guilt for having a wedding?

Do what you want, it's your day! This will be my second marriage and we're doing the whole shebang because I didn't really get that the first time around. His family had been talking a lot about us just going to the courthouse, especially when I lost my job but that was after we'd booked the venue, dj and officiant so we're just gonna keep on trucking. I'd already planned for a lot of diy projects for the wedding that were going to save us money to allocate elsewhere and according to the math we've done so far, we aren't outside of our new budget.

Some have made statements but if they aren't contributing, I couldn't care less.

My parents have things to me and our daughter about the wedding. My mom saw pics of the venue....."it looks too $$$, are you sure you want to spend the money...." my dad to my daughter...."so much money for one day is silly." If Savannah came and today and said we are eloping I would be happy as we are now planning for her venue. It doesn't matter where or how you get married. You are getting married and that is the best part!! But, it is annoying when you just want people to be excited.

My mom has made comments about how much weddings cost and how weddings these days are so crazy. Like yes I want a wedding and I've been putting in a ton of research finding the best vendors for reasonable prices! So it'll be a damn good wedding and my FH and I are doing what we can afford.

Thanks everyone!

My FH and I had a really rough year financially but are slowly getting on our feet again (hence 2019wedding) I've heard some comments from friends and I'm sure there will be plenty with thoughts or something to say but we're both 2nd timers and we both strongly want a small wedding that all our family and few friends can come to as our firsts didn't involve many of them.

My mom is always about the money and always tells me to just go to the courthouse. She makes it seem like she's the one paying for it but she's already made it clear she's not helping. It's so annoying.

My Future Father-In-Law keeps giving us crap for our wedding falling on the first weekend of Deer Hunting in MN..... There are like 7 people invited that would consider going if there wasn't the wedding. Plus there are 3 more weekends to go. So I definitely get the griping about OUR wedding. My FH and I are about ready to tell him off.

But we have let it roll off so far because that's what we want. Don't forget that other people's opinions don't matter, it's your day.

Yep. Some are shocked at the expense ("so much money to spend for one day", blah blah blah); some just think we're too young to get married (we are 23 and 26).

No one should ever make you feel guilty for wanting to have a wedding the way YOU want to have one. As others have said, " Darned if you do, darned if you don't." Do what makes YOU happy

They are all shocked at the expense but most of them think more people should be invited. I'm not downplaying my wedding to have more people I dont want there. I want a small wedding and i want it to be nice. @erika, right?

Ignore them. Have your wedding and do what you want. Worrying about them is only feeding into their negativity.

View Quoted Comment Nonna what you said makes so much sense. My fiance and I have been engaged for 5 years now. We work in film so its feast or famine. I am the only girl in my family but I'm also not looking to spend a lot of my parents money on this. We are going on a business trip to Las Vegas and thought how fun and cheap would it be to get married by Elvis. It was only a month prior so we made sure to let everyone we invited know that we understand if you cant make it since its such short notice but please come celebrate if you are able. I am now getting what I didn't want and thats guilt trips, only from my family, because they cant go. It's hard for us to plan when we have to jump at whatever job comes our way. Reading what you said is just how I feel about it but still I am left feeling like I've wronged everyone. I was happy and excited but can't help feeling sad.

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I am going to add this into my mantra. I was so excited until I told my family about it. Then all hell broke loose.