April 2018

Having guys standing up for the groom And for the bride?

GoodMOB, on October 22, 2017 at 10:18 PM Posted in Planning 0 12

I just haven't been to any weddings where this has been done. How would it be if the bride had a sister and 2 brothers standing up for her, and the groom has 3 guys also? Would that be weird? How do you do it? Or is it better to just keep females on the bride's side? And how would you handle any older relatives who might be aghast at changing things from the traditional?


Latest activity by Brenda, on October 23, 2017 at 8:11 AM
  • muriel
    Champion June 2018
    muriel ·
    • Flag

    Let the aghast older relatives handle themselves

    It's not uncommon to have bridesmen and groomswomen. Often they wear the same color as the rest of the bridal party or groom's party, whichever is relevant. If the BM's are wearing grey dresses, the bridesman could wear a grey suit. If the groomsmen are wearing a navy suit, the groomswomen would wear a navy dress. Obviously, that only works for certain colors.

    • Reply
  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
    • Flag

    I see this all the in at least a wedding a month! I haven't personally experienced any aghast older relatives either, lol!

    The people standing with you should be the closest people to you to support you. Otherwise, what's the point?

    Do it!

    • Reply
  • Rosered
    Devoted January 2019
    Rosered ·
    • Flag

    It is becoming more and more common. My cousin had her brother as a "bridesman" and no one cared (not even the grandparents and great aunts). Actually, my grandmother said that it made so much more sense that way.

    • Reply
  • pammat
    VIP October 2017
    pammat ·
    • Flag

    I had 2 bridesmen, DH had 2 groomsmen. No women in the wedding party at all. (Besides me, I mean!)

    No one complained, at least not to us. If they had, they would have gotten a thank you for your concern...and then completely ignored.

    • Reply
  • KRaeBride
    Dedicated July 2018
    KRaeBride ·
    • Flag

    I am doing something similar for my own wedding. I'm having my brother and 5 ladies stand up with me and FH has only men standing with him. I chose to have my brother stand on my side because he is my brother and I can't imagine not having him stand with me. FH has 2 brothers who he chose not to stand with him so it seemed silly for my brother to stand on his side. And for any of my more "traditional" guests I will tell them that I love my brother and I want him to be on my side.

    I say, it is your wedding. If your guests are caught up on this tiny detail then it is their problem.

    You do what feels right for you!

    • Reply
  • danilaughs
    Expert August 2018
    danilaughs ·
    • Flag

    I'm having 3 men on my side (out of 5 total BP) and FH is having all guys. It's no big deal!

    • Reply
  • Del
    Master November 2017
    Del ·
    • Flag

    It's totally fine. And they're your SIBLINGS; there's nothing to get all aghast at. I can't imagine even the most stereotypical great auntie screaming "OMG - she has BROTHERS? Burn the harlot!"

    • Reply
  • Calio
    Dedicated March 2019
    Calio ·
    • Flag

    I have been wondering about this also. I really want my male cousin and my brother up there with me. I think it should be fine.

    • Reply
  • An Actual Human
    Devoted November 2018
    An Actual Human ·
    • Flag

    Last wedding I went to, there were no female attendants. Groom's two best friends, bride's two brothers. The bridesmen wore the matching vest to the suit while the groomsmen wore blue vests to match the groom's blue suit.

    I'm very much against forcing people to stand on the side of your soon-to-be-spouse just because they share the same genitalia. FH's sister can stand on his side; my male bestie can stand on mine.

    • Reply
  • Orchids
    Master March 2018
    Orchids ·
    • Flag

    My FH has a groomswoman. No big deal.

    • Reply
  • Aly
    Expert June 2018
    Aly ·
    • Flag

    Not weird at all. Anything goes! It's your wedding- it's what you want it to be. Personally I will be having my brother and sister stand for me, and my FH will have his brother and sister stand for him. And I didn't give it one second of thought what anyone else thinks about it!

    • Reply
  • Brenda
    Devoted May 2018
    Brenda ·
    • Flag

    I'm having a bridesman and I don't care what anyone has to say about it.

    It's your day, you should have the people you want standing with you.

    • Reply

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