My awesome photog found a nature center 3 miles away so we are going to head there for pics.

There are ways to work around obstacles. What are the obstacles on the two you are choosing between?

The first venue we saw have me butterflies. I looked at other venues, but didn't catch my attention. I ended booking the venue that have me butterflies.

Option A:

Pros:

- I love the rustic feel

- Unique, not a typical ballroom which is super common in my area

- Have more options with decor

- Catering options are a bit cheaper than other venue

Cons

- About 15 minutes from the nearest hotel (shuttle options are available, but I really love the idea of just being able to walk to rooms and not have to get in a car or have my guests leave their cars anywhere)

- Not a fan of the industrial ceilings

- Location is not my favorite, in a super busy area with lots of shops and restaurants, so not any place to take pictures around the venue

- No outdoor location for guests to go during cocktail hours, just the parking lot is outside...bleh

Option B:

Pros:

- All inclusive (hotel rooms on site)

- Food will be good (4 star steakhouse is built into hotel and is the only catering option)

- Outdoor patio area for guests during cocktail hour

- Hotel only books one wedding per weekend so I will be the only event going on at the time

- Very close to church (within a few miles)

Cons

- Not a ballroom person typically, super overdone in my area

- HATE the interior, not my aesthetic at all (going for a garden, whimsical wedding)

- Ugly carpet and walls

- Food and bar is a little pricier than other venue, so will have to make cuts elsewhere

My top advice when wedding planning--or just in life, really--there is no such thing as "the one." I think that concept is the #1 thing that trips people up and causes mountains of pointless stress.

There is no "one" dress. There is no "one" venue. There is no "one" caterer or bridesmaid dress or photographer or cake or bouquet or ring or ANYTHING. There. Is. No. "One."

There are only real-world dresses and venues and caterer and everything else. They all have pluses and minuses, like anything else in the real world. You just find one that fits your needs and your budget and where the positive factors outweigh the downsides.

We looked at 3 different venues and well third time was the charm this time! I knew before we even left the venue that it was gonna be the one for us and I didn't have an urge to see anymore places.

It is your wedding day and of course you want it to be perfect! But like everyone else has said compare the 2 you narrowed it down to and maybe go view both of them one more time and then go from there.

@StPaulGal....great point!! I think I have caused myself so much stress bc I've heard from all my friends who are married, "When you find the right reception venue...you'll know". And I haven't experienced that "feeling" yet, so it has made me stress out so much because I'm running out of venues in my area. So thanks for the reassurance and just the overall life advice, something I need to work on, lol

I took my FH along when looking at ceremony venues (as the reception venue was his one request) as we walked through the ceremony location, I still wasn't 100% sure if that was THE place, or if I should have it inside or outside. Well my FH basically decided for me. He told me that it was written on my face, when we walked into the possible venue room, my eyes lit up and he knew that we were having the ceremony there.

So I would take your FH along if you can, he may be able to help with some decisions since he knows you so well.

I think the venue is beautiful. When considering pros and cons, figure out if the cons outweighs the good or the overall bigger picture. I get your reasons for wanting a closer venue but 15 minutes is not bad at all. I completely understand and can relate (indecisiveness) because I am in the same boat! I'm sure whatever you pick will be beautiful and perfect for you, happy planning!

I would ask your photog about photo options for venue a. Seems like the one you like more.

No one will notice the ceilings.

Option A all the way.

Mainly because Option B you mentioned having to cut your budget because it's pricier. Like a married guy told me the other day: SAVE WHERE YOU CAN.

re: no outdoor area for cocktail hour: Where will the cocktail hour be? If you're taking pictures during cocktail hour, don't worry about the guests. Food and bev is the most important for them.

Also, can you find a park to go to for pics? For instance, I'm going to a super popular park/gardens for some first look photos which is about 10 minutes from the venue.

Like Kate said, 15 minutes isn't far - they can get there on their own.