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Just Said Yes August 2018

Is a welcome party or morning after brunch necessary?

Jordan, on July 11, 2018 at 4:09 AM Posted in Planning 0 18
58 out of 60 of our guests are from out of town and we are too. Our families are very spread out throughout the country and internationally. We chose to have our wedding in orlando because there is a major airport and its in the middle of us, my parents, and his parents.

With so many out of town guests, i cant think of a way to make a pre or post wedding event affordable. It would pretty much be a second wedding. Are these events necessary?

18 Comments

Latest activity by Jennifer, on July 18, 2018 at 1:12 PM
  • Neffe
    Master July 2020
    Neffe ·
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    Hi Jordan! Welcome to WeddingWire! Smiley ring No, these events aren’t necessary. Your wedding and reception are the specific events that will extend your hospitality!
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  • amandaaok
    VIP June 2018
    amandaaok ·
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    Necessary? Nope.

    Fun? yes.

    We did a "Welcome Dinner" because my now husband insisted on it - it is kind of a tradition in his family. I am SO glad he did. We just did a 3hr event with 2hrs of heavy hors d'ourves and open bar, on the rooftop patio of a hotel...in total it cost us an extra $1,300.00 that sure, we could have saved, but it was a nice, relaxing way to welcome everyone who traveled to be at our wedding, it gave people who didn't know each other a change to mingle and meet before being at a wedding/reception with strangers AND, BONUS, the town we got married in had A FIREWORK SHOW so we got an awesome view of that!

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  • WED18
    July 1993
    WED18 ·
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    Necessary, no. However, your entire guest list is traveling which is costly and time consuming for them. They're going to great lengths to be with you and for their effort, spending some extra time with them is always a good idea. Its not at all like a second wedding. Any pre or post wedding events can be less formal and way less expensive.

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  • Yoomie
    VIP October 2018
    Yoomie ·
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    85% of our 200 invited guests are OOT with a handful international. FMIL felt it was proper etiquette to provide a meal for their long travel the whole weekend, Rehearsal/Welcome Dinner and Day-After Brunch including Wedding. Both cases, since the crowd will be ~80-100 guests attending Welcome Dinner and Day-After Brunch respectively (150 guests to the wedding), we had to lay down a hefty minimum to rent out the majority of the restaurants to fit all the intended guests.
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  • DC Wife 10.27.18
    Master October 2018
    DC Wife 10.27.18 ·
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    Neither are necessary. We are doing both but only the Welcome Party will be hosted. We’re going to brunch the next day and just telling people where we’ll be if they want to come hang out before heading out of town.
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  • J
    Just Said Yes August 2018
    Jordan ·
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    That does sound really fun. We did look into providing appetizers at the hotel but it was just too expensive. Our wedding budget was only 7500 and we really wanted to be able to afford good food and wine at the reception. Unfortunately, not much is left over.
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  • J
    Just Said Yes August 2018
    Jordan ·
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    Wow that seems like a lot. Sounds like youre having a great wedding weekend though.
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  • J
    Just Said Yes August 2018
    Jordan ·
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    Yes, unfortunately, everybody is too spread out for us to have planned something that wouldnt have involved so much traveling. We arent trying to avoid spending time with everybody, we just cant afford to host another party.
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  • Courtney
    Devoted September 2018
    Courtney ·
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    Definitely not necessary, however my father in law very sweetly adjusted our rehearsal dinner to be more of a welcome party to allow all out of town guests to meet. We simplified the menu and made it more family style in a home he is renting from Airbnb. We are just running to Costco beforehand to pick up a few bottles of wine and some beer while keeping things very simple. Maybe if someone is renting a home with a yard for their stay see if it would be possible for people to gather there? Maybe parents would be able to rustle up a little bit of food or get it catered by a small local restaurant who can do things on the cheaper side.

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  • J
    Just Said Yes August 2018
    Jordan ·
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    Thats a great idea. So far, i dont think anybody is renting a home but i might be able to rent one myself for a day. Theres my mission for today! Thank you
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  • Courtney
    Devoted September 2018
    Courtney ·
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    Glad this idea helped! You could completely cater it with Costco bulk buy foods, if the house has an outdoor grill even better. Get someone in a cute apron and throw out burgers with salad, thats always the best menu for a family get together!


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  • B
    Super July 2018
    Brittany ·
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    If you can't afford it don't worry about it. As long as you're having food and drinks at your reception then you're being a good host and you don't need to overextend yourself.

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  • Jenna
    Super October 2019
    Jenna ·
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    If you could find a house to rent for the day or even the weekend, you can definitely get food and drinks at an affordable price from a restaurant (keep it casual like pizza or BBQ), or even pick up food from Costco like someone mentioned. Good luck!

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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    I don't think the post wedding brunch is necessary. If we do one, it will be planned very last if we can afford it. Honestly, if I'm a BM and traveling to a wedding, I'm exhausted the day after anyway! We are doing a RD with our immediate family, wedding party and their significant others and kids. It's already 42 people. If we did all family & out of town guests, it'd be like 115 people (so a second wedding like you said). After the RD, we are hanging out in the hotel bar for 1-2 hours and telling guests we will be hanging out if they want to say hi!

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  • FutureMrsKC
    Master January 2019
    FutureMrsKC ·
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    Definitely not necessary and we definitely cant afford it. All of my family is coming in from out of town but FH family is local. After our rehearsal dinner we plan to just tell people we will be at this bar from 9-11pm if you want to come say hi and have a drink! Nothing super planned or anything just a casual way to get people together if they want to.

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  • J
    Just Said Yes August 2018
    Jordan ·
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    So far, no luck finding a house thats affordable, close to the venue/hotels, and willing to do a short rental. Several of our guests have been making plans to go to disney world or universal though and many wont be there until the day of the wedding. Im guessing it will turn out ok.
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  • WED18
    July 1993
    WED18 ·
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    Glad it's working our for you. Maybe for those not doing touristy things, you can just let them know where you'll be and they can meet up for cocktails or something after dinner. If it's a casual meet up type of thing then guests will know that they're paying for themselves - but maybe you can buy a round or two.


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  • Jennifer
    Super December 2019
    Jennifer ·
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    We also live far from most of our family guests. We are thinking having a small rehearsal dinner for just wedding party and family (including OOT close family) with just pizza, wings and soda, possibly in the church hall if we can get it. We will either have brunch for just us and our bridal party (as a couple of my sisters live overseas so will only be there for that weekend and we want them included) or just treat the bridal party to brunch and tell others where we will be if they want to brunch there too.

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