Guest entertainment... before the ceremony?

I wouldn't cater to your late family. Not 45 minutes. Maybe 10-15.

If it’s reallt stressing you, can you do a bar or even a like lemonade and punch bar? Or a ‘write some well wishes for the soon to be happy couple’ box

Honestly though adults are pretty good at entertaining them selfs for a half hour. Particularly in the age of smart phones. Display your wedding # and ask people to tag themselves on Instagram or whatever. They’ll be fine.

Unless you’re hosting that 45 minutes with drinks and light snacks, you shouldn’t be adding that buffer. I get to weddings 20-30 minutes early. That means I’d be waiting for your wedding to start for over an hour. I would be extremely unhappy by the time you got started if that happened.

I suggest a wedding bar, hot chocolate, popcorn, donuts, etc. that way they can at least snack a little. Or maybe even a game? I’m having cornhole outside for the kids. I do agree 45 minutes is too long! I think a max of 30 mins, that’s half an hour! Surely your family can try to be on time for this very special event, just make punctuality very important.

If I’m reading this correctly, did you put a start time on your invitation but you’re planning to start the ceremony 45 minutes after the time on the invitation?

Please dont do this. My husband and I went to a wedding in August. We showed up 30 minutes early and the bride and groom started 45 minutes after the time on the invitation. They had a wine bar so that was something but the weather was not ideal to be sitting outside for 1 hour and 15 minutes waiting for the ceremony to start. Unless you are planning on fully hosting this 45 minutes with a snack (app) and a drink, don’t.

So you're going to punish the guests who come on time and enable to the ones who show up late? I personally think that's rude. I arrive to weddings at least 15 minutes early so if it started 45 minutes after it was said to start..I'd be annoyed. If adults can't show up on time to a wedding, that's their choice.

My husband's family is chronically late. I told him to tell then they must be on time as the doors to the ceremony space would be closed once the ceremony started. They were on time. That being said, we did have drinks and dinner foods when people arrived.

We put invites saying guests are welcome at 5pm, ceremony 530 for certain reasons as well (my fh is brazilian and its cultural to be late ). the website also says that the ceremony will start at 530.

we will be having lemonade, sangria and water for guests before the ceremony starts and out dj will be playing light music at 5pm.

*Hors d'oeuvres, not dinner foods

Our violinist was playing during the time people were arriving. But I agree with most pp’s, don’t have your guests wait 45 minutes. Our invitations said 2pm, but our website said “ceremony begins at 2pm, we will meet under the chuppah at 215.” Perhaps indicting the buffer would be better, especially for people who are on time, but just not starting for 45 minutes is rude, in my opinion.

Totally agree with PPs. I’d be so frustrated as a guest if I had to sit there for an hour (I always get to ceremony’s 15 minutes early. Some people end up getting there 30 minutes early because they have a buffer for traffic or if they didn’t know exactly where it was. I typically just find my seat and sit there until it starts. Tell all of your notoriously late people that it starts when it starts. Do not make your guests wait.

I think having a 10-15 minute buffer would be the absolute best option. 45 minutes is super excessive. If you change your time to 15 minutes, then you don't need to provide anything to entertain the guests. However, if you keep your 45 minute buffer, I'd say you should provide drinks and an appetizer for this time.

I agree with pps it's not fair to your guest who show up on time to make them wait for the ceremony to start. I would start your ceremony on time, and if adults can't be on time than that is on them not you. If you will not change your mind on this then definitely have drinks and apps available.

45 mins is way too long a buffer--you'll end up with a lot of cranky people. it's nice to have some drinks or snacks available for folks before the ceremony, if you're going to stick with this wait time, but i would try to close that gap if you can.

Yikes, I was not anticipating such backlash on this post! Oops.

Perhaps I should clarify.... our invitations indicate that the ceremony begins promptly at 4:30 pm, but it also states that the venue will open for guest arrival beginning at 3:45 pm. So guests are fully aware that the ceremony will not take place until 4:30.

Yes, the main reason for us allowing a 45 minute arrival window is due to family who are always late (and unfortunately the importance of our wedding would not change their late behavior), but because our wedding is on a Friday in Los Angeles, we also wanted the extra time for guests to arrive because everyone will end up hitting traffic, some worse than others. I know some people will overestimate the traffic and end up arriving right at 3:45 while others will underestimate the traffic and end up arriving just in the knick of time. That’s just the way it is when dealing with LA freeways.

Anyway, hopefully now you all can better understand the 45 minute allotment for guest arrival...

View Quoted Comment It still doesn't make it okay to make the guests that get there on time to wait. I say list your correct start time, and maybe wait 10-15 minutes to start, but no more than that.

If you're worried about traffic maybe put something about that on your wedding website.

Guests will most likely be busy talking with each other. It's a great time to catch up with friends and relatives. You don't need anything to entertain them.

That doesn’t change my opinion. If your invite states doors open at 3:45 for guest arrival but you aren’t beginning the ceremony until 4:30, have them greeted with beverages and snacks.

View Quoted Comment Okay so technically you do not have a buffer as you have listed your correct ceremony start time at 4:30 on the invite and plan to start at that time? You're just wondering what to do for the folks that choose to decide to arrive early (3:45). I understand now lol. I would say some light music would be perfectly acceptable. It is the guests choice is they choose to arrive so early although the invite clearly states the ceremony starts at 4:30 pm. I'm sure they will find a way to entertain themselves. You may want to offer bottled water or maybe a wine option, but I don't think that's required.

View Quoted Comment

I totally get having family that's chronically late! I've been telling my mother things start 30 minutes earlier then they do sense I was 11.

That's not going to change because its a special day. My mother was late to my graduation. Its just how some people are programmed.

And you're not even having a 45 min delay, you're having a 45min arrival window. Its actually kind of polite in my thinking, I'm chronically early for things (see above mother! I blame her), and I would be thrilled to be able to go inside and not wait in my car for the venue to open! If there where refreshments all the better, but I wouldn't be bored or upset if there wasn't anything. If you have 4:30 listed, and that's when you start, people will plan accordingly.