Is it ok to let a friend live with you until they do their taxes

I had a now ex friend his gf and his gf son live with us until they got on their feet and lets just say thats why they are ex friends her son abused our dogs they never cleaned up after themselves and took adavage of u. the condtion they left the room in still gives me nightmares and it was over a year ago. i don't want that to happen to you. it was really bad for me it may not be bad for you just really really think about it.

Jessica I know. It has beenall I have been thinking about. I talked to my FMIL about it and she thinks I should help her out. But I like my son having his own room.

That's a hard one! I am all for helping a friend out but you will have to give her ground rules (aka no guy staying over) and house rules and a TIME LIMIT if you do it. People get too comfortable mooching and don't notice that they are driving their friends insane. You also have to think that she got herself into this situation so she isn't the most responsible person to begin with. This will also raise your electricity, water and food bills which if she couldn't pay rent she probably wont be chipping in on this either and can you or your FH afford that? Does she not have any family she can stay with? There are always other options! You should not have to feel it is your responsibility to take care of her!

If you decide to help her out, you need to set a clear time limit and household boundaries and stick to them. Years ago, when I was living with an ex, we took in one of his friends for what was supposed to be a month... it wound up being six months! She only moved out when she did because I had had enough and put my foot down.

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Be very clear with your friend about your expectations regarding her boyfriend, childcare, housekeeping, cooking, bills, etc. And make sure there is a very clear timeline about when she needs to move out and what she will do as a backup if she doesn't have a place of her own when its time for her to leave.

Well Im all for helping people, but I agree with the other posts. I think what you could do is have her help with something else and contribute in some other way if she cant give you money for the bills. Im just wondering, why is she being evicted, did she lose her job? Also, she could be like a live-in nanny who cooks and cleans, it doesnt have to be all negative.

First of all, I find it offputting that she asked to move in with you. It's your home, she has no right to ask to stay there, ya know? And I agree with all the other posts, set boundaries and time limits - and get them in writing! That way there is no "he said she said" about when she needs to be out and if need be (but let's hope not) you can take her to court and have her evicted. Make a list of what would be added and what would be removed by her moving in (like alone time is removed, but a live-in cook is added, stress is both added and removed) then put plusses and negatives next to each. Add them up, if the number is positive then go for it, if it's close to zero think about it some more and if it's really negative then tell her no!

This is very tough.

I basically WAS in this situation before. My best friend of 23 yrs (we no longer speak now, but it has nothing to do w/this particular situation) became pregnant, it wasnt a planned thing &since her "fiance" was living w/his 16yr old daughers mom at the time, he would "disappear" for a week or two at a time.. she got herself into a bad situation w/this jerk and an even worse sitch w/a baby on the way. She & I stood in a parking lot at like 12am one night crying, trying to figure out what to do because she was abt to go have an abortion b/c she couldnt reach him. She didt think sh had the $ to hv a baby alone.. in effrt to talk her out of the abortion i told her she could come live with my FH & i.. it was a last ditch effort to get her to think clearly & consider all options b4 she did something she regretted.

Thankfully it never came to that.. they rented a house together & i assume are still together, but my FH thought i was nuts, so did my mom.

Just be CAREFUL

I let a friend move in with me when my husband and I were first married. She was very neat and cooked and was eternally grateful and I'm glad I did it. That being said, I don't know if I would have done it if I had had a child in the house. You have to be careful. It's a nice lesson to teach him that you should help people, but you have to be careful who you allow to live in the same house with your child. Good Luck!

I've been on both sides of this before. When I was 18 I ran away from my parents' house and hopped a plane and flew here...over 700 miles from them. I had no job and no money and actually did spend a little time on the street before I found a friend to stay with. But because I couldn't pay her to let me stay with her, I was cooking and cleaning for her and her bf every single day. I did what I could to pay them back, ya know? I've also let people stay with me. Generally it turned out badly though. Some people are just not as considerate. I'd consider this heavily. Is she the kind of person who will help out in order to pay you back? Or is she going to sneak the bf in and never clean up after herself? If you're not sure, I wouldn't do it. Even if she hasn't known the bf for long, she DOES have other friends and other options. And she CAN ask him if she doesn't have anyone else. Remember that nine times out of ten, you're not someone's ONLY option.

She will be paying 400.00 a month to live here. My FMIL is all for helping people. And she says it's a good idea. I mean have known her since we were 14 yrs old. And we have been bestfriends ever since. I am going to have to set rules in place. And I will give her a deadlne of when she needs to be out. I was actually thinking of before Valentine's Day. And letting her know that her boyfriend CAN'T sleep here. And he has to be gone before 10 p.m. I can't have some strange man walking around my house. She will have to know even if she is paying rent that is for her and her daughter not for her man to come lay up

I don't know what type of friend I would be if I knowingly let me friend become homeless. Sometimes you have to help people - even if that means giving up a little bit of your comfort for a while. It is only a short time. I would say put a time limit on it. Talk to her and explain your RULES to her and it is your home so you have every right to set rules. Put everything in writing including what will be automatic deal breakers. I am of the opinion that company should not have company. There is no reason for her bf to be posted up over your house. She can visit him at his home. And I absolutely would not put my son out of his room. I would say disrupt your home life as little as possible. Remember put everything in writing. EVERYTHING. But I do think you need to help your friend if she has no family and no where else she can turn. Moving in w/a boyfriend who has a teenage son is not a good move for her

Honestly.. if you do decide to have them come to live with you, and she is going to pay 400 a month.. thats okay, but as far as the rules go? i say NO boyfriend in the house at all. HE has a house, SHe can go there.. in fact, she really should do her best to spend most of her time there and maybe just sleep at your place. As for her child...be careful you don't become a babysitter.. if she wants to go hang with her man.. she may start to ask you to watch her daughter.

I think for a short term thing ( a month) this would be an OK set up, but i'm telling you.. alot of times this doesnt work out for the best. Perhaps if she can find someone else, another friend or fam. member that she can rotate houses with? like.. she comes to you for a week, then goes to the other person for a week?

Once a residency has been established by her paying you, you have to go through eviction if she doesn't want to leave. You could change the locks and the police show up and let her in. My daughter tried to be a good friend on two different occasions and let someone move in with her and her hubby. It rarely turns out well. The first friend didn't so much do things wrong herself, but when they were gone and she had people over for the night, they stole Jessica's Aerosmith complete box set I bought her and other CDs, movies and clothes. If she's paying rent, you can't really say who she can have over either. It then becomes a roomate situation, not guest with those kinds of rules. If your FMIL thinks this is a great idea, does she have room for her. You really don't. Why isn't this girls family taking her and the child in? They may know something you don't.

I'd do it. Just because I love my best friend like we were sisters and the situation she's in isn't the best and I have a small apartment and told her if things went south she could live with us regardless. But that's me everyone's different.

Ladies thank you so much!! Well I talked to her this morning and told her the rules. Like he bf can't sleep over. So she she called me back and told me that he is going to give her 500 to give her landlord and then she needs to tell the landlord to take it out of her deposit the rest that is owed but she hasn't even finished paying her deposit because it was split up and added to her rent. well I told her that is fine but she can not change her ind and say she needs to come. So good luck to her

Also the bf told her that if she is paying rent then she should be able to do whatever she wants. But I feel as when it all moils down this is my ouse and i am doing you a favor

I'm sorry but her boyfriend sounds like a jack@$$! If she is moving into your home then no she should NOT be able to do whatever she wants. If she wants to do whatever she wants she needs to figure out how to maintain her own space.

Trina, be careful. From what you are saying it doesn't sound like a good idea to let this friend move in. Read your lease at your apartment carefully. There may be rules about letting someone stay more than 7 days or more than 14 days with you.

I personally have had more than one really bad experiences with people staying with me. The first one was years ago while I was in college I let a friend stay with me. While she was staying with me she was also taking my mail and ended up opening credit cards in my name leaving me with identity theft.

The second situation was my husband letting his former roommate come stay with us right after we got married. His two weeks ended up being over 6 months. He finally left when he decided to move out of state with his girlfriend. It is really hard on a couple to have an outsider there, especially as you are trying to deal with things.

As others have set, set clear rules and make sure they are in writing. But most of all be careful.

Well thank goodness. sounds like her bf is not so great. but watch out for her too. it is nice to help out ppl who genuinely help themselves and are not clingy or users. they are just in a bind and appreciate it. there are too many users though...so just watch out. since you have so many doubts about her already and the situation, she doesn't seem like a good temporary roommate at all.

I didn't read all the other posts but my concern would be that this temporary thing would turn out to be much longer than what you're being told. My cousin moved into my house "just long enough to look for an apartment in my city" and then she would move out. Well, about one year later she finally moved out but that is because I had had enough, she never cleaned the place (I don't live there I live with my fiance) and made some comments that were very disrespectful considering I was letting her live there for free!! Many people told me that it was a bad idea to let her live there but I felt sorry for her. I'd have to say that I definitely learned my lesson from that experience!