IS IT REALLY THE "BRIDES DAY"

Let me give a vendors perspective on why our prices are the way they are (For Dj & Video) Most people don't realize how much actually goes into planning the day. An average wedding for me is about 12 hours long on the day of. But that's the easy part. Take into consideration the 40-50 hours of editing, the 10 or so hours spent dealing with the bride and groom, the cost of equipment, etc. You're talking about anywhere from 50-80 hours spent per wedding. Also, when you use top notch videographers and dj's, they're going to get paid more than people with less experience and equipment. What it comes down to, is make sure a company can explain why their pricing is the way it is, and how they justify it. What you want to find is the best "value", not the best "price".

Kevin

Both families. We believe that nothing is acceptable unless it's very costly. I am so glad I woke the hell up and realized that weddings are suppose to be all about LOVE and not MONEY. Do you know I inquired about a weding planner I saw advertised on a certain website. I spoke to her and she was appauled that I did not want a bridal shower.Saying to me that this is the time when I should be so happy that I will be getting all these gifts. I said to her I just wanted to marry my FH and have a celebration for the family and some friends. She was amazed. Don't get me wrong it's wonderfull to dress up for one day and be beautifull and have everyone adore you. But... you don't have to pay all that excess of money to feel and be beautiful and be treated as such. By the way. Does the bridal industry know we are in a recession. It seems that prices have not gone down an anything concerning weddings but then again I live in New York.

To answer the rest of your post i totally agree. Too many people try to impress everyone, and go over the top, forgetting the real reason for the wedding. When feeling out the people you choose to work with, you'll get a good idea of who genuinely cares about providing the best service vs. who sees you as a dollar sign, or another name on their calendar.

I don't think that the whole "It's your day" is just a way of getting ripped off. The only way I see it as "our day", since it is both mine and my FH's day, is that the CHOICES are ours. So if we want to have an elaborate event that's up to us. If we want a quaint, backyard family day that's our choice as well. Many people make it their special day without spending a fortune so I don't see those ideas as correlating. And the previous poster is correct, a lot more work and time goes into the production of the wedding by your vendors other than just the 5 hours of the actual wedding and they should be compensated for their work accordingly.You get what you pay for in life. And as for the dress and everything else, i did not pay a single cent over what we could afford and no one else is contributing, but it's still OUR day. I agree that people can get carried away and even go into debt over their weddings, but I don't see what that has to do with it being the bride and groom's special day

I say.... is it the brides day? because. So many people have said to me already "this is your day" never mind what they want. I even had my FH sister say to me it's not about the groom but it's about the bride. Which is completely wrong. The reason I went off on the bridal industry is because I had someone tell me when asked why their prices are so high, they responded by saying some brides pay more. I have read a book called Bridal Bargains. (You probaly heard of it) What a book. The scams and lies that are told by the bridal industry to actual brides to be is amazing. Check it out. By all means... If you have the money go all out. But... the bridal industry now uses that same high price lock that someone paid them and passes it on to me, and now someone like me who can't afford the high price called the "Platinum Package" we are getting second best and no one wants to be second.

I agree i dont see the point of buying thousands of dollars of a dress that is only going to be worn once that is stupid!! mine was orignally 950, BUT it was on sale for 650. (my budget was 500 so it wasn tthat bad and plus it was a dicontinued item and i love it),. thats all i gotta say on the dresses. i dont know bout the tuxes or a actual wedding planner or anything. (our theme is western and the guys arent wearing tuxes). the cake is like 300. the only thing expensive is the hall five thousand and the dj and phtos. (but got discount for the photos). the limo also got a discunt too.

I think that scamming happens in every commercial industry. I mean you can buy a pair of jeans for $20 but some people think you must get the designer brands for $250. Does that mean the girl in $20 jeans won't look good? Of course not. I think in the wedding industry it's even easier to convince people they have to spend more because it's so emotional. It's a special day to remember the rest of your life, who doesn't want the BEST. yes, some sales people use that to thier advantage. But even if you have a $500 budget wedding, you still have every right to feel like it's your specail day, because it will be! It doesn't take spending money to feel that way. I actually thought it was fun to find the over priced stuff and figure out how to do it for so much less. I found invites that actually cost $45 EACH!! ridiculous. So I made them for less than $5 each and liked mine even better. It's the way life is overall in this country, not jsut wedding stuff. everyone wants to be a celebrity

Absolutely I agree with you. Would you believe that a friend of mine spent over a hundred thousand dollars to have her wedding that was a replica of the 50's. Do you know what she said to me. If I knew then what I know now I would of never spent so much money. She spent Ten thousands dollars on flowers and her arrangements were branches and tulips. Literally. I inquired about renting a limo for my bridal party and discovered that when ever I say WEDDING prices go up. I have done the research with different venues, photographers, caterers and Limos, bridal stores and if you switch your story around and tell them it's for a party you get a better price than for a wedding. One Limo company was charging me $100 extra for a red carpet to be rolled out. I then inquired about the same day as my wedding but pretended I wanted a limo for a bunch of friends to hang out got a whole different price even though it was the same day and I would be receiving the same items as my "weding package"

"weddings are suppose to be all about LOVE and not MONEY"

I completely agree with everything! I am planning my own wedding right now and the costs of things is ridiculous! I only have a $3000 budget so I am a DIY bride and contrary to what most believe everything is coming out beautiful and I like everything I have done better than things I have seen online for purchase. The wedding market is a raquet, prices sky rocket when they find out your a bride. But that's how it is and you just have to find your own way to cut costs. You can find cheaper vendors, photographers, dj's, ect. Just because they are cheap doesn't mean they are bad. Some expensive vendors will say that you get what you pay for, but I say that every vendor has to start somewhere.

I know exactly what you mean about the price going up as soon as it has a "bridal" label with it!looking at dresses for my mother, if a dress was labeled "mother of the bride dress" you could count on it costing $500! even the bridesmaid dresses right next to it that were just as high quality were only like $100.I swore it was because they know the mother of the bride is more willing to pay the higher price because it MEANS more to her.It's a shame that so many want to take advantage of people's emotions like that. But we, as the brides, have the power to ignore the hype and have our days be special to us in more personal ways.Having said that, I think that if someone earns their money they have a right to spend it anyway they choose and it's not up to someone else to judge. "expensive" is very subjective. So I won't tell anyone else that they are wrong to spend money on their dress, etc. That's what makes it "OUR DAY" is the personal choices of it all. To each his own!

So, is it the brides day? You BETCHA! I look at it as being MY day. As girls, we are taught from a VERY young age that the day you get married is the most joyful fairytale amazing day you will every have. That is true. But its true weather you have a horse drawn carraige, or a BBQ for friends. A wedding is what YOU and your FH make it, nothing else. Yes, "bridal" comes with a cost. I want to get my makeup done for the wedding. Regular makeup is $50. BRIDAL makeup is $85. But honestly, its your one day to BE the princess. It is. I cant WAIT to be the princess that one day. But I also cant wait to share the day with my FH. It IS our day. I see it as our day. But it STILL is the brides day I dot have to spend a lot of money on my wedding to get MY fairytale...but I WANT the fairytale

I agree with a couple of the other posters that your wedding day will be "YOUR DAY" (your day meaning yours and your FIs day) no matter how much you spend. I am having a pretty pricey wedding but I was never coaxed into anything I didnt want because I was told it was "MY DAY". I am also doing a TON of DIY projects to cut down on the cost and to have FUN while doing it all... I only plan on planning and having my wedding one time and for something I have been waiting for since I was 3 years old I am going to have a grand old time doing it!!! I will say this though... use family friends as vendors if you can; you will get HUGE discounts and they will do a better job for you. Both my DJ and Florist are family friends and not only did we get a discount on the price but I know I can count on them for exactly what I want. Our wedding day isnt "my" day it is "our" day and I dont think by spending a lot of money that makes it any less our time about our love...