My dad refuses to do the daddy daughter dance.

Maybe explain to him that it's very important to you to have this dance, and maybe you can have your FH and his mom dance together at the same time, and maybe the bridal party also, so the focus isn't entirely on you and him.

Maybe you could talk to him about it and tell him its very important to you? He might make an exception for this one time since you are his daughter. Or maybe he woud be more comfortable if you FH danced with his mom at the same time to take some pressure off of him being in the complete spotlight.

HAHA @ FMS!!! Same idea at the same time!!

Lol..great minds think alike Gidge!

Ironically I was just thinking about this last night. I just discovered last year that my dad is actually very shy which amazed me b/c he is so silly and fun-loving. So I need to make it a point to speak to him about the dance and also about giving the welcome at the reception.

I know it's your special day but put yourself into dad's shoes for a moment. How would you feel if somebody tried to force you into something you were completely terrified of totally ignoring YOUR fears b/c it's important to THEM? No doubt your dad knows how important your wedding is to you. You don't need to explain that to him. And if he's still refusing you have to know this is a HUGE fear for him.

Alternative solution? Perhaps a photo slide show with pics of you & dad while a special song is playing. Maybe your mom can help you gather some pics?

Maybe do two dances at the same time mother/son as well so that he's not feeling quite as center of attention

Is this important to you? I agree with PP but also like Ladylee's idea of the slideshow if he still wont dance. This will still point out how important he is to you.

I'm not having one. A lot of people don't. Neither my dad nor I want to do it! And honestly, doing a LOT of special dances gets boring for your guests. I would have him walk you down the aisle if it means a lot to you and then just let it go.

OMG HP ur sooo negative on everything you post.

I was gonna just get married in vegas but the father daughter dance is what made me want to do it with family there. My dad means so much for me and ever since I was little I would get teary eye'd when I'd see the father daughter dance. If you can convince your dad to do it I think that's be awesome!!! Good luck on that I know how important that is =)

Talk to him about it! and i agree with pp, maybe tell him youll start it off as a father?daughter dance, and then have people join so the spotlight wont be on you two. youll still get your dance, and maybe a pic and some video of it, but then itll make ur dad feel better. if theres alot of family thats going to attend, maybe ask all the fathers to come onto the dance floor with their wives or daughters!

I guess it kind of depends on how strongly your dad is opposed to dancing and whether he can be talked into it or not. If he can't, I like the slide show idea, or maybe a special toast. I do kind of agree with HPFanatic in a way, the "special dances" are very nice and meaningful for the couple getting married, but your guests won't miss them if they don't take place.

Awww cute idea Devine... I might have to steal one of these ideas because my dad and I are both kinda shy and kinda awkward when it comes to slow dances... I already have to deal with the spotlight for the first dance, another dance with all eyes on me is too much haha.

Lol thanks nicole! ive already thought about doing that cuz i hate being the center of attention! my dad probably would like it too cuz hes already admitted that hes gonna end up crying like a baby! so i might do that too...

My FH and I will be combining our parent dances. That way it does drag on and our folks dont feel too much pressure.

I would talk to him about it maybe. But if he really isn't wanting to do it then I would go with ladylee's idea and maybe do a slideshow. Or maybe see if he is up to doing it if their are others around.

I have talked to him and i thought it was important to me but i really want him to enjoy the night. He is totally against any aspect of it and does not plan on dancing at all during the wedding. He wants to hang out with the family and catch up with everyone. I love the slideshow idea! I will talk to my mom and are venue about that. I think the big thing to me now is i have just never personally seen it skipped and i thought i was the only one in this boat. Thanks for all the suggestions!

I also have never attended a wedding where the Honors Dances with the parents are skipped. Many people are extremely uncomfortable with dancing especially in the spotlight for the very first time. The Father/Daughter dance is an honor and way to pay homage to the joy and unity you have shared your whole life. Just going out there unprepared and doing the high school prom sway is awkward for everyone involved and for this reason I can sympathize with your father. However, if he and you take one hour of instruction it will empower both of you to feel confident and look elegant. The lesson itself will also be a treasured memory for both of you. In fact, bring your camera to capture the fun!

Maybe do a slideshow instead the dj could announce it with "instead of doing a dance (your real name) and her father have decided to put together a slideshow of some of there memories together" i think it would be a sweet alternative

See if he'll do it if you have your D.J cut the song? I'm shy also & only like to dance with a crowd. Don't get me wrong I can dance. I just hate all eyes on me. I'll be cutting our songs or having ppl join in the dance thro out the songs

Adding additional dancers, fading and cutting the song short will help to take the spotlight off you and your Dad. He only needs to be out there 10-15 seconds or so for the symbolism and pictures. I mention to the brides that your sense of time will likely be distorted during your reception. Your Dad may actually enjoy this dance once you get started and he realizes that he doesn't need to dance for very long. You may also consider having some other special men in your life cut in on your Dad as symbolic of their support to you and him. One recent wedding (and this was not planned) had the father of the groom cut in on the father of the bride, who was not keen on dancing. I found this to be very touching, as kind of a "welcome to the family" symbolism and providing additional support to the bride.

Dan