Inviting coworkers- but no plus ones.

Etiquette states that if they are married or engaged or now a days living with someone, you must invite the entire couple, sorry honey

Thanks, MissB!

Can't. Couldn't you maybe have a casual little get together (well, with 30 plus guests, it's no longer little...) when you get back?

No matter how close you are, I doubt that your co-workers would want to come without their partners.

Personally I don't care if I go to things without FI especially if people I know are going to be there.

(disclaimer: here it is perfectly acceptable to invite just one out of a couple so my view is probably coloured by the fact that it is usual in the UK)

I would talk to them...honestly.

It definitely makes sense, and in most countries outside of the US, this would not be an issue. But in the US, inviting SOs is not just so they won't feel awkward at the wedding, but is a sign of respect of that person's relationship.

There has been similar posts in the past, and one of the responses was "if you don't know them well enough to know their SO, then you don't know them well enough to invite them to your wedding"-- is there any way to invite only those co-workers you are closest to so that you can have room for their spouses?

If you are sure you want to invite all 30 without their SO, my only suggestion would be to talk to each one of them individually and explain the circumstances-- you are sorry you can't have their SO, but hope they will still join you on your special day. Reaching out to them personally and honestly is the only way I can think of not offending them. And of course, you need to treat all of your co-workers equally re: SOs-- if you make an (contd).

Exception for one of them, you will surely offend another one!

Well said Barbara.

@Diane-- you said it first, and in fewer words-- which is usually more effective

I'm on the same page as Ned G. I wouldn't be upset/offended being that I'm surrounded by familiar faces. I did have it in my budget to invite spouses, but a few of my co-workers decided not to come with their other half. I would discuss with each of them.

Thank you Barbara and Diane and JMedd. I really appreciate the time you took to respond!

It's a no. Unless you talk to each of them. I would find it odd if my FH wasn't invited :/

Good luck, Samantha! Let us know how it works out.

Yeah, you can't just invite them and not the husband/fiance/live in partner...you either invite no one, just invite close coworkers and their SOs, or invite everyone with SOs.

I actually can invite them without their SOs, however the point of the post was in regards to etiquette, Stacy.

What we did was if the person was married then their partner got invited as well. No live in partner or anything was invited. FH said "if married by law then you're both invited, if you're not well too bad."

I agre with asking them all personally.

The point of a wedding is to celebrate a relationship, and love. To not offer the SO an invite seems to counteract that symbol, IMO.