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Rachel
Beginner October 2021

Groomsmen are ruining my wedding

Rachel, on September 14, 2021 at 11:42 PM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 47

The groomsmen have complained about literally every detail (the invitations not being sent sooner, the way the tux looked, not having a rehearsal dinner because they wanted a free dinner, the menu for our wedding night, the lists goes on). Last weekend they had their bachelor party and I BEGGED my...
The groomsmen have complained about literally every detail (the invitations not being sent sooner, the way the tux looked, not having a rehearsal dinner because they wanted a free dinner, the menu for our wedding night, the lists goes on). Last weekend they had their bachelor party and I BEGGED my fiancé not to go. He agreed. They ended up going to one anyway after pressuring my fiancé. My fiancé told me and they were pissed at him for telling me. Caused a whole huge fight. Now we’re asking them to spend an extra $27 on their ties because the ones that came with their suits are the completely wrong color. They’re refusing to pay and saying it’s our fault for getting the wrong ties but the formal store didn’t offer the correct ones. I just do not know what to do. My wedding is in a month and these groomsmen have made me hate each and everyone of them with their horrible behavior. Keep in mind that this is the very short version. I guess I’m just looking for opinions on what to do and if I’m overreacting. My bridesmaids have been nothing but angels. I just don’t understand why men who are almost 30 are acting this way. They spent hundreds or thousands at the strip club but can’t cough up and extra $25. Especially when we’ve spent so much on them already, money that we do not have because we’re literally broke and have an infant..

47 Comments

  • T
    Expert May 2010
    Theresa ·
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    "They were mad that we aren’t having a rehearsal dinner (we’re not having a rehearsal, just a run through the day of, they specifically said they wanted the free meal and deserved it)."

    No rehearsal, no rehearsal dinner! And they're getting a free meal. At the reception.

  • Jacks
    Master September 2019
    Jacks ·
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    It is really interesting, and not at all uncommon.

  • E
    Super July 2023
    Eniale ·
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    This, exactly.

  • Alyssa
    Super December 2021
    Alyssa ·
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    I agree. They're already being childish. Don't add anything more to their plate. Go to Macy's and buy a bunch of ties you like, you will likely be able to find something you like a lot cheaper than $30 per tie, and most department stores you can use coupons and often have "wedding discounts".

    Also hubby needs to man up, and tell them to man up or they're out. They are supposed to be his support system, not your liability.

  • Rachel
    Beginner October 2021
    Rachel ·
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    Sorry? I don’t really understand why people are so mad at me. I was looking for advice from other brides and I got it. Yeah I was happy that someone was actually not rude to me lol. But I didn’t latch on to that. I listened to other people who didn’t agree with me. I’m just not sure why everyone’s focusing on that one aspect of this whole chat.
  • Rachel
    Beginner October 2021
    Rachel ·
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    Yeah I’m definitely going to buy the ties! Just not sure what to do about everything else!
  • Alyssa
    Super December 2021
    Alyssa ·
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    They’re (supposed to be) grown men. They can shape up or ship out.
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