Feeling Hurt

Thank you ladies for all your support. I know to some it might seem a little petty but honestly I was just pretty shocked and hurt. I appreciate the kind words and advice. I'm sure it'll be fun.

She probably feels really bad and is sad to be missing out on your party but things come. I'm sure it wasn't an easy decision for her to make. If it is really that important for her to be there then have your party a different day. You can't fault her for choosing to go to a wedding that she wants to go to even if it ruined your perfect plan for the day. Weddings trump bachelorette parties in my opinion. Sometimes it looks like things are going to work out perfectly and then they don't and it sucks and you just have to move on and come up with a plan b.

@Princess Consulea - I only did for her wedding what she asked of me. So for example if she said "Crap I still haven't found a florist. Can you do that for me?" I would shop around, get prices, and present them to her for the final say and contact.

In my book, weddings always take precedent over showers and bachelor(ette) parties. If someone would go to a wedding in the case when there wasn't a shower or b-party, then they should go even if it does conflict with a shower or b-party.

Sounds like you want her husband to go to his good friend's wedding stag. Maybe it would help you to think about it like she's putting her husband first instead of you thinking "she is picking an acquaintance over me."

I do understand you being disappointed that your sister won't be at your bachelorette party, I would be too. But how would you feel if your sister's husband missed your wedding to go to a bachelor party?

I would be hurt too, but I kind of agree with @Frugal_gator. I think this is an unfortunate side effect of planning things too early

Is there any way she can meet you after the wedding? Will you gals still be out and about?

Well then you did WAY more than should have been expected of you girl!

It's a tough situation. A lot of the PP say it's petty that you feel that way, but I definitely feel you have a right to feel hurt in this situation. I wouldn't hold it against her or make this a big deal, though. Since you decided to plan your own bachelorette party, be prepared for some disappointments and backlash. With that being said, just enjoy the planning, and the people that want to come will come. And try to forgive your sister, she was also conflicted on whether to attend a wedding with her husband or a b-party.

@frugal_gator - Again this is a friend of his not a family member. Honestly if it was his brother bachelor party I would be fine with it.

@Kristy - I tried to offer several compromises. I even said even if she met us at our last stop at 10 Id be okay. I'm guessing that would mean shed be at almost the entire wedding. However he reasoning was that her hubby booked a room and if she has the chance to stay in a hotel she will.

I knew I should have ended with my strongest point...

"Her husband is good friends with the groom."

Sounds like you want her husband to go to his good friend's wedding stag. He's obviously not going to your bachelorette party and will go to the wedding. Your sister is going to the wedding because she's putting her husband first, as she should, instead of "picking an acquaintance over [you]."

OMG I totally understand why you are upset. Ultimately, she is your sister. If you guys have a good relationship (which I'm guessing you do since you are each other MOHs) you should be before anyone. Even if it's "just" a Bach. party, it's YOUR bach party. She is your sister before anything else. At the end of the day, your sister will decide where to attend, but don't feel like you shouldn't be upset. If that's how you feel, feel that! Even if a bunch of girls are telling you that you shouldn't be upset, you do you. Hell I know I would be pissed if my sister did that. At the end of the day, a sister is very different than the rest of the ppl in you BP cause that's your blood. Good luck! I hope you guys can find a solution to this

Either way, have fun!!! I'm sure your sister didn't intend for all this to happen.

@Mrs.Magallan2016, NO! It is not sisters above anyone else. Once you get married, your spouse is your most important family (and her sister is married).

UGH sounds like she isn't willing to compromise at all. Sorry, girl!

@frugal_gator you have every right to have your opinion as do I

Sorry girl! I would be hurt too...my Sister wouldn't put anything above my bachelorette party but I think that's because she has been waiting forever for me to be getting married! lol There isn't much you can do about it. I would probably tell her that you are disappointed she can't celebrate the bachelorette party with you, but that you understand it is a friend's wedding day. You are definitely entitled to your feelings and there is nothing wrong with being hurt. However, you are still going to have a great time with the rest of your guests...enjoy!!!

FFS, its a freaking BACH party! They are unnecessary and personally I don't even get the point.

A wedding has complete precedence over a stupid bach party, sister or not. She should be with her husband.

I would be really pissed and hurt too, especially of this is not a good friend of hers. That sucks! It's never fun to learn there hard way that what goes around doesn't always come around.

I do think a wedding takes more importance then a Bach party. I understand your disappointed but just do something separately with your sister another time

@Mrs.Magallan2016, if you don't put your marriage before any other relationship, good luck to you.

@OP, it's possible she plans on getting drunk at the wedding and won't be able to drive to your last stop. Maybe she wants some good hotel sex with her husband. There are plenty of valid reasons why she's not going. In the end, this is only the bachelorette party and you could also have another girls' night with your sisters. I'm getting less and less sympathetic of you the more you refuse to try to understand your sister's side of this disagreement.

@Mrs.Magallan2016 I hope your FH is aware of your policy in that regard.