Marriage First... Wedding Later

Im married already myself and gotten married back in 2010. Me and my husband is renewing our vows with a wedding along with family and friends. We went to the court house as well but we didnt have nobody but one of my sistas there. We have kids so they didnt even get to see us exchange vows. So now they will be in my wedding party. It will take place on our fifth anniversary. Just a sure your husband that it will be okay. Its something u really want to do and how much it would mean to u. Im sure he wants to do it. Shouldnt nobody have anything negative to say. Either they gonna come or they not.

I think you should do it!

any time theres a wedding or ceremony of any kind there's likely someone that has something to say about it, not much to be done about that.

personally, I don't understand why people get on their high horse about those that have their weddings after they get legally married, or those that want to renew vows.

I saw call it whatever you want, do what makes you happy. no one has the right to stop you, and regardless of what many will probably have to say about it, you can have a wedding legally married or not, at any time you want.

do it and have a blast!

What BoxingBride and grumbledore said. You're already married, thus you already had your wedding. IF you want to do a vow renewal, go for it, but please don't call it a wedding, because you had that the day you married your DH.

Typically, you also wouldn't have the traditional things like the dances or bouquet/garter toss at a vow renewal, but if you want to get a dress, renew vows, and have a party afterwards, go for it. Just don't refer to it as a wedding, it won't be.

That's not how/where I'd choose to spend my money, but at the end of the day, DH has to be onboard and it doesn't matter what the rest of us think. Good luck.

Thanks to all of you who said to go for it ! Definitely reminds me that it about what we want and if familiy/friends have anything negative to say then it's on them not us. If I shouldn't call it a wedding what should I call it?

Also a lot of familiy and friends were upset they didn't get to see us say our vows we have been together for 11 years so a lot of our familiy and friends wanted to be a part of our big day. I have familiy from Bolivia who want to come and be part of the special day

We don't want to spend an enormous amount of money just have something simple and romantic were we say our vows on the beach with our familiy and friends there. BTW hubby appreciates the feedback as well! Thanks to those of you who told me to go for it. And those of you who don't think it's a good idea I appreciate your comments.

I would probably call it a vow renewal

Paris has the best possible answer I think. It's not my thing, but if it's yours, I would call it a celebration of marriage

you could word invitations like:

John and Sheila Smith invite you to a celebration of their marriage on Month Day Year...

I would call it a vow renewal - not a wedding since you guys are already married (congrats by the way!)

Definitely make your dream come true - the description of the party sounds like a lot of fun.

Don't worry about what your husband's family is thinking - you are celebrating the marriage you already have and nothing is going to change the fact you are happily married.

Go for it but definitely don't fake a ceremony - go for a renewal or just the party

Call it what it is: either a celebration of your marriage, or a vow renewal: celebration of your marriage would be just the party, no vows. Vow renewal would be the whole deal, ceremony with vows and party that follows.

To me, a ceremony and a wedding are not the same thing.

That said, since your family already saw you get married, there's no reason you can't just have a kick-ass reception with everyone where you have dreamed of. And where your dress again.

Call it a vow renewal or celebration of your marriage.

It isn't a wedding - because you are already married, but that doesn't mean you can't say your vows and have a huge party to dance the night away with your friends and family.

My husband & I married August 2, 2013 for military reasons. We're having our "Celebration" on Sept. 20th. I don't refer to it as a wedding, because it's not. We'll be having a ceremony that will include our parents & we will renew our vows, then have a reception to follow.

On our invites it says, "Please Join Us for the Celebration of the Marriage of Casey & Tyler".

You can celebrate your marriage however & whenever you like. No one is giving us any problems either. This is what worked best for us.

Sheila, you would call it a vow renewal, celebration of your marriage, or anniversary party. Any of those are fine. A wedding is when you wed - you did that already. So now, you are renewing your vows in front of more people followed by a party. You aren't having a wedding.

I would do a quick vow renewal on the beach with everyone and then throw a fun party. I would skip the "wedding" stuff such as bridal party, bouquet toss, etc.

I would call it a vow renewal, that is what we are doing. We were married on January 26th and it was just us. We're having a vow renewal and reception on October 18th in my home state where the majority of my family lives. So far I haven't gotten any negative comments from my family instead those that I've talked to have been very supportive.

No, I think they got married in October 2013 after having been together for 11 years.

I agree with the others - vow renewal

Even though your wedding was not the dream wedding you envisioned, you're already married. Congratulations (no, really--congratulations!), but your wedding already happened.

It's okay to have a vow renewal, or an anniversary party. A vow renewal would be a nice way for you to exchange vows in front of your friends and family without faking a legally binding wedding ceremony.

Vow renewal, and there is nothing wrong with wanting to do it. People get married for different reasons all the time. There is no reason you shouldn't be able to have a special party to celebrate after the fact. If your paying for it who cares what other people think..

I agree with Aronna. To me a wedding is different from just a ceremony.

Honestly we are in the same situation, we got married by court last December and it was only the two of us. Our families really wanted to see us get married and were a little hurt that they weren't "invited" later on this year we will be doing the whole wedding, including the traditional ceremony and reception. On our one year anniversary and I am very happy with our choice. You deserve your wedding and if you have the means to do it now go for it! Sometimes you don't get the chance the first time around but if you can now I say go for it! And don't let anyone else bring you down,what is most important with this wedding is first and foremost yours and your husbands happiness. Wish you well and hope everything comes out perfect!

It is a vow renewal. Not a wedding. It's your money so do want you want. The people who don't like the idea won't go and you'll be left being surrounded by people who want to be there. It will work out.