Inviting people to a joint bachelor/bachelorette who won't be invited to the wedding...

People who are invited to extra wedding events (bachelorette/bachelor parties, wedding shower) should 100% be invited to the wedding, it is in poor taste to invite people to events leading up to the wedding and not invite them to the wedding itself. No exceptions.

I agree with AJ. I wouldn't invite them to any pre-wedding events. If you really want to celebrate with anyone not invited to the wedding, I would maybe do something after you are married. You could also just...hang out with your friends. Not every gathering leading up to the wedding needs to be wedding related.

I wouldn't invite them unless you want to increase your wedding invite list.

I'm going to differ from PPs and say that if you are honest with them and these are your close friends, it might be okay. Everything is weird with covid and they will probably understand that you cannot adjust your actual wedding plan at this point but still want to celebrate with them. I personally went to a bridal shower and bachelorette party for a close friend who had a family-only wedding. There were several girls at her bridal/bachelorette weekend who ended up not being invited to the reduced-guest wedding and I think all of us understood the circumstances and we just had fun celebrating what we could!

I can understand being stuck with the venue since you already paid, but I think it’s going to be hard to use Covid as an excuse for things now that most states are fully open. I suppose you could talk to everyone and feel it out, but you could also just plan a friend trip that has nothing to do with the wedding at all.

The COVID situation has allowed for a loosening of etiquette rules, it's true. But I still think it's impolite to invite people to pre-wedding parties who aren't invited to the wedding. It's fine to want to celebrate with your friends, but why not just celebrate casually after your wedding, as friends do? There's no actual need to have friends pay to attend multiple parties/trips (you said you are having joint and individual parties) when they would probably be happier to just do something low key later.

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They wouldn't pay to attend this. It's just a house party, but I defintiely see your POV! Thank you for the feedback!

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Thanks for your input! This honestly made me feel better for even considering doing this. I feel like the people we would be inviting would totally understand. We're a very not traditional couple with very non traditional friends.

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Thank you for your input!

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Post idea celebration is a great idea! Or even just having a regular Halloween party.

View Quoted Comment Maybe just call it a party then and don't label it as a bachelor/bachelorette?

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Yes, will definitely consider this!

It's still a big no no. I'd just stick to just having only people invited to the wedding attending pre wedding events for the wedding.

I think it is okay to do this, especially because of COVID. I know restrictions are lifting now so some people may frown upon this idea, but I still think it is okay. My friend got married last October during COVID and there was one person at the bachelorette party that wasn't invited to the wedding. I think you know your crowd best so you know how they would take this information. If they're understanding people that want to have a good time with you, then I say go for it!