How do i enjoy my wedding day?

We visited every table and mingled with all 150 of our guests, and still ate food, danced our asses off, and had the best day of our lives. Not sure what's depressing about the idea of having 150 of your loved ones together in one room and spending time with them? Or why you're even inviting all of them if it's such a chore for you. "It reminds me of my graduation party how i had to answer the same 3 questions 80 times when i wanted to go play volleyball with my buddies." I mean, really? Why are you inviting all of these people if that's how you feel about spending time with them at your wedding? Just for gifts?

I had just shy of 200 guests and managed to talk to every single one of them, ate my food (except dessert, too busy dancing), danced the entire time the band played, and had piles of fun.

What I did to be able to do that:

- hire quality vendors. Hire people who know what they are doing and are on top of their $h*t. Only hire people who are prompt in their response to you and when they do respond are 100% accurate about the details you have communicated.

-Hire a day of coordinator (ideally, one who actually takes over a few weeks out. Because they really can't coordinate much the day of if they don't control the prep 3+ weeks out). See above advice about hiring vendors. This vendor needs to be on it. They should be able to point out things you missed!

-Do your photos before the ceremony. FH and I did our couples and wedding party pics before the ceremony. We only had to do family photos and a few others after the ceremony. This gave us time to mingle at the reception (I literally made it 10 feet in and didn't move as I had so many people talking to me. Luckily my bridesmaids are the greatest people ever and brought me food and drinks). Also, have your venue put 1 of each appy in a small room for you and FH so that you can escape and eat a little bit before you go out and mingle. Ensuring you have access to food and water at all times is really key to a happy day.

-Visit your guests at dinner. It's easier to make sure you talk to each guest by doing it when they are at their tables. Start with family and family friends, because you are more likely to be able to connect with your friends on the dance floor if you run out of time during dinner. Make sure your caterer knows to go ahead and serve the courses even if you aren't at your table. If you are doing buffet, have someone make you guys plates first, mingle, then eat. Expect the same few phrases and questions (congrats! how does it feel? what are you doing for your honeymoon?) and be ready to answer with a smile. If a conversation is dragging on, you say "I can't wait to catch up with you more, but I need to make sure I make it to the other tables before dinner is over. See you on the dance floor!"

Also, adjust your expectations! Your wedding is not only about you and your FH. It's about the people you chose to celebrate this milestone with you (your guests). Thank them for the time and energy and thought they put into celebrating your day with you! Making sure I thanked each person for being there and giving them a bit of my time was so important to me. All of the love and kindness I felt when I talked to each guest made me feel really good.

If you approach like "ugh, I have to talk to every person and answer the same things, what a drag", then yeah, you aren't going to enjoy it. But if you change your mindset to focus on the positive aspects (150 people supporting and congratulating you), it won't feel like a chore. And if it really feels like a chore to talk to so many people, maybe you need to narrow down your guest list to only the people you actually want to make sure you talk to on your wedding day.

Giirrllll, I FEEL YA! I hated having to go around and talk to everyone at my grad party and do not want to waste time and do it at my wedding. I am having close to 200 guests and honestly don't want to talk to most of them. (I know that sounds rude, but they are mostly my aunts/uncles/cousins that I haven't seen in ten years. And trust me, I have already gotten lectured on not wanting to invite them, but have to because they are "family"). Anyway... our photographer actually suggested a receiving line like traditional church weddings. We aren't getting married in a church, but it will still work. It may take a longer before you can get to the photos and cocktail hour might extend a few minutes, but then you get to say that you at least saw and hugged everyone of your guests and not feel guilty about actually enjoying your wedding. You will also eat first and then you can mingle when you are done when most of the guests are finishing their meals. Plus you can dance with anyone who comes to the dance floor! It may be a little rude, but don't feel obligated to have a conversation with every single guest. A good "hi, how have you been? thanks for coming" is completely fine. It's your day! With all the planning and stress, you should be able to enjoy being in love and celebrate your marriage on your wedding day! Good Luck!

View Quoted Comment I love all my guests! I ment that i was under the impression that I needed to have a conversation with every single guest and they would ask me repetitive questions like "so where are you going to live" ext. Most of the guests at my FH so if have a smaller wedding if i could. I just had some misconceptions that other kind people in this forum helped me with.

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I am also inviting over 250 guests and I hoping that most of them decline or not show up. I have a huge family (literally over 125 with just my aunts/uncles/first cousins) who most of them I haven't seen in at least ten years. I am having to turn down inviting some of my friends for my "family" to be invited. I feel like my wedding will be more of a family reunion before it is a celebration of our marriage. Since my parents are helping me pay for the wedding, I have to respect their wishes and invite my family. I'm not going to disrespect my parents when they are the ones paying for all the food and renting the space. It's not just for gifts. I am extremely jealous of the ones who actually like to go around and talk to each one of their guests because they truly care for each other, not going around and most of you guests asking how you've been for the last ten years and what your doing with yourself now. I'm not trying to be rude to your comment, but I feel where other brides are coming from when they say they want to enjoy their night without talking to all the guests.

Were going to have around 115 guests and our plan is to do a receiving line right after the ceremony so we can see everyone. We want to make sure that we enjoy every moment of our wedding and not stress about going around table to table

Just as others have said we chose a more intimate affair in order to spend time w our nearest and dearest and not be too overwhelmed. We still had a hard time making sure to connect w everyone and that's w a 75 count guest list....just try to enjoy but still greet all of your guests the best you can! :+)

This is why I’m really glad we have 60 guests and we will be attending cocktail hour, so hopefully by the time dancing happens I’ve socialized and can just have fun.

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They might ask you those questions, and they might not. Who's to say? But so what if they do? They're there to celebrate you and will be excited for you, so be gracious about it.

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Honestly, it's about your attitude and how you approach it. If you view it as a chore to take 1 minute out of your night to say "Hi!" to Aunt Gertha who you haven't seen in 10 years and answer a the same questions a few times graciously, you're going to find this annoying and difficult no matter what. I wasn't all that *excited* to talk to my MIL's friend who I had met once for 20 seconds, or my racist Uncle Ben who was probably going to say something inappropriate, but those people were important to people who are important to me. And so taking a few minutes out of my day to make sure I gave them a sliver of my time since they gave up their time to come wasn't exactly a hardship that ruined my night. It also meant a lot the people who wanted them there, who, presumably, you love and care about (or at least they bankrolled your wedding). I'm of the opinion that doing some small which makes another person's day better and makes them feel welcomed and special is worth it. You reap what you sow.

Practice having a quick, semi-detailed answer you can say graciously with a smile for some of the questions you think you will get. Practice changing the topic and having segue ways to move on to the next table easily when someone is taking up a lot of your time.

Ok you will be feed first so eat!!! When you are done your guests will be eating so go table to table and speak with the table. Say Hi, thank everyone for coming, thats it. Then enjoy the party. If a guest wants a convo with you they will approach you. Another option would be to have a receiving line, whereas you and your other half stand at the exit of the ceremony and speak to everyone. It will take time and more than likely extend your time at the venue. Also, take a deep breath, relax, and know that you can enjoy your day!!!

I hear you so hard! i am a social introvert, and was pretty freaked out the night before our 175 person wedding. things that worked for me: building time alone with H into the day. we didn't do an official first look, but we hung out together all afternoon with our WP doing pictures etc and it was awesome and chill and especially great because we literally hardly saw each other after the ceremony. make your visiting with guests as relaxed as possible--do table visits instead of a receiving line, or do a sweetheart table so people can come to you. ask your BMs to check in with you and make sure you are doing ok. force yourself to eat, before and during the reception. also, we scheduled some alone time right after the ceremony, just 15 mins with just the 2 of us to talk, decompress, make out, etc, which was so nice and made me feel better about everything that came after. also, since you want to spend as much time as possible on the dance floor (again, i hear you so hard), get the visits with the older portion of the guests out of the way early in the night, and count on the fact that most of the guests your own age will be partying down with you on the dance floor. you can do this--it'll be amazing.good luck!

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This is also a great point! Schedule down time if you are an introvert. We had a small plate of appetizers in a small room for us after the ceremony and had 5-10 minutes to just relax and decompress as a couple. Then, after dinner, our photographer whisked us away for some stunning night shots, which, again, was a time for just the two of us to really let it all sink in (and for me, to escape being the centre of 200 people's attention for a few minutes).

Smaller guest list will definitely help!!!

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THIS! So much this.

Do you have a wedding planner or coordinator?? I'd definitely make sure that you have set time to eat and set aside 20-30 minutes for you and your FH to step aside and have a quiet personal moment!

I'd also recommend greeting as many guests as you can before the wedding reception! Things like a welcome reception the night before and cocktail hour are ways to get some of those greetings out of the way early, and make it easier on the reception! For the reception - definitely make a plan for a receiving line or tables visits.

Check out these articles with more tips!!

5 Things You Should Make Time to Do at Your Wedding

5 Ways to Savor Every Moment on Your Wedding Day

I am so with you on this sentiment! I want to enjoy the wedding and not have it be “work”

I advise you to do table visits during dinner. Take 1-2 minutes at every table and talk to every guest that way, and then your obligation will be over, YK?

View Quoted Comment Thankfully other people in this forum understand what it's like to be an introvert and i appreciate their advice instead of calling me ungrateful.