Mother in laws inappropriate dress

"This dress definitely changed your relationship???

How old are you??

I really don't see what the big deal is. There are so many other important things to put energy into in regards to your wedding. Don't worry about being upstaged because you won't be.

There is no humanly possible way ANYONE can upstage the bride. If anything, people will get a chuckle behind her back at how atrocious she looks. She will only be in a FEW pictures. If she won't budge, try not to worry about it.

I don't mean to be a dick, but you need to just let stuff like this go. It really doesn't (or shouldn't) matter to your life. You don't get to dictate what an adult wears. If it doesn't match the formality of your wedding, that might be awkward for her, but if she wants to wear it, that's her call. If you try to control what other people are doing, you're going to have a pretty stressful time planning.

FWIW, my MIL wore a gown to my semi-formal wedding. It was the same color as my bridesmaids dresses and more formal than my own dress. I kind of rolled my eyes when she showed it to me, but never did I think, "but what about ME?" It's a dress for god's sake.

I don't see the big deal. Honestly my mom is gonna be very dressed up cuz that's how she is in general. But if my FH mom wanted to look that nice for our wedding day, I'd be all for it.

It's c'est la vie. If that dress makes your mother feel beautiful, that's a good thing. Stop.

What a dress! Certainly not the ideal MOG dress, but it is what it is. If he can talk to her, great! If not, nothing outshines the bride's dress anyways. It's your day and people will know it.

If she ends up wearing the dress, she'll look like a fool. Not you. I'm sorry that this is the way she is acting, weddings bring out the crazy.

I understand why you're annoyed but she definitely won't upstage you. Just let her do it and pick your battles. People will know she's high maintenance.

I wouldn't let my fmil gown make me upset if she wants to wear an evening gown then I would let her, and be happy that she feels beautiful.

Don't worry about it, she won't upstage you. She might get a little bit of attention, but a lot of it might be people saying to each other "What the hell was she thinking??" You will be a beautiful radiant bride and she, no matter what she wears, will be a 56 year old woman trying to grab attention. And before anybody slams me for "ageism", I'm 64 and I see it for what it is--an older woman who, because her child is getting married, is suddenly aware that she isn't the "cute young chick" anymore and is trying to fight back against it. You are the star of the show that day, so don't worry about her--nobody steals the bride's limelight!

And yeah, I am getting married again at this age (widowed 5 years ago) and we are having a wedding because--we want one!

^^ I don't follow. What does her child getting married have to do with her not being the cute young chick anymore? That statement is weird.

S&J, let me try to explain. When people get older, like in their 50s and 60s or even older, they don't feel that old deep inside. Most of us old people know that even though we don't feel that old, we are, so we try to act our age and grow old with dignity. Some people can't accept the fact that they are not still the "cute young chick" or "belle of the ball" that they were when they were in their youth. For many people, the realization hits when they have a child getting married because they suddenly realize that they really ARE in their 50s or 60s. And they panic and they want to recapture that feeling that they were the cutest little thing in shoe leather. They might still be very attractive, but let's face it, a 56 year old woman is not a cute young chick. And my statement was meant to convey that this FMIL might very well be feeling an anxiety to recapture her youth, therefore, she bought the dress that the bride feels is inappropriate and might steal her thunder on her big day. I hope that clarifies it, because I don't think I can explain it any better.

At least her ass and boobs aren't hanging/falling out.

It's a beautiful dress, and it's awesome that she wants to look great for your wedding.

Oh... I can see a lot of boob popping out of that top, if she's a size 16. And I would never wear a thigh-high slit, and I'm young enough to be her daughter.

I went to a wedding where the MOB overdressed, but not like that. The invitations said semi-formal, the bridesmaids wore short dresses, the bride wore an average gown; the MOB wore this fancy, beaded gown, suitable for a black-tie wedding. She ended up being the one looking silly.

Get her a wrist corsage, she'll look like she is ready for prom.

Three foot train? Is she getting her dress bustled, too?! It is a beautiful dress, but shows a lot more leg then either of our mom's would dare show, esp at a wedding! (Anyone thinking of the movie Monster in Law, lol!)

Anyway, like everyone else has already said, you're the bride. It's you and your FH's day. She won't upstage you. If she draws any attention, it'll be the side-eye.

@spazzy Amen

That dress 'changed your relationship' with her? You 'left the store in tears'? I'm sorry, you are overreacting.

If you're crying over this, you've got a long six months ahead of you. Actually. Just a long life. This is not dire, and she won't "take the day" from you.