Feeling a little bummed about the bachlorette party...

I had to drop out of a bachelorette party trip because of costs and work. The MOH planned two weekend bachelorette trips. One to Vegas for 4 days ($2500/person cost) the second was an overnight concert trip to St. Louis ($400). I was struggling to come up with money for the trips as it is and was debating dropping out when my time off requests were denied and I ended up having to drop out anyway. As much as I still adore my friend who was getting married and would have loved to be at her bachelorette, I have to say I was kind of relieved to not spend $4k to do it.

If you really want to go, it wouldn't stop me, alone or not. They do say don't plan your own, maybe ask them if something near by would work better & ask you MOH if she is wanting to do it. I really want a Bach. Party however I am pretty sure it's not in the works, so it's whatever. I am still inviting a few people to go out after my bridal shower (that my baby sister are throwing) but it's just to dance & have fun, but nothing official, since we don't go out much! I know you really want it, but it's probably not best to do it yourself, unless you just want to have yourself a getaway weekend in New orleans?

I specifically asked not to go anywhere outside of driving distance. My MOH was like "would you want to do something like Vegas?" to which I responded "OMG, thanks, but WAY too much effort and money. Just want to hang out with you guys." She's hinted that it might be a weekend of sorts, but just renting a house down the shore or in the Poconos (and it would be off-season), which would be PERFECT for me.

Remember that the bachelorette should be about spending time with your BMs/other friends! They're special to you because you can have fun no matter where you are. Plus, I'd hate for them to spend a ton of extra money.

I think it would be great if your bridal party planned a celebration night that included an overnight and breakfast. These multi-day trips get expensive quickly, despite all the discounts and cut corners. Just yesterday, I drove an hour and a half to attend an annual luncheon with my female cousins. I had a blast, but at the end of the day, that four hour event cost me over $100 in gas, tolls, bar tab, and lunch/tip. Granted, it was a pricey restaurant, but when you're going to celebrate, you usually do something more upscale.

Of course you can do what you want -- there is no law against planning your own bachelorette party. However, once you do, you have to assume responsibility for the event you're planning. In essence, you are now in charge. That gives the bridal party to right to decline to attend a party you're planning -- for whatever reason.

Speak to your MOH and tell her that you're perfectly fine with something closer to home and far shorter than four days. You might be surprised by her reaction.

Brides should never plan their own bach party. My MOH and BM are both planning it. I know where we are going and the general idea, but they are planning the rest to be a surprise. As far as I know, there will be no bridal shower and I'm not about to plan my own or ask someone to do it either.

I think you should still go and live it up! It might not be exactly like you hoped it would be, but you are a strong woman who should still enjoy life - with or without flakey friends.

I don't understand at all why planning your own bachelorette party is in poor taste. That's like saying you can't plan your own birthday party.

And Anne, I'm really sorry about what's happening. I'd say if you're left with even one girl who wants to go, do it! It's New Orleans. You'll have an awesome time no matter what.

Almost this exact thing happened to me. My friend was planning and organizing, and then she just... stopped. Ok! I ended up having a very tame night out with a few friends while hubby and his guys went to NOLA.

@ Rebecca You're not supposed to plan your own birthday party. Parties in honor of YOU should be planned by others. That was my understanding.

If I didn't plan my own birthday parties I'd probably never have one.

Get over it. Girls spend more money to be in weddings than guys do, and a guy's motivation is to see a bunch of boobies. A trip on top of what the girls have probably already invested is most likely too much. As far as you doing a road trip with them to save cost... there's still time and gas involved along with the hotel and food, etc.

Slow your roll. Back up. You aren't supposed to plan this out yourself anyway.

For what it's worth, I planned my own bachelorette in New Orleans for this mardi gras, so I know how you feel. And mardi gras in New Orleans is AMAZING! Why don't you see if one friend can go with you on the weekend you planned, and then have a girls night out at home some time when everyone else can attend?

I really don't think planning your party is a big deal. Maybe pick a less expensive city.

HEre's my thing- i feel that i shouldnt be planning m own bachelorette party! I have my MOH and 3 BMs in diffrent states. My MOH is AWOL so my sister texted her and asked whats going on with it. My MOH got very irritated and just went AWOL. I told my sis, first off i have nothing to do with planning but i would think since we are all spread out, it would be better 2 days before the wedding for everyone to get together and go out when they are in my state where the wedding is. Plus, i dont want ppl to spend $ or too much time off when they are already graciously spending $ and time to go to our wedding. I'd rather have them get here than stress over a party that i would be ok having f we were all in the same state, since thats not the case, its ok not to have one!

In your case, go alone and enjoy your trip! I amsorry that they bailed, but the cost may be too much girl. Maybe you guys could plan a girls in state trip closer to the wedding

SO my fiance leaves tomorrow... I'm happy for him but can't help feeling the jealousy D: So I kind of had a break down in tears since I felt alone through this whole process.

But some GOOD news! My MOH that originally planned this is back on track! I talked to her explaining how I felt and she is back on board helping me plan this thing. So I got one person going! Yay! Not much of a party, but what the heck, at least I got my MOH to tag along. Oh, and one other friend might go too, so maybe three of us

My MOH was so sweet, she bought me a tiara and everything, which I did not expect but we're doing this during Mardi Gras after all!

One of my BMs felt bad she couldn't make it and is planning a surprise party here locally. So that means I get TWO bachlorette parties, a small one out of town, and a big one here Well, everything works out for a reason.