Is it wrong not to live with you fiance befor the wedding?

Chiming in kinda late but absolutley echoing what other brides are telling you. it IS a matter of personal preference. as a christian, my religion raises me to not "shack up" but my FH and i have been living together for going on 2 years now.. we've known each other since we were kids, but felt we needed to do this because its nice to know if you two can really make it in a household. i also agree that maybe getting married when you both aren't financially stable isn't the best idea.. finances BREAK UP otherwise happy and healthy marriages. so, you'll do what's best for you, but be smart and never RUSH anything. what is meant and ordained to be will be so just make sure your aligned with what is suppossed to happen for you.

You're right incognito, they're not necessary. However, we're all allowed to speak freely. We were just giving honest opinions, which we are entitled to do. And which also, IMO, is just as valuable as the sugar coated lip service usually doled out around here.

Well I highly recommend living together before the wedding to work out those kinks, like why does he leave his shoes in random places around the house for me to trip on? I'm not speaking from personal experience or anything. But if you don't have the money to get an apartment together, just wait until you have better jobs.

I wouldn't have married DS if I HADN'T lived with him. LOL. Luckily, my family encouraged it. His family of devout Catholics didn't agree with it. But technically, since he's divorced, they wouldn't recognize our marriage anyways. Regardless, we did what works for US. We were both financially stable before moving in together. It's only been since I moved here with him that I took a huge pay cut and have had to financially depend on him.BUT, we both knew that he could handle it and we would still be well off.

However, I DO think you guys need to discuss ASAP how you're going to handle finances. It's no joke when you're living together AND married. If you guys haven't yet seen a financial advisor, I suggest you do so immediately.

We do spend every weekend with each other and a week or 2 so we know some of the habits that gets on each other nerves. i do agree it is a personal choice. we did have to bush back the wedding to fall of 2011 because of money issues. my fh works in the housing co. so the job goes up and down all the time. one week its a nice check and the next week its a low check. i think its hard for every one to live in this economy specially a freash new couple that wants to get married. with the way things are going in the economy it makes it hard to get a good paying job if your not going to start a business. i do agree that financial issues can break up some couples but we already went through a long distance relationship when he went to school in wyoming so i think if we can get through that even though it was really hard then we can get through any thing. we both know that we are each other soul mate and nothing can tear us apart.

Ive learned when you want something so bad you are the only one that can make it happen!

Good advice jenn! my dad is an accountant so all we have to do is talk to him about it.

@IncognitoBride: The articles you've posted are very informative! I'm not a pyschologist or social scientist, but the logic laid out seems more than reasonable. I've always felt it's not just the act of sharing a dwelling that lets people know they can "make it," it's the level of commitment they have when they enter a co-habitating relationship. Heck, if it were just a simple matter of sharing a dwelling, there a number of roommates in my lifetime I could have married and been very happy with!

I do see a lot of couples begin living together without a clear plan, or really any idea of where the future might lead. It's not something I personally understand, and I know I would be offended if some one were to tell me he was taking me for a "test-drive" as if I were a used Suburu, but then to each his/her own! It's what makes this world the interesting place it is!

It does seem reasonable but i think it all depends on the couple, some couple find out later in the relationship that they are not meant to be but my sis lived with her hubby befor they got married at st.johns usvi and my bro lived with his wife befor they got married but they both were in school so they didnt see much of each other. i found not all studys are true!

Me and my husband didn't live together before we were married because of our personally beliefs that you should me married before you have sexual relations. We haven't had any problems at all! In fact I think that it has really helped us because we both have weird habits, haha like I have to have every door closed and the bed made every day, and my husband loves a clean bathroom! But with differences we've really learned to be more patient and it's been really wonderful

It's all totally personal prefrence! We lived together before we got married, and I don't care what statistics say, there are WAY to many variables in how relationships end in divorce (one of them being if you live together before you're married)