My officiant is a family friend who I attended school with and he agreed to do our wedding - my issue is that I don't want to offend him by giving him too little. He said, "Just give me what you want." I live in CA if that helps. Thanks.
OH IDK, if my pastor doesnt TELL Me how much, I plan on donating money to our CHURCH and then giving him a montary gift as well, for him! But for HIM, i was going to do like $50 or $75 only cause i am inviting him to dinner as well...so there is food....so its a gift for HIM, for Church and IDK! but since its a friend..maybe 100???
The minister we are looking at using charges $175. (I am in Florida)
We still have to shop around a little bit, but $175 isn't too bad. We are having our ceremony on the beach and she provides a PA system if needed and she also provides the little table with tablecloth for the sand unity stuff.
Thank you all for your input. My friend is not a minister and our wedding will be held at a theater, not a church, so we've decided that $100 would be our offering. Also, he was going to be invited anyway.
We're having a Catholic legal ceremony in DC before the wedding---we've had 1 marriage prep class already but I totally forgot to ask---and he hasn't mentioned charging us. But my uncle is going to officiate in PR when we go a few days later for the "big" wedding.
Should I give $100 to each of them? Good question Tara!
We had to give our church a deposit of $100, and we will pay them small fees for candles, aisle runner, videographer, sound person etc. 35-50 each. Small potatoes. We will invite our pastor and his wife to the rehearsal dinner and reception. We will give him a thank you card with $100 in it. The church's wedding book says the gift to the officiant is totally up to us.
@reina j. he also did our counseling and rehearsal my fh also went to the church since he was a kid so no he didnt charge us that price we gave it to him because he did an excellent job and we would of gave him more if we could of my thoughts on it was we paid alot for everything else hes the one making it come together so yes it was worth it
A kindly written card definitely would be good. I've had friends pay in various way (travel costs, gifts of jewelry). It sounds like $100 is plenty since he's a family friend. However, if your wedding is going to be quite elaborate or if you're hoping to have a lot of meeting and work from his end to put together the ceremony, consider upping it a little.
If your wedding is in Virginia, be aware that Virginia does not accept online ordination. Couples' try this for a friend all the time, but it won't work. If your officiant is not authorized, you can contact HLAM Ministries right away to get one of their churches to take care of the paperwork. That's what we did, and gave our friend $200. If you don't get your friend authorized, you will be paying over $500 for an authorized minister to come to the ceremony and rehearsal, since Virginia no longer has Justices' of the Peace.