My Father just passed away - i need advice/help/thoughts/prayers

I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine. No one can ever replace your dad. May I make a few suggestions for you?

Reserve a seat in his honor at your wedding, with a framed picture of him. Add a charm with a picture of him/you to your bouquet. Have someone sew a piece of a shirt of his into the inside of your dress. He will be with you on your day in spirit. I’ll pray for your comfort. 💜

I'm so sorry for your loss, I couldn't even imagine how you must be feeling right now. Just remember, whether he's here on Earth or in spirit, your dad will be watching over you on your special day.

I am so sorry for you loss.

I am so sorry for you loss!! It's very hard to take in and deal with when you're in the middle of planning what's supposed to be the happiest time of your life. I hope you find peace and comfort in the middle of this situation.

I lost my mom to breast cancer 12 years ago, we knew she was getting worse and knew she wouldn't make it but it still hurt so bad when it happened. Any kind of passing is horrible but sudden ones are definitely hard. Although it was 12 years ago, it still feels like yesterday a lot of the time especially in moments like these where I need her. But I can't change our story or time all I can do is keep the good memories and always keep hers alive. I'm wearing a pearl necklace that belonged to my mom and doing a memorial picture with 4 roses. Three orange ones to symbolize my siblings and I, and two white ones to symbolize my mom and my grandma, her mom. Who unfortunately also passed from congestive heart failure and collapsed lung this March, same month as my mom. My grandmothers pendant will be on my bouquet.

It's extremely hard because they are a huge part of our lives and growth, these are moments that we capture once in a life time and then we lose them. I can tell you it doesn't get easier, we just get stronger.

Take your time to mourn, put the planning on a brief pause, I did for a month and it helped me, and think of ways that you'd want them to be honored on your special day. Cry multiple times a day if you have to, never hold it in, you need to release those feelings and I'm sure we'll cry but let them be tears of joy because you were loved by them and their care and attention helped lead you to this point in life.

Sending you a virtual hug!

It’s so hard to know the right thing to say in a situation like this because there’s nothing I can say to help or make it better. But I am so deeply sorry for your loss, I can’t even begin to imagine the magnitude of your pain. My heart hurts for you and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

I dont have any advice for you but wanted to extend my deepest sympathies to you and your family. I can't even imagine the pain you're in. You are NOT selfish for wanting your dad with you on your special day. Most girls dream of walking down the aisle with their dad. My FFIL passed away just before we got engaged. Wedding planning has been very bittersweet for my FH. Allow yourself to grieve, cry, get angry. It sounds like your dad was excited for you, your big day and your future. Hold on to that. I believe he'll be with you every step of the way, even beyond your wedding. Look for signs from him. I hope your memories of him warm your heart and bring a smile to you knowing how blessed you were to have had him for as short as you did.

I am so so sorry for your loss. I can’t even imagine.

My condolences to you and your family, this must be a hard time and I can’t imagine what your going through. I’m praying for you all to stay strong and know that your dad will be with you the day you get married maybe not in the way you dreamed but he will be present in your heart and everyone else’s.

I’m so so sorry for your loss!! I know how you feel. My father passed away, I asked myself the same question this was supposed to our special walk together, our special dance. But I decided I will walk down the aisle but I’ll do it alone. I’ll dance our dance. Take your time to heal, cry scream. Your wedding like mine will be hard, lots of tears but also with happiness.

I am so very sorry!! My father passed away 4 days before Xmas 2018. Exactly 6 months ago today. He fought for a rare form of cancer for 3 years and he was told he would live into late Winter 2019 but the cancer was incredibly aggressive. Never got to say goodbye, I was 6100km away and planning to fly home when he just fell on the ground in the middle of the night and died. As I am a few days from getting married, I have been thinking a lot about how Dad isn't here to see me down the aisle or share my proudest moments with me.

Where do you go from here? Everyone's grieving process is different. Someone I know who lost her Mom before told me that "life goes on and so do you" and I believe that now. When I found out in Oct 2018 that the cancer was terminal, I cried everyday and had daily panic attacks - I couldn't see my life without him. I talked to him everyday on the phone more than I talked to my friends, we were very close. But when he died, he wasn't suffering anymore and while I miss him dearly, I could never expect him to continue to bear what he did any longer than he did.

You are not selfish nor sound it. Everything you describe feeling are normal reactions to this kind of life event. Allow yourself to grieve, do nothing for a little while. It is a part of the process. Lean on your partner, family and friends. This time will really tell you who has your back. As time goes on, you will still miss him but things continue to happen in life. For example, I am finishing a degree in the midst of this and I had to keep writing research papers. I had to keep working, planning other important stages of my life. I haven't cried about him in a couple of months now but when he was alive, I imagined I was gonna be a wreck for years after died.

For now, try to be as present minded as you can be. It is so so important to work through these feelings and the grieving process. Don't put a time frame on it or expectations on how to react and by when. Perhaps when things become a bit more steady, you may consider having your mother or brother if you have one or your FFIL, to walk you down the aisle. You may choose to forego it like I will be or you may choose to honour his memory in another way. Please take care of yourself ❤

I’m so so very sorry for your loss. 😢 he will be there with you in spirit watching over you and he will see how beautiful your wedding day will be. My prayers are with you!

So sorry for your lost of your Dad nothing can prepare us for the lost of a love one. Sending prayers and strength to your family.

So sorry for your loss and prayers you and ur family. He will be with u every step of the way. Think good thoughts he wouldn't want you to be sad on ur big day.

I am so very sorry for your loss. I don't think that there is anything that anyone can say right now that will take your pain away just know that it is ok to grieve and to even sound selfish!

As far as your big day goes, try to enjoy it the best you can. Walking down the aisle, you can have your mom walk you down and maybe have her carry a photo of your dad. You can also get a photo charm to add to your bouquet so that he will be right there with you.

I am so sorry for your loss! While not the same, my FH’s Grandmother passed away on Tuesday after a short battle with cancer. She was the person he was the absolute closest to in his entire family and it very hard for us to also picture our day without her, as we were so excited for her to see her first grandchild get married. We are currently thinking of ways to still include her in our special day and are currently thinking about doing a reserved seat for her, or doing a table with a few pictures of all of the people we have lost in our lives. We do not have this option because of her wish to be cremated, but if your dad decided to be buried, maybe set aside time during your day to visit his grave either before or after the wedding. Maybe place a flower from your bouquet there or his boutonnière along with a letter. As PP’s have mentioned, it’s very hard to determine the best way to include them in your wedding that won’t make you too upset, so I would definitely find a way that may memorialize him but not cause you to become too upset and not enjoy your day (if that makes sense). Again, I am so very sorry for your loss.

Sending lots of prayers

My dad passed when I was 16 and I still tear up thinking that he won't be there to walk me down the aisle.

BUT there are ways you can incorporate him... I'm having FH wear a pair of his dress socks, and I will be wearing a family heirloom belt passed down from his side. My mom will be walking me.

Do you have little things like these that can incorporate? It really helps me knowing that I'll still have lil bits of him with me in the wedding.

I’m so sorry for your loss. I can only imagine what you are going through. It is definitely going to add another emotional level to your big day. Can your mom walk with you down the isle so that you are not alone?

ways to help commemorate your dad is adding his picture to a charm or locket on your bouquet. Then symbolically he would be there with you on your walk. Other commemorating options are a saved front row seat, a table with a lantern on it with photo of your lost loved ones.

nothing is going to make this okay. Surround yourself with family and loved ones during this hard time. Lean into your fiancé and know that you’ll get through this.

wish you the best and my condolences.

I am so sorry for your loss. I can not even imagine the pain that you must be feeling. I agree with the PP, I think your father would want you to still get married and have the beautiful wedding you guys envisioned. If anything, you're doing it in honor of him. A close friend of mine lost both of her parents within eight months of each other. Her mother passed literally one month before the wedding. She had her brother walk her down the aisle and she danced with her uncle. Her aunt gave a speech and it was so beautiful. The whole day was super emotional for everyone, but with each other's support and love it was beyond joyous. I'll pray for you and your family.

So sorry for your loss.

Im so very sorry for your loss. I don't have any advice, but I just wanted to send you and your family my condolences.