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Modesty
Savvy July 2020

How explain “adults only” on an invitation?

Modesty, on April 11, 2020 at 5:36 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 18
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Hi there. How do we explain adults on an invitation without being rude? Lol I’m a first timer so I want to make sure it is professional as possible. If you all will or had an adults only wedding, would absolutely appreciate your advice! Thank you and have a blessed day. Smiley smile

18 Comments

Latest activity by Judith, on April 13, 2020 at 12:48 PM
  • Belle
    VIP August 2022
    Belle ·
    • Flag
    Just add “Adult Only”. That’s what’s on my friend’s wedding invitation and no one was offended.
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  • Modesty
    Savvy July 2020
    Modesty ·
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    Thank you so much!!
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  • Modesty
    Savvy July 2020
    Modesty ·
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    Sorry guys. A few typos lol
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  • Belle
    VIP August 2022
    Belle ·
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    Hehe... I hate it that we can’t edit our posting or even delete it. 😫
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  • Modesty
    Savvy July 2020
    Modesty ·
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    Right! 🤣 ...
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    I just addressed the invitations to those actually invited then on the reply card I wrote we have reserved x number of seats for you. I did include on our wedding website that it was adults only.
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  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    Address the invitation to those who are invited and specify how many seats you have reserved for them on the RSVP card.
    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Expert October 2021
    Lisa ·
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    We will be having adults only at our wedding and will be addressing the invitations to the adults. And on the invitation we’ll say something like “adults only reception to follow”. Also put it on our website.
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  • Arayia
    Savvy March 2020
    Arayia ·
    • Flag
    For our wedding we put adult only on the RSVP card and also included how many seats we were saving per person “2 seats were reserved in your honor Mr./Mrs. Smith”
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  • Wendy
    Super August 2021
    Wendy ·
    • Flag
    I added “Adults only” on the save the date and the invite.. straight forward, no confusion.
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  • Courtney
    Dedicated October 2021
    Courtney ·
    • Flag

    On the envelopes, address only to the people invited, ex. Mr & Mrs. Alex Smith, which should give most people the hint, rather than Mr. & Mrs. Alex Smith and Family. Also, on the invitation themselves, or the details card, you can have "adults only reception to follow" or whatever your case is.

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  • Ashley
    Savvy June 2020
    Ashley ·
    • Flag

    Here's my RSVP and I'm thinking it gets the message across! For the adult parents, I'm putting "2" in the second blank.


    How explain “adults only” on an invitation? 1

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  • Modesty
    Savvy July 2020
    Modesty ·
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    Thank you so much for advice .
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  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
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    It really should not say adults only on the invitation. It should be addressed to those invited. If you think they will overlook that a bring kids, take time to be specific on the RSVP card. Don't do numbers attending, numbers declining. Write out each name of those invited.
    Mr. James Cameron will/ will not attend. meal choice: chicken/lobster/veg lasagna
    Ms. Louise Martin will/will not attend. Meal choice: etc. Don't leave blanks for them to fill in any more names. You do individual names right on the RSVP. If the wedding is for adults, use your website, but something exclusionary does not belong on an invitation. And some people, seeing adult, with spaces, will include all kids over 12 they think can behave in an adult setting. And fill in names. You will do better if you clearly have no place to increase numbers. ( Fewer people saying hubby can't come so I wrote in my mother, too.) The 20 seconds it takes to put names next to Printed will / will not attend and meals choices makes the point twice, politely.
    • Reply
  • Melanie
    Dedicated April 2021
    Melanie ·
    • Flag
    I just informed everyone it was kid free with an “adults only” invite. Everyone seemed to be okay with it except for 1 couple...
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  • Sherry
    Master September 2019
    Sherry ·
    • Flag

    We provided an insert with our invites that were going to households with children that said...

    "Parents, we want you to be able to fully enjoy the wedding so we are requesting that all kiddos be left at home. thanks so much and we hope that you can celebrate with us on our special day!"


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  • Katharine
    Expert July 2021
    Katharine ·
    • Flag

    We didn't put it on the invites. We had conversations with each guest who has kids about it, and also put a note about it on our wedding site int he RSVP section as a reminder.

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  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
    • Flag
    A lot of people are advising you to put adults only, or no kids references ( it is a night out without the kids.). ..... In the end, you can do what you want. But know that conventional etiquette, long term and now, is that you never say anything to indicate anyone is not invited, or that there are restrictions on who is invited , you never mention gifts, and you never mention color or style of dress, only formality, on an invitation. Weddings are a multigenerational thing, and a lot if people do agree with standard manners. And will think you impolite if you write, adults only, or no kids, on the invitation. ....A lot of people on WW, particularly ones with little experience with weddings, think it does not matter. And advise all kinds of things that are mostly considered bad manners, or a total ignorance of good manners. This is one of those things. There are lots of ways to let people know, not on the invitation, that are fine. Including Saves, an informal communication, where you may say, we are having fun planning an all adult formal affair, something neither of us has done before. And your wedding website. But if you put it on invitations themselves, the first impression many people will get of your wedding will be, what a shame their families never taught them good manners. So, do as you like. But be aware that a lot of people are recommending something considered bad manners, not acceptable amongst polite society.
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