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AliciaLovesNH
Dedicated October 2016

Is it okay to host your own Jack and Jill

AliciaLovesNH, on June 9, 2016 at 6:11 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 40

We're just a couple of months away from our wedding and at this point I am pretty sure neither our family or wedding party will be throwing my fiancé and I a bridal shower or Jack and Jill party. Is it okay to throw your own or is that considered tacky? Should we even throw one at all?

40 Comments

Latest activity by Michelle, on March 15, 2023 at 3:26 PM
  • Hot Like Bea
    Master January 2017
    Hot Like Bea ·
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    No.

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  • Corinne_
    Master September 2016
    Corinne_ ·
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    Jack and Jill as in cohost bachelor and bachelorette? Or as in party with raffle tickets and entry price?

    The first one is borderline tacky to host yourself, the second one should not happen, whether you host it or anyone else.

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  • [anonymous]
    Master October 2017
    [anonymous] ·
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    Wtf is a Jack and Jill party?

    But yes, generally it's considered tacky to throw your own bridal shower, bachelor/ette party, engagement party, etc.

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  • M
    VIP September 2016
    MrsInSeptember ·
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    Do not throw your own party.

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  • AliciaLovesNH
    Dedicated October 2016
    AliciaLovesNH ·
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    A Jack and Jill is a party to raise money for the wedding day. It's most popular in New England and Canada. Your guest would purchase tickets to attend in advance and you and your wedding party would provide the entertainment and food.

    Thank you for the advice. No go on the Jack and Jill.

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  • Possum
    Master December 2015
    Possum ·
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    Tacky.

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  • OG Kathryn
    Champion May 2016
    OG Kathryn ·
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    No

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  • OG Kathryn
    Champion May 2016
    OG Kathryn ·
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    And I don't know what your planning but if includes a newspaper add, people you don't know or no open bar. Double triple NO

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  • Bethie
    Master May 2016
    Bethie ·
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    No. Not okay. Don't host or have.

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  • Old married lady
    Master September 2016
    Old married lady ·
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    No this is the tackiest thing. Don't have a party and charge guests to come

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  • LizzyC
    Master April 2016
    LizzyC ·
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    Not okay to do.

    ETA - I see in your comment you have taken our advice. I recommend updating the title of your post so more people don't comment without reading, like I did Smiley smile

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  • MrsPlasters
    Super September 2015
    MrsPlasters ·
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    Nope.

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  • Arielle
    Expert November 2016
    Arielle ·
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    If no one wants to throw one for you, you do not get to host your own.

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  • NativeBride
    Super October 2016
    NativeBride ·
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    So she would just have to forgo it if no one else wants to? That really sucks....

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  • Erin381
    Master September 2016
    Erin381 ·
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    Native bride - yes that how it works.

    Also no one should ever throw a jack and Jill 'fund raiser' it's not a charity it's a wedding.

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  • NativeBride
    Super October 2016
    NativeBride ·
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    @Erin Well dang. Now I know. Sorry OP!

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  • ChocolatierKT
    VIP September 2016
    ChocolatierKT ·
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    I do agree with not hosting your own bridal shower. But bachelor/bachelorette parties, I don't think it matters as much. You are just going out to party. Just don't expect other people to pay for you. ETA just saw your comment that it's the money raising jack and jill party not the bride and groom together party. No!!!

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  • Mrs. Sasswood
    Master October 2016
    Mrs. Sasswood ·
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    Me: Wtf is a Jack and Jill?

    FH: A jack and jose? Sounds like a party to me.

    Me: No, a Jack and Jill. omfg read this, this is what it is!!!

    FH: I wanna puke... at the idea of that nonsense... and I feel like I'm not alone

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  • Emily
    Master May 2014
    Emily ·
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    Please don't make ignorant comments like these parties are popular in "Canada" - that's not true. They are not done throughout the entire country.

    Secondly, it is extremely tacky to fundraise for a wedding. A wedding is not a charity. Don't worry about the hosting part - you shouldn't be having one of these parties at all.

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  • TimeLadyErika
    Master May 2017
    TimeLadyErika ·
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    I don't think I will have anyone throw me a shower because everyone is spread out. It makes me sad. It makes me really sad. I won't host my own, though. It is in bad taste. I'm sorry you don't have someone to host for you.

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