Moving in

My FH & I have lived together for 2 years now, been engaged for 1. I'm 26 & he's 24. I would definitely recommend moving in together before you're married. I can't imagine not living with my FH now. It was very scary at first.

My fiancé and I moved in together after 6 months of dating. I have never been one to move so quickly, but I guess when you know... you just know. It was the best decision we could have made for our relationship. We have grown so close and really got to know each other in different ways. I know his spending habits, what chores he doesn't mind and the ones he does, how to cheer him up when he's upset, what the best way to navigate confrontation with him is, and so many other things. Here we are engaged shortly after our one year anniversary ❤️
My advice is if you feel ready then do it. Just make sure to be open minded and communicate. Not everyone lives the way you do, and he may have habits that you didn't know would drive you nuts... and vice versa. If you don't feel ready quite yet then just communicate that to him. Waiting until after you two are married has its benefits as well. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a relationship. Whatever works, works.

My fiancé and I have been together for 5 years now, we are 23 years old and moved in together about a year and a half ago! We LOVE it and believe it has helped build a solid foundation for our marriage. We will have lived together for 3 years by the time we get married!

I feel like it's always better to live together before you get married. My fiance and I have been living together for a year, and while I love him, I found out he does a lot of stuff that annoys me. You could end up realizing you hate living with them before you get married lol. But in all seriousness my personal opinion is to experience it before making the lifelong commitment of marriage

My FH and I moved into the same dorm room when we were 22 after I had a falling out with my room mate spring semester of senior year. After that, we lived together for another five years. I wouldn’t have done it any other way. It’s crucial to know that you’re compatible in the same living space before you make a lifelong commitment to each other.

He moved into my condo when his lease was up which was about 6 months before he proposed. I can't imagine marrying someone that I don't know if I can live with. Being together and spending the night is soooo much different than actually living with someone.

I moved in with my FH after about two years of dating and were living together for about a year when he proposed. We both see living together as an important test and if we hadn’t been living together he probably would have waited until we were to ask me to marry him. Living with someone shows you all sides of that person, something we definitely didn’t want to find out and not like after the fact. He’s 32 and I’m 26 (31 and 25 doing my first year teaching when I moved in), so I get the hesitancy about not feeling established as an adult but it’s been great!

Please move in with him before you get married. I’ve lived with 3 guys between 23 and now (29) and I would have married the first two but after living with them I had to leave. I almost even left my current fiancé after living with him at first, I love him dearly but it is so different to live with a man. And staying over 7 nights a week is not the same as sharing an address. I’m not talking about little habits, people always think it’s just the dishes or the hairs in the sink and it’s no big deal. Negotiating space and finances and having nowhere else to go when you have an argument can really show you someone’s true colors. My friend wouldn’t live with her husband until they were married and she very soon wanted a divorce. They’re still together but she’s seriously not sure if she can do this forever. Then if you work everything out and you want to marry them, that’s wonderful and you’ll be so much stronger for it.

I went to high school with my fiancé and we moved to the same town for college. Though I had my own apartment, I basically lived with him my first year of college. Let me tell you, we went at it constantly but that had a lot to do with us growing up as well. Since college, we have been living together and it’s honestly been great! We’re considerate of each other’s space but also get to enjoy day to day quality time that you normally wouldn’t experience living separately. While it’s “unorthodox”, I personally prefer it this way. I think it’s honestly what you want! We didn’t officially move in together until after we were engaged and even then, my parents do not agree. All about personal preference!

I moved in with my husband about 5 years before being married. We moved in knowing that we wanted to get married after we were both financially stable (I was working full-time again after grad school).

I do think there are some factors to the marriage statistic. Mainly: 1) it's a trial run and people learn they're not really compatible that way, so they breakup before making a mistake 2) they're not both married-minded, so one person (or both) doesn't treat the relationship like a marriage.

Honestly my husband moved in to my place only after like a month and a half of dating. We've been living together ever since. It's been 4.5 years now

View Quoted Comment Did everything work out when you found out he does stuff that annoys you? What did you guys do about it?

View Quoted Comment That’s very true. You were able to just communicate well enough with him to work everything out?

We've lived together for about 6 months but living apart now because of jobs. I'm glad we lived together before getting married.

My FW and I were very close friends for about a year before we got together (just friendly acquaintances for years before that), but we learned so much about each other in our own place together. For us we didn't have too many surprises but it still let us see those things you will only notice when together in your own home. I think even if you've spent a lot of time together, there is nothing as revealing as living together. Good luck whatever you decide.

FH and I have been living together for 8 years. You can’t hide who you are when you live with someone, eventually they’ll see your gross or annoying habits and you’ll see theirs. This will either make you stronger or break your relationship but it’s better to do it now before you have legal ties to that person. You know nobody’s perfect, taking the rose tinted glasses off you see your future spouse as the person they will be after you’ve married, good or bad.

FH found out I’m a slob that leaves my favorite tea cup sitting around too often. I found out FH has awful night terrors. For us none of those things were a deal breaker, but it was good to find out for ourselves.

If you’re getting married you’re going to be moving in together eventually, so the apprehension seems odd to me(but everyone is different, so who knows.) Personally, my FH and I are moving back in together one December once my lease is up. I feel like it’s better to be sure you can stand living together before taking the dive into marriage. Some people have an amazing relationship when they can get time away from each other at their individual homes, and then it all falls apart when they actually start living together, and that time apart is harder to come by.

View Quoted Comment That is one thing I’m worried about. We are both very introverted and like having plenty of time to our selves. He has his own apt and I live home with my mom. I like being alone in my room all the time and he likes being alone in his apt a lot but of course he doesn’t mind when I come over. We will have a big house, with plenty of rooms and space, so we’ll still always be able to find time to ourselves. Do you think everything will be ok?

View Quoted Comment Speaking generically (as I do not know you) it is possible, but hard to know. If there is a lot of space in the house, and plenty of rooms you may find it works for you to each have your own (my FIL’s sleep in separate rooms and it works for them to get some time apart) living together will likely be a huge adjustment for you guys. Especially if you’re used to spending a lot of time in your respective homes alone. From what I’ve heard, newlywed life is extremely difficult to adjust to under the best circumstances, so it’ll likely be a rough transition whether you get the living together part or if the way now or later.

View Quoted Comment So first I went to a counselor who helped me with some personal issues that were making me unhappy. But her solution to communicating better was just do it. Which did not help me lol. Then I started reading and listening to relationship therapy work by Pat Allen and it changed my life. I can’t believe all the mistakes I made before I knew about her work. I am a different person now and my fiancé doesn’t even know about it but he responds perfectly because it works. But the final thing that fixed it was moving into a new apt that was both of ours, not just his old apartment. No more issues with space or memories from exes or arguments, it was fair/neutral ground.