"I Suggest You Have Sex With Someone Else"

I wouldn't be okay with it, but I can understand how it works for some couples when done properly. Open relationships work for some, but not when they begin this way. I honestly would have more of an issue with the fact that my partner was putting me down for my weight.

I feel like this is a cop out used by cheaters to be honest. The point of marriage is to be there through thick and thin, literally and otherwise. I think if it's that big of a problem seeking counseling from a marriage or sexual professional is the right thing to do. Intimacy is multifaceted and if you're not visually attracted to someone you can find a way to use emotional intimacy to have sex.
No one has died from lack of sex, it's uncomfortable and maybe sad but sex is a want not a need, I believe in keeping it in your pants or using your hand if you're having problems.

No, I wouldn’t be ok with this but I have been in a situation where my (ex) spouse outright told me regularly he wasn’t attracted to me anymore after I gained weight following a miscarriage. It was devastating. Even if I had had the opportunity to, I wouldn’t have been able to have sex with someone else because of the emotional whirlwind I was in from hearing that. It took years of therapy to work on myself enough to not put my self-worth in someone else’s hands. Sex with someone else would have meant running from the problem, instead of fixing it.

View Quoted Comment Right?! That’s definitely the more messed up part of this hypothetical, the person that’s supposed to love you no matter what is disparaging you over something you have no control over at a time you’re already vulnerable. That’s the real issue, not sex.

I would not be ok with that at all

Not at all. I would hope that attraction from my deeper would run deeper than plus or minus 40 lbs, and if it is due to an injury that lack of support is beyond messed up and already a bad relationship. I can see attraction shifting if it was more than the physical (ie it’s not that you gained 50lbs but that you stopped taking care of yourself and changed the core of who you are [no longer driven, motivated, concerned for the future]), but even in a case like that, marriage means you work through that, together. Source the problem, seek help, be supportive. There’s A LOT of bodily issues that will come up over the course of a lifetime together; honestly if you’re not prepared or willing to work through that, and you’re attraction is so specifically limited to the physical, you’re not fit to be married— it’s losing sight of the core of the partnership.

I wouldn't cease to be attracted to my wife based on her weight. But if, for example, I had a medical condition that meant I could never have sex again, I would be fine with her having sex with someone else.

I was in a marriage before in which he stopped being interested in sex, and it was rough on both of us. I was frustrated that he wouldn't have sex with me; he was frustrated at being asked to do something that was beyond him. I strongly suspect that our mutual frustration was part of the marriage ending. I would much rather that both of us remain committed to the marriage than to create marital strain by forcing a partner to become celibate for life because I was no longer capable.

I personally wouldn't be okay with it. The thought of FH getting sexual pleasure from someone else would break my heart

This happened in my first marriage. I was too sick to be up for the act of sex but I still craved intimacy with my husband so much. I really feel as though it's a cop out. You have sex with your partner to perpetuate your bond. If you're not seeking to continue to provide intimacy with your partner in other ways that's not sexual while seeking sex outside of your relationship, you're a selfish person who doesn't really love their partner.

I also see the act of sex only acceptable in a marriage covenant for my own self (IDC what others do). For my husband to step outside of marriage and have sex with someone else I see it as a huge tear in our agreement to each other and not acceptable in God's eyes.

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Hmmm...I guess that arrangement would make it an open relationship. I hadn't considered that.

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I definitely think the guy was having sex with someone else for him to suggest his girlfriend to sleep with someone else.

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I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I'm glad you found someone who truly loves you.

I agree that telling your partner to just have sex with someone else is avoiding the problem.

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I completely agree, the issue is much bigger than sex.

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Please elaborate.

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"honestly if you’re not prepared or willing to work through that, and you’re attraction is so specifically limited to the physical, you’re not fit to be married— it’s losing sight of the core of the partnership."

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Would you then consider your relationship an open marriage?

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I feel the same way.

I would NEVER be okay with this!

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I suppose that would depend on one's definition of "open." Clearly only she, not I, would be having sex with someone else. But she would be doing so with my blessing.

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Why wouldn't you be okay with it?