How to throw a rehearsal dinner?

On another note. It's probably not smart to throw around words like "abused" and "bullied". It's highly insensitive to those who have been abused and bullied, online and in real life.

No potluck. I agree with others with it being fine to have something as simple as pizza and beer as long as you are fully hosting. You could look for local bbq or pizza joints and see if they have sectioned off rooms if you don't want to worry about clean up, high costs, etc...

Abused and bashed. Wow. BTW, I read your other post and couldn't find where you were abused or bashed. We will not sugar coat things so you can swallow terrible ideas easier. No to the potluck.

Your approach here really isn't the best way to get help. "Yall are all meanies, please don't be a meanie to me". Makes me really want to be helpful...

The rehearsal dinner is to thank the people who attended the rehearsal. Since you're thanking them, you need to pay for everyone at the dinner. So if you don't have a rehearsal you won't have to worry about a rehearsal dinner.

If you're having a rehearsal, the people required to attend other than you and FH are: officiant, BP, parents, siblings, and anyone else involved with the ceremony (such as the people doing any readings).

You'll need to extend the rehearsal dinner invitation to the spouses/significant others of the people at the rehearsal.

ETA: you can order pizza and have the rehearsal dinner at home. It doesn't have to be a fancy dinner.

Are people really commenting on whether or not she was bullied? Ladies, just stop it. It matters how she felt, not how you interpret what was said. If she didn't like it, then it was inappropriate. We all know social media leaves out facials, voice inflections and other nonverbals. Heck all the exclamation points and caps leave a person feeling a little talked down to. Answer the question and move on. No need to bash someone's thoughts over a honey fund, potluck rehearsal, or anything.

PS - keep the rehearsal simple, I'm paying for my wedding as well and an extra meal can be pricey. I think the pizza, tacos type ideas are the way to go.

Christine, I have read both posts and no one was mean to you or bullied you. You were given basic etiquette advice (don't host your own party).

At a minimum, RD include the entire BP & their SO. You do not need to invite OOT guests. It does not need to be fancy or held at a restaurant. We are having a Low Country Boil at our house for the RD.

We are having a Taco night for our rehearsal dinner at our house and are having the bridal party and our parents attend. Inexpensive and informal. Just to get it out the way.

Im doing a small rehearsal dinner. You defiantly need to pay for it though

"It matters how she felt, not how you interpret what was said. If she didn't like it, then it was inappropriate."

WW users felt she was naming calling us bullies, abusers, and bridal bashers, we didn't like this and felt it was inappropriate, therefore we spoke to this issue.

Yes, it's tacky to expect your guests to pay for the RD.

Personal accontability and responsibility has left the building. @FutureMrsColeman - if what you are saying is true, then there is no need for etiquette, or even this forum.

Feedback was provided that was actually supportive. OP needs to be accountable for her own feelings, especially when they are off the mark

We aren't having a rehearsal the night befire, but we are having everyone meet at the local gaming store for dinner and board games the night before the wedding. My future in-laws are getting pizza and the stuff to make salads, and we are picking up a few cases of pop.

A rehearsal dinner is what you have after you do your wedding rehersal / run through for the wedding. You're basically just feeding people who took the time to go to the run through of the wedding (bridal party, officant, parents.) A reception is the actual party with cake, dancing, bridal party speeches and all of your guests. Guests of either event do not, under any circumstance, pay for their own food or drink at either event. Rehearsal dinners are often just in a large room at a restaurant and there may be a single speech by either the couple or the groom's family thanking everyone.

Unfortunately, it's considered rude to have your guests pay for their own meal at a rehearsal dinner. As PPs have said, a rehearsal dinner is thrown after doing a rehearsal of your wedding (run through of events). It's a way to feed/visit with your guests the night before the wedding and thank them for being a part of your day. If you want to save money keep it low key (pizza, backyard BBQ, etc.) or don't do a rehearsal at all if it's something you really can't fit into your budget. If you do choose to have one, you only need to invite parents, those involved in the wedding, and their SOs (OOT guests are not necessary IMO). Good luck

We did pizza and it was both inexpensive fun.We had 50 people and We Paid For It Ourselves And It Was Around $600. This was just bridal party and families and immediate family. This is supposed to be paid for not and not to be paid for by people you invited to it.

Our wedding was OOT for all of our guests. We hosted a 'Welcome Dinner' for people who may have already made it to town and invited our full guest list. It was a nice way to welcome them to the city. Note: we rented out a room at a restaurant and they provided the food.

There was no bullying on her other post, but I can pretty much guarantee you that she will feel the same way about this one. Because pretty much everyone told her to pay for it.

How dare we.

Calling people disagreeing with bad ideas "bullying" is an insult to people who have actually been bullied.

You have to pay. Order pizza and call it a day. You only have to invite wedding party and others that have to attend the rehearsal and their SOs, immediate family, and grandparents. We don't have a bridal party so only parents, siblings, grandparents, our FGs and their parents...total of 15 people.

You need to pay for the RD (or sometimes parents host). You're correct that only the BP, their spouses, and immediate family are invited. Anyone else involved in the ceremony should be invited too, like readers. The whole point is to thank your bridal party! This is when the bridal party and family thank you gifts are typically given out. I would say a few words of thank you but it doesn't have to be something formal or rehearsed. It can be formal like in a restaurant or it can be casual, like a backyard BBQ or pizza and beer.

Also, please change your avatar to something other than the rings. You can find the directions here: https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-forums/welcome-new-users-faq-lingo-and-guidelines/736e1073af1a0860.html