Is it rude to ask guests to pay for all or some of the meal?

If your family and friends know you they’ll understand. Tell them weddings are expensive and you guys are saving for a kid or home😜

It is considered very rude to asks guest to pay for any part of your wedding. If you are trying to keep costs down, then you should look into all inclusive locations. You may want to cut down your guestlist or leave out the extras, such as photobooths, favors, buffet vs. plated meals, etc. A big expense is the alcohol (consider beer/win instead of spirits).

This is extremely rude. The reception is your event that you are hosting for your guests as a thank you for them celebrating you and your marriage. Your guests should not be paying for any part of this event.

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All inclusive venues have 5figure plus food/beverage minimums that are often not feasible for a couple to meet if they are on a budget.

If cost is a concern and a full meal is a must (and you are not willing to serve just desserts at a non meal time), your best bet is a parks department owned venue and drop off catering from a favorite local restaurant.

As far as alcohol goes, take your guests into consideration. If you know with 110% certainty that they only drink beer.wine, then serve that. If you know they don’t drink it, then serving beer/wine only will be wasted money.

View Quoted Comment Since when? I thought the reception was for the guests to mingle and receive the newlyweds. Not being rude, but I think it’s tacky to pay for your own wedding. Traditionally, families paid and hosted.

View Quoted Comment If you can’t or won’t pay for your own wedding, then don’t have one. Elope with zero guests. The tradition of parents paying has been out of practice for a couple decades at least. If the parents offer to pay, that is a gift but not a requirement.


A wedding reception is similar to a large dinner party that a couple hosts in their home, but on a bigger scale. You do not invite people to dinner at your house and then when they show up tell them “we didn’t fix anything because that’s your job to buy groceries and cook for us”. Those folks would cut off contact with you then and there.

When I got married, we paid for everything (guests only had to pay for their travel costs, hotel room, etc). Non-alcoholic beverages were covered by us. We had a limited bar (certain type of beer, certain types & amount of wine, bride & groom cocktail), once those ran out or if guests wanted something else, they paid for their own.