Is it okay to request formal attire

I am discreetly putting "formal day wear requested" someplace in the wedding website, because only "black tie" or "white tie" should be put on an invitation. I am mentioning it because we are looking at THE top places in our state to have a wedding, and to be honest, the guests don't need to be showing up to any of these places in camo. x-P

We were originally going to have a true black tie wedding, but decided that we prefer a morning/lunch ambiance. It will still be formal, and so my (formal, high class, educated, and traditional) mother and I have absolutely no qualms about saying that a certain level of dress is REQUESTED. I won't have it on the invitations, though.

I will be putting a note in with the invitation envelope. "Formal Attire Appreciated"

That's totally acceptable.

I've had friends put on their wedding invitations: "semi-formal attire requested" and it worked as far as I could tell.

Hi nadine and congratulations!!

it is completely acceptable to indicate the level of dress for your wedding - and as a guest it is much appreciated... especially for those that are not that familiar with your location / venue / theme - that may not immediately indicate to them the level of formality.

we had a DW in san juan - everything was high end, and we did not want guests to think it was a beach / flip-flop wedding... we made it more fun by stating "cocktail attire and dancing shoes requested" at the bottom of the invitation, and guests thought that was cute and clever.

i would say 8 out of 10 of the last invitations i have received have indicated the dress on them - - and these are intimate backyard affairs to $100K blow outs.

i think especially as you have already seen that there are some family members that don't automatically understand what is appropriate for a wedding, and it is important to you and your fiance, that you should include it.

I put formal attire required on my invites because we're getting married in a Roman Catholic Church and I would love for the guests to presentable(my choice). We're also having pictures and video of everything. I've seen it written on wedding invitations and didn't think it was rude at all. Some people just don't know what to wear to wedding or never attended one. I'm used to shopping for a whole new attire, hair and nails done since growing up, my mother always said look your best.

Yes you can request. But unless it is a rule with your venue they may not listen.

I mostly agree with Rev. Ann - people these days do not have a concept of the level of formality required in attire for certain events.

According to Brooks Brothers and most etiquette experts, formal indicates black tie, which means men in tuxedos and women in ball gowns.

Therefore I would not use the word formal. On a website, not on the invitation, I would have a little section about attire. You could put something like "The wedding will be a cocktail to semi-formal attire event, meaning men should wear at minimum a jacket or sport coat and slacks, while women will want to stick to dressier evening fabrics."

I think this is a attire guide: http://www.emilypost.com/everyday-manners/your-personal-image/69-attire-chart

Thank you everyone!

Great advice from all especially ashlee for the number of recent invites you have seen with it included

On my invitations we put cocktail attire at the bottom and on our website we put, "Dress is semi-formal to formal (cocktail attire). We ask that you do not wear jeans or shorts."

Ann thank you. I am someone who definitely needs comparisons to make up my mind about certain things.