FMIL ask for Professional family photo's without Bride/Groom???

You have every right to feel weird. The photos are suppose to include the bride and groom in majority of the photos. Not combinations that do not include either of you

Lolll, FMILs. Mine was outraged that the photographer didn't get any photos of DH's step-father's sister. You can't make this stuff up.

Anyway, if you have time to spare for family photos, I'd just let her do it, but if you're crunched for time before the ceremony starts or if you're doing these during your cocktail hour, I'd tell her you have time constraints and can't do that many combos.

Is she paying for them? If not, then I wouldn't do it. That's ridiculous to expect your WEDDING photos to not include you and/or your DF.

Agreed. You don't necessarily need to confront her about it... you can say something like "thanks for these great ideas! We likely won't have time to do all of these combinations but we'll keep them in mind" or something along those lines.

You aren't paying for her family portraits. You are paying for your wedding portraits.

She is completely out of place.

Oh hell no! You're not using my multi-thousands of dollar photographer as your personal family photo session. Sorry, not sorry!

Sounds like she is using your wedding to get all the family photos she (and other family members)want and never took the time (or money) to pay for. I would tell her your timeline will not allow all of those pictures.

Hi Catherine. The only requests I take are from the Bride and Groom for this very reason. This is a wedding day and those images are of you and your Groom and who you want. I realize you already sent out requests. Talk to your photographer and give him/her your must have's. If that list does not include anyone else's list of requirements, they are free to hire that photographer on his/her own time and own dime.

She might want other family photos (like her parents, your grandparents, with their kids, or her and her siblings). If there is time to do this, i would let her do a limited number. Honestly how often do you get the family together? But maybe 10 -20 minutes of this, not a whole session.

We did all formals and immediate family/wedding party prior to the ceremony. We did grandparents after and a cousin photo on all 4 sides of our families. It was great because we rarely get all the cousins together. The DJ just announced "all cousins to the dance floor", pics were taken in 10 minutes. My grandma was so proud and happy to have a pic of all her grand kids (30 of us plus spouses!)

Ummm yeah, this could get awkward. Thank her for her input, then later I'd warn her that there may not be time for all of her requests. Give your photog a heads up in case your FMIL goes rogue on your wedding day. All those extra shots could really muck up your timeline!

@ Jessi, absolutely give your photographer a heads up. You are so right!!! I don't mind being the bad guy when the Bride and Groom's requests get railroaded by another family member and letting that person know we have a prioritized list that needs to be done first. Communication is key. If there's time - great; get it done. But if not, my couple comes first regardless of much stomping around is done!

I'm always surprised by how often this question comes up.

I would kindly just tell her that there is not enough time in the timeline for non-wedding related photos, and that you want to make sure you return to your guests promptly to return to hosting.

Okay good! I thought this was weird. I told my sister, my matron of honor, and she laughed and said 'Don't even bring this up to FMIL and just tell the photographer these combinations can happen during the reception if they can get them, otherwise don't stress about it.' I do like the idea if I do say anything to my FMIL to say something along the lines of thanking her and we can see how many we can get done during our short time frame. I think I'm just in shock of the request to begin with.. I mean what are hubby and I suppose to do - step aside for like 5 minutes and watch our photographer take photos without us? Awkward.

Ya that is really weird, and kind of rude imo. I agree with your sister that you shouldn't say anything to her and just tell the photographer the ones you are okay with, and if she questions it at the time of the wedding (which would again be crazy rude) explain that you have a short time period and needed to prioritize. Omg... this actually makes me mad for you. I have a bad temper so if my FMIL did this I would probably lose it.

Be prepared for her to question it. Someone who would ask for this in advance won't stop at complaining at the wedding. "Sorry, MIL-- we are short on time and just couldn't fit them in. Feel free to have someone snap some pictures with a cellphone while we're busy..."

Unless your and FH's parents are paying for the wedding, I don't understand why you asked them to give you a list in the first place. Don't you and your fiancé know who needs to be in family portraits?

I suggest you tell her you are sorry your request was unclear as the photos are supposed to be with the bride and/or groom, so you'll just add the ones that include you guys to the list

I wouldn't do the ones that don't have either of you. But i think ones of just the groom with his family/parents/siblings etc and then the same for the bride is pretty standard.

Hell no. If they want to book the photographer for another date, fine. the end.

Is it just me or does this happen a lot? I used to work in photo labs and heard this request often.

You don't have to do this, sounds like they just want to use your photographer to get a family portrait taken. You only have so much time on your wedding day to get things done for your wedding. I doubt the photographer really wants to do this anyhow - they can set up their own time for a family portrait.

We ended up having 20 minutes extra before my sister's wedding where she wasn't available (bustle fastening emergency repair) and the groom suggested using the time for family portraits. They were impromptu and fun, and everyone loved them including the happy couple! If it had been demanded by a family member or crowded out more important bridal shots then yeah, inappropriate. But if your family are laid back and you have the time, and are never all together, they can be a great way to give back to folks who spent a lot of time, money and effort to be there and support you.

We're thinking of having a yichud break after our ceremony and before our photos, during which time I would totally be up for our photog doing family photos!