Maid of Honor

You wanted your friend to be your MOH in the first place, your mom shouldn’t sway that decision. Stand your ground.

I agree with what pp said.

Even if your sister was willing to be in your wedding, does not mean you need to choose her. Choose the friend, if that is what you want. Sisters need not be in wedding parties. It is not at all nice/ polite for your mother to get involved. This is one of few decisions made solely by the bride. At this time, your sister is preaching about there being no need for weddings. Why involve her?
Put her on your invitation list, and let shower or bachelorette hostesses know you would like her invited. She comes, or she doesn't. This sudden non belief in love and marriage is likely a short term thing, a few months to a few years. But at the moment it serves as a defense system: to prevent well meaning people from asking her to be part of events that may be painful right now, because she thought they would happen for her. Why should your mom, or you, tear down this shield she has put up to temporarily protect her from hurt? Let her be. Ask your friends. And practice several polite ways of asking your mom to mind her own business. Mom, I have already decided to ask friends. This is something that I decide, myself, and I would appreciate it if you would have respect for me and not question who I want in my bridal party. Do not, under any circumstances, get into a discussion of reasons why your sister should or should not be chosen. That is not an argument to make with your mom, since she will make it sound like you are critizing your sister, or you don't lover her, all garbage. The point is, mom is crossing her boundary lines here. Some decisions now are yours or FI's to make, not hers. And bridal party on your side is up to you. And you would like friends. Period. Not up for discussion. ( And this will kindly let your sister work things through without challenging her temporary anti-marriage stance. She is hurting. Let her be.)

Agree with the others, while your sister's attitude may change, her attitude right now is not great for the happiest event of your life. Your sister may appreciate that she only needs to buy a dress and show up, and doesn't have the pressure that some MOHs can feel. I'm sure your friend will be honored to be asked!

I would stick to a friend than my sister. That's what I'm doing. My best friend has been there my whole life, where my sisters have not. There going to be part of my brides maid party but not MOH. I thought about the one person who has always been there in my life threw thick and thin. There is also another way to do it also. Have your sister be a part of your planning, so she doesn't feel left out. If she doesn't want to that's up to her.

I'd talk to my sister about it. She might just tell you point blank that she doesn't want to be MOH.

Ask your BFF to be your moh, and your sister to be a bm. If feelings get hurt, just tak it out with her. If necessary, have 2 moh. Nbd, you got this. 🙂

I agree with the others, while your sister's mind may change, you already said you've always wanted to ask your friend to be MOH. That's what you should do, and then maybe if you want you could ask your sister to be a bridesmaid. Mom should not be pressuring you on bridal party.