How to tell my parents i want to marry young?

As for the GI bill, you won't qualify until he has served 2 years I believe. And you'll only be able to use it if he doesn't choose to. The deployment could also change drastically, so I wouldn't count on it being late 2020. If you don't need their financial support (nor use it now), I would just tell them and accept that it may cause strain in your relationship. You have to choose what's right for you in your adult life.

His need to have your fathers permission is unsettling to me at best and downright scary at worst. My FH did ask for my father's blessing, but we were getting engaged either way. If you boyfriend needs your fathers permission before proposing that just seems so wrong. You are both adults, you don't need anyones permission to do anything and if he won't propose without it, I'd run super far away. It means he sees you more as a possession of your fathers and his than as an equal partner who can make her own decisions.

Also, it doesn't seem from your comments like you have ever lived alone. I would highly advise you to get your own apartment in this year and live alone. The first year I lived totally by myself I grew into a completely different person. You will be spending a lot of time alone with a husband deployed, I would hate to see you follow the path of many military wives who only grow once their husband is away and then aren't compatible when he returns.

Your parents have rights to raise concerns. My friends who married at 22/23/24 either had a VERY rough few years of marriage or are divorced. None of them had a super smooth sailing time because who you are at 22 is a very different person than who you are at 28. (And they weren't dealing with a long distance relationship)

DH and I knew we were going to get married day 2 of dating, when we were 19/18. We had known each other for just over a year at that point. That was two and a half years ago, and we just got married in July at 22/21. It's hard being married this young, but it's not something we regret at all. One of the huge things that made us okay with getting married so young was that each set of parents were 100% on board. We were already confident, but having that boost from our parents made all the difference. I totally understand why your guy wants to have your dad's approval.

You can do this, but it does take work. Make sure you do pre-marital counseling too. Even if he's "the one" there's bound to be things popping up in the next two years. Like Kristen Bell and Dax Sheppard have said (paraphrasing): do you take the car to the shop for routine maintenance and catch an issue early or do you wait until the engine has blown up on the side of the road and have it towed?

Yes I did read all the responses and you gave your reasons, it still scares me and I really don't care if you take offense to that. No person who sees you as an equal needs someone else's permission or they won't marry you. It is great to have your parents 100% on board with what you do and it is amazing to want that. But what if they won't give it? You will never get married? You (or boyfriend) will throw away this relationship that you are so set on marrying young because one person didn't agree? (Which is what you are saying when you say it is necessary) You can want it and treasure it, but need it or the marriage won't ever happen? That last part is the part that isn't okay.

I don't think your age necessarily matters as much as the length of time you've been together.

Less than a year sounds very fast. I would do what PPs are suggesting and wait a bit. This will give FH time to get to know your family better and vice versa. It will also give you guys time to get to know one another better.

Additionally, it sounds like marrying a military man can be tough at times so I would take the time to get to be with each other longer before you jump into getting married. If you know he is the one then waiting a bit won't matter.

My husband and I met freshman year of college and dated for 10 years before we got married. I know that if we had gotten married earlier that we would be totally different people than we are now and it for sure would have been harder. But over the years we've grown together and are way more set to be married than we would have been in the past.

I'm the mom of a bride who will be just short of 24 when she gets married. She and FSIL met as freshmen in HS and started dating their sophomore year. They've both finished college and he earned a teaching credential and she's completed certifications in her field. They are both working full-time in their careers, and at the time of the wedding will have lived together for about two years. Neither we nor his parents have any concerns about their ages because they have demonstrated that they are fully-functioning adults. So, I am not necessarily against "younger marriages," but I am very concerned about the picture you've painted in your original post. You literally said you need to get out of your parents' "toxic" household but can't afford to do so without your boyfriend's (financial?) help. As Cuoghi pointed out, the primary reasons you've given for getting married are financial. Your post makes it sound like this possible marriage is an escape for you.... In my opinion, that's not a good motivation for you and it's not fair to FH. Many pps, who are very familiar with the military and military marriages, have given you good advice. I agree with others who've said if you are in love and meant to be together, waiting a few years to get engaged and married won't change things. I'd encourage you to concentrate on gaining your own financial and emotional independence from your parents. That doesn't mean you can't love them and have a close relationship, but I'm a firm believer that only independent adults should get married, so I'd concentrate on that first. Good luck to you!