Is a cash bar okay for wedding?

When we were opening cards/envelopes after our wedding, there were a few envelopes with cash that were not sealed. My DH told me some people keep the envelopes open just in case they have to dish out some cash for a cash bar... it will come directly from the cash gift .

I intend to do just that next time I attend a wedding.

I would look into a consumption bar or just doing a beer and wine bar. Cash bars are definitely frowned upon

Question: FILs are paying for the beverages, which I think would be just beer and soda. Should I try to ask them to include wine as well, or is this sufficient? (We're big beer drinkers because we're in Wisconsin, haha)

Would you invite your friends and family over, offer them a glass of wine or beer, then tell them "That'll be 8 dollars"? Having a cash bar is doing the same thing. Save an extra $20 each a week, and you'll have more than enough to cover an open bar by the time your wedding day.

It is always a bummer when I get to a wedding and learn that I have to pay for my drinks. It puts a damper on the entire evening. However, when I go to a wedding that is open bar, I am sooooooooooo excited and am pumped to have a great time!! So you may think that you cannot afford it but you should really reconsider so everyone has a great time. Find ways to save your money, adjust your lifestyle for the next year if you have to. You will be so much happier with your decision of having an open bar!

We did beer and wine only. It cost me less than $1500 for 120 guests. That's right, $1500 for 120 guests. It's called properly hosting , cutting things that need to be cut to host properly, and being proud that I could provide the level of "service" to my guests that we did.

Neuco I'm aware what it's like to struggle financially and we are paying for our own wedding. We're doing beer and wine only for a smaller guest list of 65 and it's affordable because we saved. Do you invite friends over for dinner and charge them for wine? No. So take your bitter pity party back to the excuse factory.

AwkwardToBe- I hate beer so would prefer a wine option, but if you're sure your whole crowd is beer drinkers...

And Neuco clearly wasn't in the middle of my finance-related mental breakdown this weekend...

Not everyone can have a 500-guest black-tie event- which is why not everyone has them. There are people here with a guest list of 10- but they're hosting those 10 and treating them to a party.

As a guest, I would definitely be put off by a cash bar. you wouldn't ask someone to pay for drinks at a nice dinner at your house would you? you're hosting your guests, host them properly.

Neuco - what a terrible post. You are basically telling someone to "go somewhere else so you will feel better" and not "go somewhere where you will get better advice".

We are not snobby or rich. We are hosting properly and helping others do the same within their budget. We are realists and will adjust our wedding expectations to ensure our guests have the best time whether it be 10 people or 300 people on a Sunday, Monday, Tuesday etc.

@Neuco my husband and I live paycheck to paycheck most months... And I have emergency room bills from an accident before our wedding. And now from another accident after the wedding. Granted medical bills can be put on a backburner... We know what struggling feels like every day. But we had an open bar.

When I saw the title of this post I thought it was someone just trying to make a joke. But in all seriousness, no please do not do a cash bar. It is extremely rude to ask your guests to open their wallets on your day. You need to properly host your guests. A cheaper option would be to offer beer and wine only. This is an acceptable way of hosting your guests. Just please do not make them pay for anything on your day. Would you invite someone over to your house and give them a drink and then say okay $5 please? It is not only being cheap, it is also being very rude to your guests.

@Nueco - GIRL (or boy) BYE!!!!!!!!!!

I can guarantee you lots of us know exactly what it's like to be poor. And therefore WE WOULDN'T BE HAVING A WEDDING WE COULDN'T AFFORD!

A wedding isn't a necessity, it's a luxury. It's not a need, it's a want.

Neuco - We are a one income household in a very expensive city. My property taxes just went up because we were deemed an "up and coming" neighbourhood. I have a small child who is "just" out of diapers, tell me again that I don't know what it's like to live without a lot of money!

We are having a very small wedding. 30ish people, but we may bring that down to 10-15 because we want to be able to host everyone properly with food and booze. Cut everything that you can and HOST the wedding you can afford.

@Neuco There are people here who DO know what it's like to be poor. There are probably people here who have grown up wondering where their next meal will come from, if they'll have a roof over their head tomorrow, or if they'll have shoes that fit for the next school year. THAT'S poor. You're not poor if you're hosting a wedding and choose not to do it properly (or maybe you are and your priorities are fucked up)...you're just being rude and cheap.

Neuco, you have the wedding you can afford regardless what your income is. Duh.

I also flagged your comment for telling OP to find another forum.

OP you might be really surprised at the cost of beer only. I know it is expensive to plan a wedding. But definitely look into it before you make a decision. Good luck I hope it works out for you!

Flagged Neuco for name calling.

Flagged for calling us prissy little brats. I assure you the brats are people who only think about themselves.

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