FH has a 9 year old daughter and me and her are awesome together and she likes being around me. We are planning 2022 and she will be 10 almost 11 at the time of the wedding. I know she is too old to be a flower girl (or that would have been my thought when I was her age) but too young for a bridesmaid. I want her to be able to stand up with us if she's comfortable but I am totally cool with her changing her mind on the day of if she does.
Question is how can I include her? Junior bridesmaid or maybe just honor attendant or something cute? I'm also conflicted about how she will feel during the ceremony. What were some ideas all you other brides have had? One idea I am okay with is to have little one go dress shopping with me and FH together and let her pick out a dress in a color different from the bridesmaids to let her feel special. Other than that I'm just blank and normally I'm not.
Aw that’s such a great age and I love that you want to include her! I think a jr bridesmaid is perfect. I would definitely go shopping together and pick out a dress/shoes. Also maybe get your nails done together before the big day. Reassure her often that you’re excited she’s going to stand with you guys! Maybe even occasionally asking for her input on decor and such. I may even do something cute at the reception like have a surprise special cake for her next to the wedding cake. Idk it just sounds like a cute age and you guys sound like you have got a good thing going. Good luck!
I definitely agree with making her a junior bridesmaid, having her go dress shopping with you and also with having her in a different color dress than the others. This way she can feel fully involved and apart of the whole wedding process. I am so happy to hear how much you care, want to incorporate her into your wedding day and considering her feelings as well. I can only imagine how much it touches that special place in your FH's heart!
My FH and I are doing the same with my son, from a previous marriage, as we decided to even include him during the unity part of our ceremony. He is a junior groomsman, he will be walking down the aisle to the stage with my FH and the one to hand off our wedding bands. I even asked him if he wanted to be apart of the mother/son dance but he didn't feel comfortable to dance in front of people, he said "Mommy I would rather sit and hold your hand while Shawn and his Mom dance". We are trying to incorporate him in every aspect, because it's like I told my FH that it isn't just about him and I coming together this day is about all of us coming together as a family unit.
We were able to find a cake topper that incorporated my son as well. (sample picture below)
Our four kids are all older (teens and 20s; 2 are mine 2 are his) but they are our only wedding attendants (my Bffs are the "Advisory Commitee"). We will be doing a Sand Ceremony at the ceremony with all 6 of us pouring in differnat colored sand. I also consulted with them on colors and the "looks" and all the fun things. My eldest is an artist and she designed our STD and will do the invites. I would say, ask if she wants to help with something or go shopping or whatever and let her lead you.