How did you choose who would be your bridesmaids?

I wanted to avoid the same conundrum. While I don’t care about such things, I know some people do. I wanted to make sure I didn’t make any of my friends feel as though I were ranking our friendships. I have a lot of great friends, but everybody knows I am closest with my 2 BFFs (One male and one female). So, those will be the only 2 people in my bridal party- a maid of honor and a man of honor. I knew if I chose anyone beyond them, it was going to lead to friendship ranking and hurt feelings. My fiancé is going to have 3 groomsmen. I’d contemplated adding another person to keep the sides even, but I have decided to just leave them uneven. If I had added another person, I was going to choose my SIL since she is family and friends would not be hurt by that decision. However, I was afraid that would lead to hurt feelings amongst family members (I have A LOT of cousins) so I just nixed that idea & stuck with my 2 BFFs.

I chose 2 friends I've been close with since I was about 15, 1 who I've been close with since I met her at 18, and my SIL, who I have also been close with since high school. I was 29 when I got married. I chose women who have been close to me for a significant portion of my life and who I talk with frequently (at least via text since 2 of them live out of state). Picking my bridal party was very easy for me, as I have other friends, but these women have been people who have been like family to me (and 1 who I'm very happy is now family).

I chose my best friend and both of my sisters-in-law

View Quoted Comment That was very considerate of you.

View Quoted Comment Okay. That makes sense. Did you suspect that anu of your other friends or family had hurt feelings?

View Quoted Comment Okay thanks for sharing. Did you ever suspect that sny of your other friends' feelings were hurt?

When choosing my MOH, I chose a girl who I saw/talked to on a daily basis. We had grew close during the past 2 years of knowing her so I thought it was only right to choose her not to mention my best friend was getting married as well. During a conversation of how long we know each other i can tell my best friend was upset because of a comment she made, but i figured it was one less thing for her to worry about and i didn't want to lose focus on hers as i was standing up in her wedding.

I’ve always envisioned my bridesmaids to be my best friends and those closest to me. I honestly couldn’t imagine anyone else other than the girls I chose

Daughter chose very close friends, three going back to preschool and the other two were from the beginning of HS, so she knew them 10-22+ years at the time of the wedding. All of them were people she's been close with over long periods of time, even though they've now lived all over the country since they started college. Also, FWIW, she didn't have any expectations of them other than showing up for the wedding, since 4 of the 5 had significant travel/work & family obligations. As it turned out, all but one of them was able to attend something -- the shower or small low-key bachelorette -- in addition to being in town for at least 4 days around the wedding. Daughter was thrilled and there was never any drama, probably because there weren't any expectations.

I have a good friend who was a BM or MOH in at least a dozen weddings over the years, and has several sisters & SILs. She was a little older when she got married and decided not to try and choose among people, so, sort of like a Royal wedding, she had all her & her husband's young nieces as FGs -- there may well have been about a dozen of them -- but clearly all they did was wear a sweet dress and walk down the aisle. I've also had friends who had no attendants at all.

Good luck figuring things out!

When choosing bridesmaids, I chose the girls that have always been there for me. I am on the other side of your story. I was a BM in my childhood(18 years of friendship) friend’s wedding, but I did not ask her to be my BM. The reason is I just don’t feel so close to her anymore. We were bff in middle and high school. I believe the reason she chose me as one of her seven BMs because she chose the important girls in each stage of her life, but not because we are still close.

View Quoted Comment Okay, i can understand the logic behind your reasoning.

View Quoted Comment Okay I conpletely understand your reasoning.

View Quoted Comment Thanks. I'm going to go the Meghan Markle route. I cannot rank my friends.

I picked those closest to me to be my bridesmaids. Mine said consisted mostly of family whereas my husband's side was mostly friends.

View Quoted Comment Okay thanks

View Quoted Comment Okay thank you for sharing. It is each person's choice but I'm leaning towards having no bridal party.

I only have one sister so I chose her to be my maid of honor and I chose my FH's sister to be my bridesmaid. I kept it super small and didn't choose any friends, but rather will have them as guests at my wedding.

View Quoted Comment Closest to you wit

View Quoted Comment Closest to you within the last year? Or cloest to you in a time sum of all your life?

View Quoted Comment I really like this idea! No ranking. Thanks for sharing.