How to politely tell our guests absolutley no children?

We did not want any kids at our wedding so on our invatation it says “please respect our wishes this is an adult only reception” no one was offended and I addressed only the guests on the envelope. However people are still trying to bring their kids so it’s stressful either way telling them they can’t.

If your family already knows and is balking at no kids, why do you think adding anything to the invitation or website will change that? You just have to keep telling them that kids aren't invited. I would invite those that are breastfeeding. Yes, mom can pump and leave bottles for the sitter, but what is she supposed to do for those hours she is at your wedding and reception? Haul her electric pump around your reception? Do you even have a private place where the moms could pump? Where would they store the breast milk?

I don't think OP was asking how to follow etiquette at this point, it seems she just wants the best sentence possible to put on her invites to avoid confusion, despite whether or not it's considered rude. While it's not ideal, it's a really small thing.

OP - I understand the frustration. It's amazing how many people don't read or disregard rules in place because they think they and their children are the exception. I, too, had an adult-only reception (minus our ring bearer and breastfed babies, which none were there) because my family is MASSIVE and already taking 60/100 spots. I couldn't squeeze in one more person and had to make the cutoff at kids of cousins.

It's true that there really isn't a way to put that on your invites without it being rude, but I think your best bet will be something short and to the point. Don't to a little poem, don't do a saying, don't mention that the parents "need a night out," just be frank. I broke the etiquette rule and put "-adult only reception-" in very small print at the very bottom of my invite, and left it at that.

To further help people who still didn't understand, I had the "We reserved ___ seats in your honor" and the "___ out of ___ attending" with some of those lines pre-filled, indicating just the couple was invited.

And lastly, I made a slightly longer note on my website on the online RSVP page that said: "Due to the guest limitation of our venue (and Kelsey's massive family), we are unable to extend the invitation to children and extra guests."

After all that, yes, I still got questions about kids being invited, but everyone was really super awesome about it (I know some aren't as lucky).

Just know that whatever you put on the invite may put off some of your guests and you may want to consider just having it on your website instead.

Honestly though, not making an exception for breastfed babies is going to be much more of a problem than guests thinking 3 words on your invite being rude. Be prepared to get a lot of declines - babies that young are very reliant on mom and not just for food.

View Quoted Comment I dont need your sass. I do care about being polite. Thats why I posted this in the first place-to see how others are dealing with the issue.

View Quoted Comment I just hope. for our sakes that they dont end up bringing the kids

View Quoted Comment Your title is literally "How to politely tell our guests absolutely no children?"

View Quoted Comment Im.not even going to address this issue because Im not worrying about that

View Quoted Comment

She asked how to do this politely, yet is not willing to accept that there is no way to do this politely.

"I'm wondering how to politely ask our guests to not bring their children to our wedding in our invitations."

View Quoted Comment Thanks.

I know how babies work. Theynwont be super "newborn" by my wedding and I think they will be fine.

View Quoted Comment I def9nitely understand what you're saying, but I just wanted to point out that many women cannot pump and many babies won't take a bottle.


Some invitees may be totally unable to leave their small babies. OP, since it's clear you don't care about that, just say adults only. If they bring their babies anyway, have your security remove them. That's really all you can do.

View Quoted Comment Giving you the advice you asked for is not sass. You asked how to do this politely, yet reject the information that it is not polite.
Those of us familiar with good etiquette are trying to help, but despite asking for help on a public forum, you really aren't interested.

View Quoted Comment Omg drop it what is your problem

View Quoted Comment

It's a public forum, Gabby. No one person gets to cast shade on a person or their advice, and call an end to the conversation.

View Quoted Comment Babies can often be breastfed up to one year and past.
The mother will determine whether her child will be fine or not. Be prepared for declines if you don't make an exception for breastfed babies and some mothers conclude their baby will not be fine.

View Quoted Comment But apparently you don't like it when someone ignores your advice. I get it- I can't do it "Politely" THANK YOU.
Its a public forum Muriel.

View Quoted Comment Im honestly not worried about the declines.
Again, I understand how children work and I just want peoples ideas on what they are putting on their invites/websites/etc....

View Quoted Comment Put adult only on your website and address the invitations as you’ve been instructed, that’s all you can do short of hiring a bouncer. Make sure VIP family members keep spreading the word. Your looking for a unicorn and you’re not going to find it. People will be offended and it will blow over after the wedding.

Okay, great. I was just trying to help you not be surprised.
If you have had a baby before, you would know that being "super newborn" was not the only qualifier for being breastfed which you implied it was.
I already offered my advice on what you asked for, so have a nice night.

View Quoted Comment How about including a poem? Lots of people ask for a cutesy poem as a way of telling people something.

Don't bring your kids
Our vision forbids
you having them there
to get in our hair
Leave them at home
And you come alone
I know this is not right
But keep them out of our sight!

Most people here give information related to ETIQUETTE yet ironically family members outside of those planning an event such as a wedding are not present on these forums and probably do not know etiquette! ESPECIALLY family, hence the need for such a topic discussion anyway because they assume the request does not apply to them. People that are unfamiliar with etiquette assume an invitation addressed to the adults by name is simply just missing children's names if the children are family/close.

OP, I understand what you are saying. Unfortunately I don't think there is a polite way to convey your request! The PP that wrote "Adults only Please" may be the nicest way, but ultimately you're faced with either be ignored (which is rude of your guest) or you be direct (which will possibly be received as rude) but may give the result you desire. Sorry, thats all I got. This thread was...woosah!