Is it wrong to pay for a wedding when you have debt?

View Quoted Comment Dave Ramsey is incredibly anti-credit card. He believes all things should be paid for in cash (he’s not even a debit card fan). If you have no open credit or loans, you have no credit, which would make it impossible to qualify for a mortgage.

View Quoted Comment Oooooh okay! Ya I’ve only heard of him but never bothered looking him up. Thank you! I get it! Definitely have open credit, instrumental towards our future and our credit scores haha.

I understand wanting to be debt free, but I personally feel more comfortable knowing I have more in savings, rather than taking a chunk out of savings to pay off a loan or credit card.

I got a large bonus at work this year, which just so happened to be the exact amount that I owed on my student loans so I paid them off completely.

I do have a little credit card debt, but I would rather keep my money in my savings account for an emergency and pay off the card when I can.

Story time: FH was on a seasonal layoff this summer and his unemployment claim got held up with the state. His car was stolen from our driveway after 4 weeks of no pay - his keys were in the car (lesson learned on his part). The car was recovered the next day but was damaged. The insurance deductible and the cost of changing the locks on our house totaled around $1,000. I felt much more comfortable taking $1,000 out of emergency savings as opposed to paying off $1,000 on a credit card and then adding a new $1,000 charge. We had a lot of other unexpected expenses this year that did run up my credit card a little bit on top of it (being in FBIL's wedding, hosting Christmas, etc.).

Bottom line: @OP your debt is manageable. You are fine. Do not feel guilty for hosting a wedding. I know our debt will be paid off this year as well as our wedding without completely depleting our savings. As long as you have a plan for your debt as well as emergency savings you are fine.

We bought a house 2 months before we got engaged so that’s over $100K in debt right there😂 we also have a car loan each, student loans, and bills like utilities etc. We don’t have credit card debt, but we use them and pay them off each month. We are 23 and 25, make all of our payments on time and are paying for a lot of our wedding as well. We have a healthy savings account and a healthy income. I’m not waiting until I’m 50 (30 year mortgage) to have a wedding just to be “debt free” my (not-so-money-responsible) grandma always used to say that having debt was the American Dream! 😂 However, I think as long as you aren’t creating more debt for yourself and you’re comfortable with your lifestyle and your responsibilities then I say have the wedding you want to, when you want to.

That’s so personal and unique to each person that I can’t believe anyone would try to tell you what you should do. We have a car note and student loans, but we are paying all cash for our wedding and not skipping payments or anything so I feel like it’s fine. All that matters is what you are comfortable with.

Just a reminder, all of the debt you have is healthy debt. If it hasn’t bounced between collection agencies and you aren’t avoiding your payments you are in an okay situation. Of course it is important to remember that you do not REALLY have 5,000 dollars in the bank if you have 10,000 in debt, but progress not perfection. When my hunny and I met he was very forthcoming in that he made some stupid decisions when he was young and racked up debt and had avoided paying. We worked together to pay them off and are rebuilding his credit. Everything we buy is with my credit and I will likely have student loan debt in the coming years. The key is to be aware of your money and budget in a way that works for you.

OP, you have a lot of responses here telling you it's totally fine. So now it's up to you to decide do you "trust" more, the people on this site who have shared their stories, or the people on the Facebook page? Who do you want to be more like? Which is closer to your goals and plans in life?

Personally I would be more like the people in your Facebook group. But I don't think it's irresponsible to cash flow a small wedding while paying off debt. Key words small, and cash flow (which means don't take out any additional debt - pay for it from your cash left over after bills).

View Quoted Comment He’s all about not financing anything and getting rid of all credit cards. You will have a great score if you have had debt that you paid regularly (and if the loans, etc you paid off are fairly recent, they’re still in your report) and have revolving credit that you use and pay off. But if someone has no loans and no cards, they have no credit history, which is fine if you want to only pay cash for everything. He’s not anti mortgage...and certain “endorsed” companies advertise with him, as accepting those with no credit who have sufficient income. of course, I’m always skeptical of someone endorsing something that pays them. I listen to him, and I’m all for no debt, and it feels great to not owe a ton, but I did not get rid of my credit cards. I’m like you and pay in full. I like that I can more easily track. So, some might say I’m paying for my wedding with credit cards—I’m using that as payment but i pay in full every month.

Good grief...if you want to spend that much on your wedding, go for it. You only get to do it once

LOL, if I lived by that I could have a wedding when I'm 51, because that's when I will have paid off grad school ($65k in student loans). Luckily, I had an athletic scholarship for undergrad.

View Quoted Comment

This is not true. My FH did not have any open credit and paid for everything in cash, literally a bag of cash to the dealership when he bought his truck and he has over 780 credit score and was able to get a $500,000 by himself. That makes literally no sense.

View Quoted Comment Did he have most of that loan amount in liquid assets? I’m just speaking from personal experience. ExH had paid off his car, and had no student loans and no credit cards, and when we went to apply for our first mortgage through the VA he had no credit score because he had no open lines of credit. We also had no liquid assets so obviously the bank wasn’t going to give us a mortgage based on that.

I have student loan debt. FH only has his car. We will be paying upfront for everything for our wedding, with help from both sets of our parents. Imo as long as we are not going FURTHER into debt it's okay.

Me and my fh have no real bills to be in debt from. But we didnt want to go broke for our wedding . so we decided what we could afford after paying our bills. We tightend our belts and gave up a few things but it in our opinion was worth it. We are excited and lookong forward to our 💒

I am in a Dave Ramsey group and I’m also planning my wedding. I think the general idea is no new debt. So as long as I am not going into debt for this wedding then it’s okay.

Just keep paying off your debt and enjoy planning. Don't worry what people say because its no one business and they have no say.

My FH would not marry me if he was looking soley at my debt. I have significant student loans from grad school, and so does he. With that being said we are focusing on managing our debt first when getting married. He lived with his parents for a few years paying off debt, we're going to live with roommates for several years, stay away from major debt, hold off on starting a family, stay within a strict budget, and let go of what our parents and cultural standards say is right for a married couple. When you get married you two write the rules. Best of luck!!!

I have a mortgage, a car payment, and small credit card debt. I can't see telling FH who really wanted a wedding that he couldn't have that because I bought a house before meeting him. We budgeted for the wedding we could afford, while paying bills and maintaining our life outside of the wedding. I think the idea that you can't have a wedding because you have debt is ridiculous.

All of your debt sounds like "good debt" to me. So, I see no issue. If you were struggling to get by or pay your bills, I would recommend against having an unnecessary party.

That is crazy. I have a student loan, credit cards and pet debt. But that is not stopping me from having a wedding which so far we have no debt with as we have paid everything up front.