I need to express my frustration ABOUT MY PRO PHOTOS

I'm sorry, you're nuts. 95 required pix? And you hired someone who has only done a couple of weddings and never a wedding ceremony?

You made your own mess here. You hired a semi pro who has little experience with the rapid fire series of events that happen at a wedding, you gave him a sick amount of things to shoot and I betcha you didn't have a person from each side to direct traffic.

Your expectations were out of line for any pro, especially one who doesn't shoot weddings.

I'm sorry you're upset, but this is insane.

Ok, I started to do this to my photographer. Sending her specific shots, etc. She said to me "I'll do whatever you want, but let me suggest this.....give me about a dozen MUST HAVE photos. Then, tell me moments and feelings you want captured. Trust me.". It was like heaven shined down on me. Did we miss a few I think I would have liked? Of course. Did we get some adorable ones I NEVER would have thought of? Absolutely!! I know its after the fact, but did your pictures capture your day? You can't change it now, so focus on the ones you love

Because that's all we had the budget for. We were the ones who paid for everything except the food and my husband is the only one that worked so we didn't have any way for anything else. He was highly recommended by our friends so we went with him. Yes, I do wish we could have had another person but we couldn't. Blame money...

Ok I just went through my photo list, I have 166 things on there. Of course a lot of them are like 1) jewelry, 2) shoes...etc. If they put both shoes and jewelry in the same picture that's fine. But a lot of it is to make sure they are aware of the details. We have really nice champagne flutes and programs I DIYed so I want them to know about that stuff. I don't expect them checking off every single one of those, but the formal ones I DO expect them to check off the list. FH and I do wedding photography and we specifically ask for shots of formals and if it isn't organized, we organize it from biggest group to smallest so that people can leave when they're no longer needed. The photographer should have definitely gotten the things on your list and had it with them. If a bride and groom come up with a small list it actually is harder for me because I don't know all of the details and most important things and I get more worried that I'm missing things. For example, the last wedding we shot had something like 30 tables of people. We did not go around to take pictures of people at each table mostly because it would take too much time, but some actually like to have that of their guests. If the bride and groom had said they wanted it, we of course would have taken it. I'd rather have too much on a list than to have a bride come back unhappy that we didn't take a picture we didn't know they wanted. So being thorough in your list is perfectly fine. The fact that they disregarded it so much is pretty upsetting. I would be happy as a photographer to get your list (maybe it's because I like details) but I would make sure that all those formals were taken. I mean not a single picture of your groom with his groomsmen?? That is just not okay!

Now most pro photographers don't need such a thorough list. They know to take pictures of the shoes, they know to get a bride and her MOH, and I know our photographer will know those things. But they may not know I decorated the bottom of my shoes for example so that's why it is on the list. It sounds like your photographer wasn't a true wedding pro, so a list like that should have been followed exactly since they otherwise wouldn't know what is important. They may not know a picture of the bride and MOH is important. So I think you are fair for complaining about not getting your shots, I'd be very upset too. I would say something to the photographer.

Also, did you plan for 5 hrs of pictures alone? My photographer said to plan for 5 minutes per group. So I nixed my 50 super specifics and said "bride with parentsbrother". I'm sorry your photographer didn't know enough about weddings to be able to communicate that that was an unrealistic list.

I don't know how recent you got married but I got married in early May. After the wedding, I was thinking of stuff I should have done or not done blah blah...basically agonizing on stuff that I can not change. Most of us probably spend an average of one year (some longer, some shorter) planning the perfect wedding. All of a sudden it is over and you have a "oh shit what I am going to do with all this time" moment and then you look back at all the things that went wrong...

Try to focus on all the positives because all the negative stuff is going to drive you up the wall. It is not like you can't turn back the clock and do it all over. I am trying to not think of my negative stuff as I am typing this.

No, blame yourself. Most of the couple here pay for themselves.

I'm sorry, but there is no way one photographer could get all these shot by himself in one day. Also, if you have high expectations, you hire a 2 man professional team with an assistant.

HiH, my photographer said the exact opposite of you. I brought up my custom veil and all of that. She told me to fill out a pre wedding survey with the TOP details and to trust her. The photos where the bridesmaids do mock poses? That's pretty ridiculous to pantomime out since all of that is central to a photographers style.

Thank you HIH

HIH this is the difference between hiring a pro and hiring a novice/new photographer. I have worked with my photographer and I know that all of the Ops first 20 things are part on my photographers basic list that she does for all weddings, I don't need to tell her to get a shot of my dress or my jewelry, and even if there was something on the bottom of my shoes I would probably put it on the list but when she would go to take a photo of my shoes (which is on her basic.shot list) she would have seen the writing.

I have dabbled in wedding photography my self and yes I would want those detail shots done but I would not have buried my Must Have portraits in the middle if my shot list, those Should have been the first ones.

eta: basically i am sorry OP but your photographer was not prepared, but that is why you hire pros that know what the are doing. even if its just for enough time to do the ceremony and portraits.

@HIH, I think you should lower your expectations before the big day. With a list of 166 must have details, the photographer(s) is bound to miss something unless you have like 10 or more photographers (each taking like 16-17 items). My photographers were professional and they missed some stuff and I didn't have nearly that many on my list.

Our portraits with various groups and family were done in 25 minutes. Everyone was standing by and ready. How organized were your BP and family? Were they right there waiting as a group? If they weren't it's equivalent to asking the photographer to herd a bunch of cats. I suspect there is plenty of blame to go around.

Okay...saying that you can "blame money" is BS. FH and I are lying for every single thing ourselves. We unexpectedly had his mom pay for our invites ($250), which honestly went into the unexpected expenses category. Our photographer was really honest with me - 20 must have shots, tops. "If you like my style, you'll like the product I deliver to you..." I know he's only one person, and I don't expect too much of him. I just want a the basic family shots and FH and I together. In other words, I have reasonable expectations- I know he is human, and there is only one of him. All said and done, you have photos of your wedding, and you should work with what you have. What's done is done.

I'm so sorry!

Most photographers will be able to recognize all of the details, but it is nice to let them be aware of them in advance. And after taking a closer look at the OP's list there are a lot on there that a regular photographer should know to do. Like pictures of the first dance, etc. But since the OP knew that this photographer wasn't big in wedding photography I think it is completely appropriate to give a list of photos. Now if like 10-15 were missed (like maybe the specific posed ones of the bridesmaids looking like the groomsmen) that wouldn't really kill me. But to miss more than half of those is bad. Sure she should have hired someone better, she admitted that already. But providing a list like that should be more helpful to someone that isn't used to it. I know I could just give my list of formals/combinations and that would be enough I'm sure, but I really just want them to be aware of all the other things we have so they can look out for it and remind me of it when it's on that day.

The person that said it takes 5 minutes per combination...that is really extreme. A picture with bride and mom and then a picture with bride and dad should take at most 1 minute each. If the photographer has the right photo settings there should be no issue. Of course it takes longer to do a picture with all the aunts, uncles, and cousins but OP's list did not have a bunch of huge family combinations. They were in fact pretty basic.

So yes some photographers may not need a full list if they're experienced but I think the OP provided a list to help the photographer that she knew was new to this. If he wanted to do a good job he should have just followed that list. I know if the OP hadn't provided a list and hired a $4k photographer she would have gotten all 95 pictures probably. But, since she didn't it was important to give him 95 pictures so that she could help him along. She couldn't trust that he'd know those things or look them up in advance, so I feel like it was perfectly okay.

Now in my situation, I'm giving 166 pictures and my photographer will probably just read through them just to have a general idea, I don't expect them to keep looking at except for the combinations of people. If I do just combos of people I have 47 pictures. The rest are mostly so they have an idea of what else we're having. Photos is #1 to us since we do photography, and luckily we were able to hire the $4k photographer so I know that even without that list I'd be okay, but I just want to give them everything whether they want to do anything with it or not is up to them. I also have a preamble that explains these are just all the details we're having so we just hope they can capture most of them.

That list is crazy! I mean good for you that you thought of everything but I got tired just reading it. I feel like everything was soo back to back I just picture a photographer literally running in my head from shot to shot. Much like the roadrunner. Are there pictures you didn't have in mind that he took and surprised you?

That is a lot of specific pictures for someone who is not a professional to take. I understand you are frustrated but at least you got some good ones you do like/asked for.

I 100% agree with KM why didn't you hire a professional?

@Ms2Mrs, the list she had is actually quite standard and most pro photographers would easily be able to achieve a list like that over a 5-6 hour event. I would say that some of those pictures could be done before the ceremony (ones with bridesmaids, etc) and then that's the whole point of cocktail hour, you could easily get those combinations done in an hour, when I was in my sister's wedding we easily got through a number of combinations like that. This is why after a wedding I'm usually quite sore and my feet are tired, it does take a lot of work, but this list that the OP gave is something every pro photographer should easily be able to do. And since she knew her photographer wasn't a pro, she gave him this list to give him direction. I think it was really smart for the OP to do this, and I would have suggested doing the same. I think that when you pay for someone's services and outline EXACTLY what you want and it is actually a reasonable list to me, then that photographer should at least come close to delivering that product. I could look at the last wedding we photographed and even though we didn't get a list like this from the bride and groom, I'm sure we had all of them (except specific cases like bride with aunt, our bride had different family members that were important to them). I would see a problem if the bride asked for like all kinds of strange poses, but these are standard. I don't get tired looking at that list, I think it's fine!