Mother of the bride/groom dresses

My MIL had been buying dresses early on in the year for my october wedding and found what she's wearing I think a month or two ago and my mother hasn't even looked! Complete extremes. My mother just asked me again what color my MIL is wearing so she doesn't match, but doesn't clash with her, doesn't clash with my fiance since he's not in a neutral color and is wearing burgundy or my bridesmaids. I personally don't care what colors they wear as long as it's not the same color as him or the wedding party lol.

But I get it. Family can definitely be difficult when wedding planning

Darker colors are a popular pick as they don't wash people out. Lots of photographers recommend against guests wearing really light colors or clothing that has a lot of white in it, even if the whole "don't wear white" thing isn't something you're worried about, as it can make pictures afterwards look wonky due to lighting, camera flashes, etc. and requires a lot of editing.

Maybe advise her to look into dresses that are within your color scheme but not what your bridesmaids are wearing. Generally speaking, navy, plum, dark grey/ silver, and mauve are common MOB/ MOG dress colors.

My MIL did this for a while. She like waited 4 months or so after we got engaged then went NUTS about details. We had a 2 year engagement, so it was waay too early to know anything. I eventually said "I don't know" enough that she gave up. Our colors are navy and burnt orange and our moms are both wearing burgundy (not planned, they just ended up going with the same color and they've both claimed they don't mind that they match). They went into appointments looking for dresses in darker jewel tones that would look good with either colors. Really, unless you have family members in the wedding party that they won't want to clash with, they can really wear anything they feel comfortable in.

If your mom doesn't care about the whole "bride's mom should find a dress first" thing, then just let your MIL shop for dresses. Right now summer stuff is on sale, so she might be trying to find something at a good deal. As long as they're in agreement with the formality of the dresses then they'll both fit in enough if that's what she's worried about.

Aww she's probably just excited and maybe even nervous about finding the right dress. My mom and his mom actually decided to go together to find dresses it was super fun! I didn't really have much a preference to what they wear though, they knew the wedding colors and then just picked complimentary colors. If you have preferences to long, midi, short dresses and color you don't want them to wear a specific color make sure to tell her. At this point I d probably just say my mom hasn't gone dress shopping yet she s waiting for me to find my dress first. And then when she does find one let her know. Good luck to you!

My FMIL did this as well, though not quite to the extreme that I think you're dealing with, but she wanted to know what color my mom was wearing. I gave neither woman much guidance, other than requesting that they pick a color that isn't the same as anyone in my wedding party. I'm not a fan of the mothers matching in the wedding party personally - my brother's MIL did this at his wedding, she wore the same color as the MOH with a dress from the same store, but was actually a LOT nicer than the MOH's in my opinion. And to me it just looked wrong.

My wedding party is in dark jewel tones, and so the mothers are keeping with that for our wedding. My mother will be in a beautifully saturated navy and my MIL is going with a beautiful plum - that way they're keeping with the tone of the wedding, without looking like they are trying to be in the wedding party. Maybe go with the same idea?

If your wedding colors are say - pastel pink and green, have the moms in a tone with similar vibes (ie another pastel) such as a lavender, peach, sky blue etc.

I found telling them what I would prefer them not to be in worked out better than telling them what to wear (and I am very fortunate to not have a FMIL who would dare to come in a dress that could easily be mistake for a wedding dress).

My future MIL does not know wedding protocol/traditions where the mother of the bride buys her dress first. She got her dress literally right after we got engaged in January of LAST YEAR! My mom still has not picked out a dress yet! She went looking for dresses recently and the people at Saks told her to come back next month so that the fall lines are out which makes perfect sense. I was pretty annoyed with my future MIL for getting a dress before I had a dress, we knew what attire the wedding would be, wedding colors, venue, bridesmaid dresses... But I spoke with my mom and she wasn't upset. If she found a dress she really likes and really wants, just go for it.

My future MIL got a dark blue dress and my mom is thinking about getting a charcoal gray dress which I think will look great on her.

I always say it is a good idea to plan your shopping ahead of time. for few reasons

1- you want to have enough time to find something flattering and is available in your favorite color.

2- you might have to alter the dress so you have enough time to take it to a professional tailor, sometimes dresses need some extra modifications like adding sleeves or beadings so you might need to do fitting a few times. make sure you've got enough time before the wedding.

3- many department stores and boutiques have great sales during holidays. there is a good chance you can get your favorite dress at a very reasonable price.