Living together before wedding

My FH and I have been living together for about a year and a half now and just got engaged in December. For me personally I'm glad we've been living together before marriage as you really get to know more about a person, how they are, and their little quirks. I'm glad I know these things now and know that we can easily share responsibilities that come with living together prior to being married.

I believe it's a personal decision. My FH and I got engaged on my birthday 11/12/16- our two years together is April. We're in the same state but LONG distance 153 miles apart! We don't live together. He has his house and I have mine. We spend time at each other houses. I get to see most of the quirky things he does that bother me SOUL(leaving the toilet seat up) I'm sure my OCD drives him nuts.. we love each other! I can't imagine a day without him.. That's enough to weather any storm coming our way. Best of luck in your decision

We've lived together 5 years and have 2 babies! You will be fine. Sometimes is actually better before you get married so you know what you are getting lol

DH and I lived together after about 5 months of our relationship. He asked me to move in with him in November, and we started dating seriously in September of that year. We didn't move in together officially until February. Our reasons were mainly financial and for safety reasons. My mom wasn't thrilled, but she was happy that I didn't live alone over 1200 miles from home. We had our ups and downs living together, but it has definitely helped ease the transition from dating to being engaged to living together as a married couple. We honestly had the living together fights before getting married so that helped.

FH canceled his lease and moved into my mother's house about 5 months ago so we can save up for our own home. I think living together before marriage is extremely beneficial. You get to see and know a lot about a person once you are living together. It also helps because I've come to realize how messy FH is and I am trying to break him out of those habits before we move in together LOL.

If I may be honest, the way the question was worded sounds very immature. You sound young and thinking that you will "spoil the excitement" to be is a red flag that perhaps you aren't prepared/ready for marriage. Good thing is, this is just a first impression off of a couple of sentences so there is a huge possibility I am wrong. Also if I am right, you aren't getting married for almost two years, so you have plenty of time to get there. I highly suggest you live together first. Like, for real. The only reason not to is you are a virgin and have a strong religious belief that you are going straight to hell if you live with the man first. Even then I don't think agree, but I can at least respect that as a personal choice. Any other reason makes no sense to me and the practicality of living together and what you learn about each other from doing so is very important. DO IT.

I can not imagine marrying someone i never lived with. You learn a whole lot by living with someone. Everyone has little quirks and it is a big adjustment living with each other. I highly suggest moving in together first.

Agree with most pps, highly recommend living together before making it permanent

Living together isn't glamorous, but it is a forecast of the future.

Do it.

It's a personal decision. We moved in together about three years before our wedding (before we were engaged.) It was a great decision. I do not think it will ruin the excitement of living together because there are so many more milestones down the road, like buying a house, etc.

We're living together prior to getting married. I'd high suggest it. FH and I have learned a lot about each other up til this point so I see it as a very big benefit and a great time to learn more about one another as time goes on up until that big day.

H and I moved in together 4 months after we started dating due to the distance (we lived a rough 1.5 hours from each other. And when I say rough, I mean through NJ lol). So we've lived together now for a year and a half and I think it was the best decision for us. We're very similar in our habits but it gave us time to get used to each other and create familiarity and a routine with each other.

And after coming home from the wedding, it doesn't feel different. We're already accustomed to life together, so now being married there's no major change to adjust to. We literally went right back to our usual routine with the exception of calling each other husband and wife.

Echoing everyone else, totally worth it to live together beforehand. FH and I have been cohabitating for eight years now, and we know everything about each other. I know he takes longer to get ready than I do when we have somewhere to be, and he knows I can't stand dishes in the sink or crawling into bed without a shower. We know what the other's paychecks and spending habits look like, and how to give each other space when needed.

What happens if you move in together and find you can't stand sharing space with him for more than a week?

The wedding shouldn't change anything between the two of you. We're not getting married until October, and I know that at this moment, as I sit on the couch beside FH and he watches reruns of Burn Notice, he loves me the same way he will love me on the day of our wedding, and the day after that, hopefully until forever. No new expectations, no "After the wedding he'll be more into chick flicks and cooking dinner more often", because that's not who he is, who we are.

...and while I haven't been married yet, I'm fairly positive that knowing the man I share a home and our bills with is waiting for me at the alter will make me a little less nervous.

ETA: Please update your profile pic so we have an image to associate with your posts

I wouldn't move in with someone to test the water personally. I was engaged when I moved in with my fiancé and it's been great, and very exciting, but it was very important to me that it wasn't a trial - that it was a commitment to starting a life together and that we would be committed to working out any struggles we had when we lived together. This was an important distinction to me.

It also helped to make the transition easier that we talked about everything in advance like who would do what chores, what the expectations were, how we would pay for things. When we moved in, nothing was really a huge surprise bc we had talked about it

To be honest with you, now that I've lived with FH for three years, I don't think I'd ever want to marry someone without living with them (much to my mothers dismay haha). It's true what they say, you don't truly know someone until you live with them. If you can live with someone and see all their quirks and flaws, and love them despite everything and through everything, your marriage is off to a good start.

FH and I actually lived together before we started dating (we were friends first) so our situation was a little different once we started dating. We had already lived together once and knew what to expect, but that didn't change how awesome it felt when we got a place of our own a couple years into the relationship. I still love coming home to him, and it gave us a great chance to further explore how we handle a household just the two of us (as opposed to us plus friends).

I agree with others on cohabitating before marriage. I've been living with my FH for over a year now, and have been dating for over 4 years. I honestly believe that it's been instrumental in strengthening our relationship. We also had some revolving roommates, so managing that nightmare also made us grow closer! It hasn't been easy but we understand each other on a deeper level than before and it's been amazing for us. We've really learned to let go and compromise and I think it's a wonderful preparation for our future married life.

Me and my fiancé will be together 6 years come may. We got engaged last summer in June and are having our wedding in August. I moved in with him about 4-5 months of us dating, which was his families house only because of family issues at my house. He was the first boyfriend I've ever live with. Moved again with his family last April when they decided to leave the state and I went with them so we could stay together. So even though we have yet to have our own place "just us two" we know how it is living together after all these years. Plan on getting into a place right after the wedding, and I think that will be even more exciting for us since having his family around the whole time. I am glad I've lived with him before getting married so it won't be a huge change when we are actually married. Lol

My FH and i dated for a year before we moved in together, it was like a whole new relationship! We learned so much bout each other and some times it was really rough but we were able to work through the kinks and our pet peeves to make living together work. The first year was rough, but now it's been really great for the past 4 years living together! So yes you never really know someone until you live with them!!

A friend of mine was with this guy for 6 years, they were a great couple. They got married and moved in together and got divorced 6 months later because they couldn't work past each other's bad habits at home!

I would never marry someone without living with them first. I've dated someone and thought they were perfect only to find the relationship just kind of crumble after moving in together. You really learn a lot about each other. Moving in together and/or getting married isnt about excitement, excitement wanes quickly, what's important for both is the commitment and effort you both put in to it.